He says I can't meet his friends until I get a promotion??

[Burritowrap]

I have been seeing someone for around a year now. We are exclusive and see each other twice a week or so.
He has been on a beach trip with my friends but seemed awkward but got over the initial awkwardness.
He talks about marriage, moving in together and has told his family about me.

This weekend we went for a meal for their birthday. I had made a big fuss for their day, organising a cake, gifts and took them to a fancy restaurant. I thought he enjoyed it.

He then was talking about some party he is planning to hold, and i said how great it would be to finally meet his friends. He went all sketchy and said how he didnt want that to happen just yet. I asked him why and he couldnt really answer me. He told me he could possibly introduce me once I had a promotion at work so then he could show off my role. (We are both in the same profession).

He then went on during the night saying how I am very full on and he doesnt like it - he wants to wait five years for kids (I don't) and that I should be focusing on my career. He was complaining how I want to get married and he wants to wait. He was the one who bought it all up.

I am so hurt by all of these things. I thought we were on the same page and he just has made me feel terrible. I feel like why bring all of this up on his birthday night... Im not sure how to respond but havent spoken to him since as I am just so upset and done.

There's no coming back from this so don't let him talk you round!

How to respond? Easy, you dump and block. As PP have said, it is good that he has shown his true colours before you get too committed. What an absolute bellend.

In this situation, I'd just send a text. Why waste your time phoning or meeting him?

I also wouldn’t use any 'witty' mic drop suggestions you receove on here. They never come across as whoever has suggested it imagines it will and you can he pretty sure it's not something they'd ever say in your position.

I'd keep it really simple, "Hi, X. I've been giving it some thought and this isn't going to work. It's become really obvious to me that we are just completely incompatible and looking for doesn't things from a relationship so I'm ending it."

I wouldn't block but I would just ignore anything he replied with.

Run for the hills!!!!

The birthday 🎂, gift and restaurant meal is nit over the top.
I think he's preparing to dump you (sorry if I'm being too blunt). Sounds like he's nit-picking.
Ultimately if you are looking for someone to settle down with, he's not for you. 5 years later he might turn around and say he's still not ready for marriage.

Thank him for showing you that you're completely incompatible, wish him well, block him.

Alternatively tell him to go fuck himself and be happy that he showed you he's a POS now, rather than waiting till you're financially hitched.

"This breaks my heart but they offered me a promotion but they are forcing me to break up with you or I can't take it, I will sob while I am singing the paperwork, it's tough but someone has to do it, think of me always"

What a bastard , just send him a text which basically reads
‘ after last nights chat - fuck off’

You deserve better!!!

In fairness to them @Sethera and @SuperLoudPoppingAction have nailed it. Time to move on from this particular individual and find someone who doesn't mind whether you get a promotion or not to be able to meet their friends/family

The best thing is I am actually up for a promotion 😆😆😆

He did not want anyone to know about his age? Well, I heard about some excuses, but this one has to beat all the excuses I have ever head of.... Like they can't figure out his age from his LinkedIn profile? From the electoral register? Oh, darling, you have been led by the nose. Dump him!!!!! Or, rather, stop providing free sex servicing to him and start charging him, if you insist on continuing to sleep with him.

It’s a favourite of mine,OP. Here. Have this. You’ll need it for this assclown.

💐

i am up for promotion and i cant see you again.
i have to concentrate on my job

You are not a trophy.

I'm with everybody else - that is a dumping offence.

Drop him. He isn't going to get any better.

You're supposed to be in the loved-up honeymoon stage, but instead he's telling you all the reasons you aren't good enough.

He doesn't want a partner, he wants the 1950s "nice little wifey at home." Sack him off now.

Never be with anyone who isn't proud of you

Get your promotion... and then ditch him.

You only see each other twice a week, he’s rude and ashamed of you. He doesn’t love you.

Find someone who loves you for you and wants to introduce you to everyone in his life!

Red flags ahoy. He doesn't value for who you are and wants you to be someone else for him. That will never work.

Either that or he's waiting for someone 'better' to come along and is inventing excuses not to commit. Also bad.

Not if he wants her to get a promotion he doesn't.

But it doesn't show that he doesn't think she is good enough just as she is.

NB, if you think you can hold on for that promotion, get it then dump him. That would be hilarious. 😅

If you don’t dump him now he will fuck you about, waste your fertile years and it’ll end anyway. Do it soon and don’t regret it for a second.

Brilliant. Well done you. And you're about to use a lot of dead weight!

Here's a suggested text that you could send him (though I do particularly like the one that @Edingril came up with):

Hi Dan, I've been thinking a lot since the restaurant and I don't think there is any future in a relationship between us. We clearly have very different ideas of what is important, so I wish you all the best but I do not want to continue our relationship and I don't want to see you again. All the best - @Burritowrap "