He says I can't meet his friends until I get a promotion??

[Burritowrap]

I have been seeing someone for around a year now. We are exclusive and see each other twice a week or so.
He has been on a beach trip with my friends but seemed awkward but got over the initial awkwardness.
He talks about marriage, moving in together and has told his family about me.

This weekend we went for a meal for their birthday. I had made a big fuss for their day, organising a cake, gifts and took them to a fancy restaurant. I thought he enjoyed it.

He then was talking about some party he is planning to hold, and i said how great it would be to finally meet his friends. He went all sketchy and said how he didnt want that to happen just yet. I asked him why and he couldnt really answer me. He told me he could possibly introduce me once I had a promotion at work so then he could show off my role. (We are both in the same profession).

He then went on during the night saying how I am very full on and he doesnt like it - he wants to wait five years for kids (I don't) and that I should be focusing on my career. He was complaining how I want to get married and he wants to wait. He was the one who bought it all up.

I am so hurt by all of these things. I thought we were on the same page and he just has made me feel terrible. I feel like why bring all of this up on his birthday night... Im not sure how to respond but havent spoken to him since as I am just so upset and done.

He is a horrible cruel person.

Please leave him.

you don’t treat someone you love like this and he won’t bring you any happiness.

I think you must really know the sensible course of action is to free yourself of this arsehole.

Dump him. He doesn’t value you for yourself. He wants you to “prove” yourself with a promotion and then he may consider introducing you to his friends. Get rid. Find someone who values you for you.

This all sounds very fishy. I suspect there is a lot more to this and it is bizarre that you have not met his friends and family - surely this makes you suspicious? Do you go to his house or does he always come to you? Either way he sounds like a prick and either you are his bit on the side or he is ashamed of you and doesn't want you to meet his friends - neither of which you want. Bin him off and don’t wast any more time and effort on this idiot.

Respond by realising you deserve more than this crap. Honestly, it should be a no-brainer.

Your boyfriend is giving off massive American Psycho vibes. Dump the twat.

@StuckOnTheCeiling
To dump him by text turn to 83
To dump him in person turn to 185
You get your friend to dump him turn to 56.

Don't worry how to dumb him, just dumb him via a txt and never speak to him again. You should have done that when he said all those things.

Would he be much, much older than you, by any chance? Perhaps at the midlife crisis stage? Have you been to his home? Have you got any evidence that he’s not married?

Even if he is single, he sounds utterly horrible. He’s worrying about anyone finding out about his birthday? Does he think people won’t notice he’s ageing? And you can’t meet his friends until you get a promotion and you become someone he can brag about? Vile. He’s all style and no substance. What on earth are you doing with this dickhead?

Personally, I wouldn’t bother giving him an explanation. Just block him on everything. Or, at most, send a text saying ‘This is no longer working for me and I don’t wish to continue any further’. Then block. You are wasting every minute you spend with this man.

Sorry to be harsh - he thinks you're an embarrassment. Time for you to move on, there are respectful men out there.

Nope, don't waste any more of your precious time on him. A simple text should suffice, then block.

I don’t understand this. “This weekend we went for a meal for their birthday. I had made a big fuss for their day, organising a cake, gifts and took them to a fancy restaurant. I thought he enjoyed it.” Whose birthday? Is the “them” and “he” the same person or did people in his family have a birthday and he enjoyed it?

Say you've thought about it and he's not in a high enough role to consider marrying.

Actually, I wouldn't bother - I'd just text we are not compatible, so I'm not going forward with this relationship. Best wishes :) and block.

Just block him. He’s treating you dreadfully…

Well that's over, isn't it !

More red flags than a vexillologist.

Once you've been promoted, become less full on and changed how soon you want children there'll be something else. And something else. And something else. And then to top it off, something else.

For your own mental health, throw him back. You should have met his group now. He sounds like he has a major superiority complex and you're not compatible, he makes you miserable and question yourself for simply being yourself.

So you're good enough to sleep with but not to meet his friends. Either he's married/engaged or he doesn't want a proper relationship. He's definately not ready for marriage or kids, he wants you to forget all about that and work harder to make money.
He's not for you Op, just call/text and say it's over

Why would you even begin to entertain the idea of staying with a complete prick like this? Who does he think he is?!

I might just be a bit twisted but I'd wait until I get the promotion, get the introduction to his friends. Then when they ask why they haven't met you sooner tell them he wanted you to get a promotion, now you've got the promotion you've realised he's just not worth it. Your job doesn't define your worth.

Dump, he only cares about himself,, and his social appearance

You’re not the only woman in his life I don’t think, there’s a wife somewhere.
He’s a dick! 🚩

He wants a trophy wife, one who will meet his "standards" in all respects and likely dump her when she no longer "measures up". Tell him to move to Stepford.

Sounds like a keeper as in somebody you’d keep in a zoo.

I’m not surprised you’re upset. I am agog that the end of your first post doesn’t mention that you dumped him on the spot. You absolutely should dump him btw. Like now.

Get rid