Should a sahm do dh ironing?

[crocly]

I have 2 small children and one due in October and I hate ironing.
I haven't ironed dh shirts in about a year since I told him I was not going to do it.
The ironing pile has grown over the past year and dh is complaining he has no clothes and he keeps asking for them to be ironed and nothings been ironed in a year.
It's all his T-shirts I don't iron my clothes and I don't iron the children's unless it's a particular item that needs it.
I am a sahm at the moment but I really don't like ironing and nor does he am I right to refuse as he wears it, he irons it or is this just part of my role as a sahm?

Wow, big problems.

To be honest I'd just to it if I were the stay at home parent. However I dislike his expectation that you do it.

Strike a deal, he clears the back log and you keep up to date with it. As a previous poster said you'll be doing it with uniforms...

I don’t know if I’m the only one, but I definitely notice and can tell the difference between people who have ironed their clothes and people who haven’t. It does not personally affect me but it looks awful!

I stopped ironing most things in COVID. Now I just iron linen and the odd shirt. Yes I think that ironing is under the remit of sahm. Just take things out of the drier and hang them up.

Mine are teens now...but even when they were babies and toddlers I did all the ironing

I don't know if my children were unusually difficult but when they were under 5, there is no way I could do housework while looking after them.

I could just about manage to keep the house from looking worse at the end of the day - i.e. could manage making them food, tidying up after it, tidying up toys and other mess - but I really did not have extra time for other housework.

On maternity leave, we continued to split chores (and have a cleaner)

If dc were in school so you had some time on your own I'd say it would be a nice thing to do. But with littlies running around the last thing you want to be doing is wielding a hot iron!

I don't iron in our house, I wash and dry and put away and if DH thinks it needs ironing then it's up to him.

I do the ironing , I used to iron so much when the kids were younger fiddly bits on their little clothes. I rarely do any ironing now if things are hung well while drying it makes things easier . I like ironing it's the putting away after that I hate.

What is this 'ironing' of which you speak...?

😊

(And to the pp who said about uniforms - DH irons them too!)

Not necessarily. Most uniforms are now polo shirts, or you can buy non-iron kids’ white shirts and blouses.

How do you know whether your guess re. ironed Vs not ironed is correct?

Do you ask everyone whether they've ironed their clothes or not?!

Hahahahahahahaha.

We don’t iron but I think no, if I did. He pays a service to do his shirts sometimes. I do do all the laundry, but let him pair up his own socks, put it away etc. Like others have said, the majority of my job is about the kids, I’m not a family maid.

Im just enjoying my luxurious lifestyle having baths and painting my nails every afternoon 😆

You seem to have conveniently forgotten the 3 small children

When our kids were young DH always did the ironing on a Sunday - it was his way of managing to watch a couple of hours uninterrupted sport 😂
Now we’re old, no kids at home, DH still does all the ironing - and makes sure all the laundry is done! Our laundry basket is always empty by Saturday afternoon!
I have always worked full time until I semi retired 3 years ago. He’s always worked FT, still does.

I hate ironing, especially in hot weather but I work part time and DC are at school so slightly different but yes I would do it on a Sunday pm, in front of the TV when dh is on childcare duty.

I'd rather iron than look after the kids as I've done the majority of childcare during the week so it's a weird me time 😁

Yes you should. I work full time as a teacher and I have 2 children. I do all the washing and ironing. Surely your children are entitled to 15 hours free childcare a week, so you can use some of that time if they are not in school.

What was it about Covid that stopped you ironing? Surely we all had more time to be at home and catch up with it? Do you mean you weren’t being seen by anyone outside the family (except on blurry zoom calls) so it no longer mattered about looking neat?

Buy easy iron shirts and get a garment steamer or send his clothes out to be washed. Not worth feeling miserable about

When I was a sahm I did all day to day housework. Exh did clean the bath each weekend and mowed the grass. If they are out all day supporting the family it seemed only right to play my part fully. Kids don't need to be entertained for 10 hours a day, or I would put younger in a carrier and older would "help". Ironing was at best periodic i admit but I would sometimes put on a dvd (showing my age) on a Sunday and he would take them out

This luxury of bring a SAHM is a crook of shit. She might not even want to be a SAHM. I don't want to be a SAHM. I become one because the cost of childcare for 2 was higher than my actual income. Every way of me working has met resistance. I can't do nights because DC wakes up several times a night and it will impact his ability to work. I can't do weekends because we won't have any family time. I can't do evenings because he sometimes finishes late. Now my child is starting reception I can't do school hours because he's not prepared to use all his AL to do childcare and the holiday provision is shit. The suggestions I go and work in a school or childcare provision. I can't do it. I don't want to and I don't have the capacity to deal with IDs all day.

ETA: We had the same earnings capacity and he wouldn't be a SAHP. I asked him to.

I never ironed my husband's clothes when I was a sahm.
I never ironed school uniform either.

Clearly they have either not ironed or ironed really badly, the outcome is the same. I am sure that PP disapproves of bad ironing as much as she disapproves of no ironing.

With 2 young children and another one on the way? I barely iron, I don’t iron dhs stuff and if I’m pregnant he’d iron my things. Leave it op. He can watch tv while he does it.

Reason number 5000012 not to become a sahm. And not to marry a man who expects his shirts ironed.

I never ironed shirts because DH was ex military and wanting to be the perfect wife I ironed some in the first week we were married and he complained about the way I'd done it. I never ironed another in 30 years.

I did do all the other ironing though, including tshirts.

As a SAHM, I do think the house and laundry is part of the role, freeing up weekends for fun for everyone.