to exclude my friend from a holiday because she's got a boy?

[brownmouse]

regular here blah blah (we need an acronym for this )

I have a small group of 4 friends, we all have 1 child of the same age (5)

One of us has a boy

I am arranging a summer break for us all but the three of us with girls really don't want the other person coming along. The girls play nicely together while we sit around talking. The boy is loud and whacks the girls and is constantly full of energy, and is constantly knocking into us, interupting our conversation.

We'd like a summer BREAK where we sit around while the girls play. If we invite the mum-of-boy it won't be a break, it will be noisy and stressful.

Should we arrange it and exclude her, or just invite her and accept that it will just be a child-focussed holiday?

I the real world people do not trashtheir holidays by invitin people who are going to wreck it. Its not Like a bday party

2008 thread!! All teenagers now!

Read to you saying you won't go - please go tell you friend the truth he is a handful and doesn't like playing with the girls - perhaps she would like to come on her own, also she needs friends with boys as they do play differently.

ZOMBIE THREAD

The children are fourteen now!

You're UPSET that people think you're a bad friend when you're not????

Have you ever been in a situation where a group of close friends leave you out of an event?
It hurts like hell.
I'm sad for the other mum who's going to be left out because her child won't play nicely for hours so his mum can sit and chat.

If you care about your friend at all, please don't do this, she'll be so hurt!

You are a horrific friend to even consider this. I'm part of a group of 5 friends and we all have children and there's no way EVER that four of us would plan something and purposefully leave the other one out because her child didn't fit in with our plans.

I'm disgusted you'd even consider it. In fact I'm disgusted the idea even entered your head. Your poor friend and her son.

Perhaps you should be honest with her about how you all really feel about her and her child so she can have her eyes opened to the sort of people she's friends with and then she can go out and find some better ones.

Echoing others, it sounds as if what you're looking forward to is a holiday so minimally focussed on children that you'd be better going away by yourselves.

We don't know that the difficult boisterous child is boisterous because he's a boy. But also not sure that it's helpful to label children of this age as being permanently "the x one". If you did go away all together, it wouldn't amaze me if the boisterous boy found lots to occupy himself and interest him and one of the other children spent the entire week playing up...

Good luck.

ZOMBIE THREAD

ARGH! I've just dedicated a good 10 minutes to this thread.

Bloody Zombies.

S~T~O~P B~U~M~P~I~N~G Z~O~M~B~I~E T~H~R~E~A~D~S

NINE YEARS OLD PEOPLE - NINE YEARS!!!!!!

Wtaf?

Who resurrected this? Should be shot!

How on earth do you find threads that ended 6 years ago?

Why the hell would you restart one?

The kids are probably studying for their GCSEs now. 😂

ZOMBIE!!

As a mother of a spirited child. Wow. Yabu.
Well either a reverse or I hope you all go and the girls bicker and squabble and make your BREAK hell. So there

Can the OP please come back? I want to know if she is still friends with the other women?!

I think more threads should be resurrected!

Different forums have different rules so can be confusing for new posters. I left one forum because you got slapped on the wrist if you started a new thread when somebody had run a similar thread on a more or less similar topic back in 2008. Got far too confusing for me, but this is why you see zombies walking: it's a MN rule rather than a rule that applies to the whole of the internet.

Wait till the other children of the group grow up and show more difficult behaviours, you will regret being so harsh then.

Wait till the other children of the group grow up

LOLOLOl... is 9 years enough time to wait?

Poor op. She's accepted it won't be a good idea if she values the friendship.

I think it's perfectly natural to move towards doing more just adult things as the children get older and have different interests. It's certainly happened in my two friendship groups. Now seems to be the time the op is coming to this conclusion.
In one of my groups I know that they meet up with sometimes with their kids. I made the decision to stop taking mine because mine stopped enjoying them. In the other it was because of another particular child. No hard feelings anywhere. It's just natural progression.

Op. In time the friend herself may come to the conclusion that her ds doesn't enjoy the meetings. You can sow the seeds with a few non judgemental observations about the dynamics. In the meantime take things slowly, start doing more adult only events and build up to more girly events and activities. In time you might be able to go on the mini breaks without causing offence. But she is likely to be upset without the gradual build up.

Oh zombie - it's just bloody taken me ages to write that sodding post.

How did it pan out op?

Playing fast and loose with the term "friend". Imagine if the tables were turned and how excluded you'd feel. She probably knows he's full on and needs her friends.

You have got to be kidding?

You sound like a bitch op, poor little boy!

It's been resurrected zombified a few times too,

Good lord - I posted on the original thread.

Very wise I was too