To not have apologised to people near us about my toddler's behaviour on plane ?

[yellowandredcar]

My toddler was just a bit fed up of travelling not silently sitting on the plane. She was a bit loud and excited at times. At times we had to keep telling her to sit down as she tried to stand on her seat. There were many other kids making noise too. We did our very best to keep her quiet and keep her happy. She cried occasionally and occasionally made some noise. It wasn't excessive but the amount you'd expect when there's a small child on a plane.

I noticed people looking and didn't feel like apologising because it was nothing extreme and also she wasn't encroaching on their space.

The man in front of me reclined his seat immediately before we even took off. So I didn't think he deserved any kind of apology about my kids making some noise occasionally.

Also, we were doing our best. We were not ignoring our children or allowing bad behaviour. So I don't see what I need to apologise for. I just ignored the looks but felt like they may have expected an apology. I could be wrong of course.

I have apologised in the past for my kids. If they've kicked the seat in front of it they walk into someone's path etc. but I don't think it's necessary to apologise for children not being silent for a couple of hour flight.

Would you just always apologise because you have a child with you who's made a noise ?

Why do you think anyone expected an apology?

Seems like a mountain over a molehill.

Why do you think someone shouldn't recline their seat?

There's a difference between silent, ordinary chatter and crying , climbing around and making a racket, I would apologise for the latter and I always make it clear to DS the impact his behaviour is having on others. Eg DS sit down and use your indoor voice, there are lots of other people on this plane and you are waking them/disturbing them/giving them a headache.
Tbh if I hear parents do similar even if I don't get a direct apology, you can hear that they are trying to stop the behaviour for the sake of those around them

The issue is why, if it was just normal expected noise, was there more than one 'look'?

Ultimately, if a number of people was expressing annoyance, in all probability, your toddler was more than normally disturbing others and your efforts to stop them were not considered efficient enough.

That you've made a thread and are still fretting about it suggests you realise you've (toddler) made others on the plane feel uncomfortable / not enjoy their journey.

A quick apology wouldn't have killed you and would have acknowledged what happened

Manners cost nothing.

No I wouldn't apologise if he had been behaving within reasonable boundaries.

But if you are posting on here then maybe that wasn't the case? Do you think it was totally reasonable or do you think your child may have been disruptive?

I don't mind but not before we've even taken off and ignoring the fact that you aren't allowed to do it at that point in the flight.

It's not nice when you're taking off and someone has their seat in your face because of the incline and it isn't allowed.

And this.

Just recline your own seat too.

My husband said the same. I have no idea what they were actually thinking.

If they were obviously disturbing people I’d have just done a blanket apology. We took our baby away and I just did a little apology in advance, she’s only little, she’s was never going to be quiet for a full flight, I just said sorry if she does disturb anyone we’re going to do our best! I think it makes a big difference to just acknowledge it really

I think we adjust to our own kids noise so we often aren't aware how loud or irritating they are to others as a parent gets used to it.

If you yourself think she was loud... It was likely she was. Tbh I don't know if I'd apologise to others as that's weird but I might say something indirectly to the child that showed awareness of others.

Its horrible being on a flight near a noisy child.

It's also horrible to be the parent of a noisy child on a flight and know that they are probably pissing people off. But that doesn't mean families aren't entitled to abroad holidays.

I wouldn't directly apologise but I make a point of loudly explaining to my toddler that she is disturbing and upsetting other people and needs to settle down not that she gives a shit.

Basic good manners is to apologise . You may think it's not much disruption but the fact everyone was looking suggests it was .

What is it with you people who inflict yourselves on other people's comfort and yet think an apology has to be earnt .

From the beginning of the flight was what the op said. If that’s before food, if there is any, or it’s not a night flight then the etiquette is to not recline.

why would you need to apologise? You kept it contained and it wasn’t terrible.

There is a special place in hell for people who recline seats in daytime

I don't believe that he was reclined before take off because the stewards wouldn't allow it

This.

I've had far more flights ruined by the behaviour of arsehole adults than children or babies and have certainly never had an apology from any of them!

Inflict yourself on others 😂😂😂😂

Small children have as much right to travel as anyone else. Basic tolerance and understanding means most people realise that small kids get tired, overwhelmed, bored and aren't always able to sit still and silent for long periods of time.

I did all I could to keep my toddler busy on a flight we went on last year. Books, snacks, screens. Even then she still got upset towards the end. Thankfully everyone was very sweet about it. The lady in front of us even gave her some snacks and said she remembered what it was like when her kids were that age.

Did anyone actually say anything good to you or are you getting defensive about something you've made up?

Which means we agree - I never said she wasn't entitled to be on the plane... Just a little awareness of impact on others.

And like you I suggested the indirect route of saying to the child loud enough that others know you're on it.

Ive flown with a noisy baby and yes did quietly mention it to the people behind me looking back but wasn't announcing it to the whole plane. I didn't stop flying because I had kids!

I don't think op is saying they can't recline their seat I think she's just trying to point out that ppl recline their seats and kids make noise ... we all know that reclining is annoying for the person behind so let's not gloss over that 🤣

This. People are allowed to recline their seats.

@yellowandredcar it was the flight attendants job to secure the cabin for takeoff and they should have told them to sit it upright before takeoff!

If more than one person was looking then behaviour was outside normal noise so yes I would have apologised. Have flown more times than I can remember and a reclined seat in front is always preferable to a noisy child.