To think that they had no self-awareness? (It's a child-free wedding one)

[Daisyoopsies]

One of my close relatives got married last year. It was child free but I was breastfeeding. I asked him if husband could bring baby to venue car park so I could breastfeed and then take baby away again during the day (it was in the middle of no-where) so that I could still attend and he said no because it was unfair on other guests. Fair enough. We decided to decline.

They've just had a baby and got invite to a child-free wedding and BROUGHT THE BABY ANYWAY and are now appalled that they were asked to leave.

Do people have no self-awareness? Do people just not care about things until it affects them?

I’m childless and have never married but even I totally understand that a baby is a tiny, helpless person who is totally dependent on the parents, particularly if breastfed, and also that the parents have the right to decide what’s right for their child. Therefore, in this story, I cannot believe the CFery of the bride and groom later turning up to someone else’s wedding with their baby without even asking when they had shown so little consideration for the OP.
Anyway, to me, a curious question from a toddler in a loud voice or a little boy doing “aeroplanes” on the dance floor adds to the fun!

I wouldn't have asked about feeding in the car park.

It wouldn't occur to me to ask my husband to sit about like that when we could be elsewhere enjoying time together!

Well you say close relative but I guess you mean in their relationship to you.

Certainly not in their consideration of you!

I was the first in our friendship groups to have a baby and I had loads of issues like this. Friends inviting me out last minute and being surprised that I couldn't, friends inviting me for weekends away when I was breastfeeding and again being surprised that I couldn't make it. I got quite a lot of grief for missing things but I was a new mum, exclusively bf a prem baby who wouldn't take a bottle. The same friends all now have kids and seem outraged that people don't understand that they can't just drop everything to go on weekends away.
I just chuckle to myself

People who can’t go because they have kids can just decline

Weddings have got so weird, they used to be just big family and friends events, all the kids and babies involved without a second thought, If anyone has seen the Peter Kay stand up bit about family weddings, that’s just how they were, I miss them!

That's a bit harsh. I didn't want a load of kids at my wedding, mainly because I can't have them and it upsets me sometimes.

Your mum is a legend.

Cherrysoup

I think she was insane!
It's not as if she was a friend who had been sidelined in any way.
Meanwhile little rogue bridesmaid was happily flitting around the couple, with guests trying to stop her from photo bombing every picture! She was eventually coralled by a family with children, and baby sat.

Yes I think a lot of people just have absolutely zero self-awareness.

Recently Friend A was telling me about the wedding of a mutual friend that she'd been to; we'd been invited but couldn't attend.

Friend A complained that the ceremony had been too long at 90 minutes, and that she'd had to stand in heels throughout, as she was a member of the wedding party.

Friend A's own wedding ceremony was also 90 minutes long, and there weren't enough seats for all the guests (oh and it was Central Europe in early July so near on 40 degrees without a breath of cool air to be had).

It took everything I had not to blurt out 'sounds very similar to yours, but much cooler!'

What the fuck.

They said no to you breastfeeding in the carpark.

Why did you even ask them?

How very odd of them to believe they could control who entered the car park of the venue and whether a guest went out there to BF. That alone indicates they are as daft as a pair of brushes and that all bets are off with regards to their behaviour. So not at all surprised they decided to take their own baby, or that they'd have friends who'd pause in their own nuptials to ensure the baby was evicted. All as mad as the moon OP. What on earth are you doing in such a circle?

A lot of people have rules and standards for others, but think they should be exempt. It's literally main character syndrome

But why didn't you say that @CheeseWisely? Perfectly reasonable thing to say, at her own she was probably in bridal bliss so didn't realise it.

Oooh, what was her response?!

So many of these stories on Mumsnet sound like absolute fabrication

Karma at its finest. Love it

Oh the audacity of them thinking rules didn't apply to them - karma indeed

I've seen similar threads on here - grown women admitting they don't want a baby at their wedding because they're worried he/she'll take attention away from them! It's bewildering. Do people genuinely believe all the guests at their wedding are going to be 100% focused on them for the entire day? Weddings last for ages.

Hypocrisy runs wild!
But I cannot get my head around: they said NO to bringing a baby to the CAR PARK??? Why would thay be special treatment? That makes no sense!
I wouldn't even have asked them, unless they had to give your husband some sort of guest pass to access the car park? Otherwise would just have thought me going to the car park to BF would be the same as me having gone to the toilet for few minutes?

my mum just said "what goes around comes around then" (she's much braver than me!) and they changed topic VERY quickly.
Love it!

I'm always really surprised at these issues with weddings. Yes, the couple often don't have children, so may not understand the challenges of a young baby. But the parents of the couple are often involved in planning and certainly do! We had a few small babies at our wedding, and my mum thought of all sorts of thug that I didn't - she contacted the mums to ask about what they might need for naps/feeding etc, and although we were totally fine with people bf wherever, she also set up a small area for feeding mums in case they wanted privacy/quiet. If any/all of my children Marry it's the sort of thing id think it was my job to remind them of.

Cant believe they said no to you feeding in the car park! DC4 was 4 months old when I was invited to a child free wedding. Luckily it was only 45mins away so my mum came with the pram and walked the baby round the hotel grounds until it was feeding time. There were other grandparents/dads doing similar.

I don't think there's anything wrong with a couple to request no children at the wedding, as long as they accept that it means some people will decline the invitation. It's not reasonable to deny you to feed your child in the car park, but tbh, it wasn't necessary to ask.

This sounds hilarious 😂 and deserving of its own thread.

If anyone invited me to a wedding so ungraciously I wouldn't go anyway.

They sound like two utter bellends. The fact that they said no to you breast feeding your baby in the car park of the wedding says it all really. I could not be bothered having 'friends' like this. I'd point it out thought. Embarrassed for them!