FFS why don't you drive ??

[nextdoorconundrum]

So annoying to read threads on here that start with .. I don't drive .. my dp/DH does ..

Why why this is even a thing ? Does benefit of penis somehow render them more able to? Does their testosterone somehow benefit their abilities.. or is it simply something men regard as an essential in life ?

Before you all pile on .. yes there are certain disabilities that count you out . Severely visually impaired.. uncontrolled epilepsy.. but when one of my best mates who has spina bifida managed it with a hand controlled car via motability.. I think perhaps it's just not trying hard enough and happy for the man to do the driving .. even my autistic step son (severe - (special school until 21) got his license..

There is only one reason I can think not to bother - and that is because you are city dwellers with excellent public transportation .. but the rest of you .. why ? It just seems so 'weedy' .

My ex was the driver, his choice. I have never wanted to learn to drive because I’ve always been scared of hurting someone (human or animal) because of my anxieties and disabilities. It’s people’s choice to want to learn or not, and it doesn’t make them bad people.

Exactly. If most women drive, how can anyone say we are being persuaded that driving is not important?
Those who don’t drive have their reasons, nothing to get angry about.

Feeble is the word! 🤣

This is me! ( not auto ) people don’t understand and tell me to get over it! If I could don’t they think I would? The anxiety is horrible I don’t choose to be like this! I learnt at 37. I live near a bus stop so I’ll be fine 😉

I think it’s a generational thing. When I was 17 (40 years ago) all we talked about was learning to drive. It was the thing we all assumed we’d do - much like today’s 17/18 year olds assume they’ll go to university. Priorities have changed.

I'm not mad keen on driving these days but I would never get rid of the car as during the last six years with my dad and then me, we had loads of hospital appointments to do. Dad would have struggled on buses and the time it takes to get to the hospital on public transport would drive me nuts.

I'm picking up a friend next week from hospital as her husband panics about parking so doesn't want to do it and she can't drive as she is having a procedure. She also gave up driving about 10 years ago so everywhere she goes, someone else has to take her.

I never want to be having to ask people to ferry me around, it's not always convenient and it can be a right nuisance if someone asks you to drive them here, there and everywhere but if you ever need a lift, they can never reciprocate.

@Gogogo12345 what if you can't drive anymore for any reason? Will the world end? Will you become half an adult and sub par parent?

I dont, i do live just outside a city. At times it would be handy but it scares me honestly, i think id be a terrible at it and its so expensive?

This is such a short- tempered, intolerant thread that is bringing out some seriously ill- natured attitudes . Even the “FFS” in the op…

My first boyfriend couldn't drive when we first got together so I had to drive everywhere ( he did learn on the end).
Both DH and I drive and eldest DD is learning. DD2 is saving up for lessons ready for next year. Both my parents drive, all my SILs drive and my sister.
Not convinced that most women don't learn as I can only think of one friend who doesn't.

At least the non-driver won’t be missing out by not dating someone like that poster.

In this instance, no.
It's not the same as not liking coconut or not wanting to go base jumping

You’ve never needed a car for anything? Oh come off it 🙄

I can drive but I don't have my own car any more. I don't like driving, am rubbish at parking. I don't like the thought of polluting with petrol or diesel and running a car is expensive.

I catch the bus to work.

I can walk to doctors, dentist, opticians, hairdressers, shops, cafes, restaurants etc.

My town is on a train line and several bus routes to 2 cities and lots of other towns and villages.

The only driving that my DH does on my behalf is to Costco once every 4 to 6 weeks. And an occasional day out to somewhere not on a bus or train route. And we're a team. I do lots of things for him as well.

Well, I have in the sense that I've had to use taxis sometimes, but I've never needed a car of my own for anything. Not sure what is so shocking about that.

I always wonder why so many female drivers on here seem to be so nervous or even terrified of driving.

If you’ve used a taxi then you’ve obviously had the need for a car

Well yes, but the point is I've managed without a car of my own. That's what taxis are there for.

I do. And I found their mindset baffling. I would never say so, obviously. I suppose it's the lack of individual freedom, the assumption that DH will take you wherever, the inability to help on a long journey and so on.

On holiday once in France, we took DH's larger car, which had some problem which meant I couldn't drive it (honestly, not just my lack of testosterone). We stayed on a caravan site and I felt absolutely imprisoned. Couldn't even get to the nearest village by myself. Wouldn't do it again.

Growing up, our house must have been the exception. My DM passed her test and my DF failed his ( in the 60s). He never bothered trying again!

This. And the people I know who don’t drive do expect lifts. I don’t know why people don’t learn (and no it’s not financial for those I know).

All these people who get very grumpy at adults who don’t drive, I wonder if any of them also moan about the state of the planet? But yet they want every adult to own a car. 🤦🏼‍♀️😂

Again I guess it comes down to your lifestyle. Living in the arse end of nowhere without being able to drive would baffle me somewhat, but as a non driver I live somewhere with great public transport. I wouldn't holiday in the middle of nowhere either because that's not what I enjoy doing, I prefer a city break.

OP, I don’t care about your ‘special dispensations’ for people like me who have epilepsy. I would absolutely adore it if I could drive and not be reliant on others. Why should I have to ‘prove myself’ to snooty people like you who think that it’s unacceptable that some people don’t drive? Why should you get to know my medical history just so you can deem it ‘Ok’ that I don’t drive?

Think before you’re so nasty and judgemental.

I don't drive. I can but choose not to. My reasons are my own business entirely, but I can assure you nothing to do with thinking men are better drivers than women. Why on earth would that be the reason when there is so much evidence otherwise? Provided I never ask you for a lift or inconvenience you as a companion by an inability to go with you to places at a distance, the impact of my not driving on you is only beneficial. One less person on the road for you to get frustrated with. One less person causing congestion and pollution. If your women friends are annoying you by not driving, then take it up with them. What strangers on MN do is nothing to do with your life, so no need to get in a tizzy about it.