To tell MIL she can't hold baby

[FreightTrain]

Just arrived at in-laws with our 7w old DD, they've met her twice.

MIL gets cold sores, discussed with DH in car and asked him to be on look out for if she has one as she can't hold baby if so. Arrived, no cold sore but after being here ten mins it seems she is a bit ill. Sounds hoarse, nose a bit red, popping cough sweets. DH is an oblivious man so either hasn't noticed or hasn't put 2+2 together about it not being ideal to have our baby around her.

I've managed to escape the room that they're having lunch as baby needs fed. I want out of here asap and don't want her to hold baby. What do I do?!

I might it amazing how many MIL cold sores these days! Not many "D"M, just the MIL's

You are making a mountain out of a molehill. A cold is not a potentially dangerous illness. Do you stay home, don’t take to daycare, don’t send older kids to school and do grocery delivery and make husband work from home cause you have a 7 week old in the house? When you decide family is a hazard before you get to their door, when you scrutinize their face for signs it seems more about not liking them or not wanting to share the baby for a few hours. If you have a baby and the baby gets sick you simply take care of it. “ It’s a dangerous business going out your door, if you don’t keep your feet… “ the car seat is a country with a health system and medicine and fluids widely available. Is mom paranoid of catching a cold for 38 weeks? Does she drop the baby off at moms if she starts coming down a cold so the baby does not die?

My son was 8 weeks old when he nearly died from a “cold”. It’s not making a mountain out of a molehill to avoid contagious illnesses WHEN YOU CAN if you have a newborn. It’s common sense.

Honestly don’t waste your time replying to @HVfan guys, they’re baiting for a reaction. Clearly nothing better to do on this Saturday night than trawl two month old posts trying to cause drama 🥱

I know this thread is old, but my three week old developed viral meningitis, had a lumbar puncture, spent nearly two weeks in hospital while they identified the virus, and was pumped full of toxic antivirals (in case it was the deadly cold sore herpes simplex virus) and antibiotics while they figured out what it was. The medicines burnt and destroyed her tiny veins. At one point she had five cannulas in her tiny little body. All from a virus, as it turned out, that usually presents as a ‘common cold’ (brought in by a visitor who didn’t tell us)

Same thing happened to her at seven weeks with another virus generously given to us by a visitor, only this time she nearly died and was in PICU for two weeks, after being transported to GOSH. The two ‘common’ viruses had damaged her heart. Watching my baby be heart massaged in resus will stay with me forever.

Exactly this, I get cold sores and neither of my now adult children have ever had them.

I appreciate this is a couple months old. But totally reasonable op. Hope your baby is doing well

Thanks @autienotnaughty

She is now 15 weeks old (I think 😂), happy and healthy, and thankfully so far, has never had so much as a sniffle. She has also spent plenty of time with her Grandma, who contrary to popular belief, I do not hate (even if she can be a bit annoying at times 🙃)

At 7 weeks old I would be saying this to my husband, it’s not precious to want to avoid illness for such a small baby.

It's a first child thing. When baby no 2 comes along and you have a toddler with a permanent head cold, colds suddenly don't seem as dangerous as all that.

I've got to disagree here... Mum if three and no, babies immune system is not mature enough at 7 weeks old... All that nonsense that they need to be exposed to diseases is just not true, definitely when they're this little.
A 24-48h cold for an adult can be 7-10 days for a baby that young, and not only their immune system is not mature enough to fight it, but also consider blocked noses and feeding struggles and potential dehydration and hospitalisation..
Newborn babies aren't toys.

It's not that they need to be exposed to diseases so young @AliciaSoo it's just that younger children inevitably are. What did you do when your older children got colds, lock them in their bedrooms? Did you never have to look after a sick toddler and a young baby at the same time?

Of course, but that's unavoidable, and even then you try not to mix them up if the oldest are full of a cold or d&v with a young baby.
The situation that OP is describing it's complete avoidable and she doesn't have to expose her baby if she doesn't want to.