FFS how does exH keep getting girlfriends?!

[RealHousewivesOfTaunton]

The man has more red flags than a Chinese flag-waving competition.
🚩 Four children by three different women, two of whom he has no relationship with.
🚩 Two acrimonious divorces.
🚩 Two non-molestation orders to stop him harassing two of the mothers.
🚩 Convictions for drug-driving and driving without insurance.
🚩 A history of alcohol problems.
🚩 Can't seem to hold down a job and is financially incontinent.
🚩 Moves in with his sisters when he's between girlfriends because he doesn't believe "the man of the house" should have to cook, clean or do the laundry, even when he's the only one in it.

And yet, he's just moved in with yet another woman with her own children and a professional job. Why?! What could possibly be attractive about him as a LT relationship prospect? I can't imagine for a second that he's sharpened up his skills in the bedroom. The mind boggles.

FWIW I was wife #1, so didn't have any of the above history as a guide when I made the extremely poor decision to marry him.

Guys like this know how to latch onto a type. They find women who are struggling with self esteem (i.e they may have a good job but maybe have always felt rejected in relationships) and they latch onto that and play the "oh I can understand this, my ex did x,y,z" and the women see someone who "gets them" because they have also been hurt and feel safe because of the false assumption "he wont hurt me cos he knows what its like to be hurt". Unfortunately too many women fall for it - when you spend as many years single as I did you learn from watching others in their relationships and see things you just don't pick up on otherwise. My first rule for meeting someone was "if the ex is described as crazy as reason for relationship not working run a mile" it's a good rule to have. But I also know in my 20s I'd have fallen for it. Also some women will just take any man for the sake of having a man. You had a lucky escape. Current girl will figure it out in her own time.meanwhile if she tries talking to you in public tell her you're not interested in her parenting opinions since she feels safe to have her kids around a man with drug convictions and she can mind her own damn business!

I guess this is why he "keeps getting girlfriends" as he can't fool them for long and they move on!

I hear you @Lotty101 but I also don’t think low self esteem is as big a factor as one might think.

these guys aren’t treating women badly at the start.

of the women I know who have ended up with one of these blokes, many of them are confident and have high standards. That’s what makes them vulnerable because these guys are very charming and are actually very different from your average emotionally reserved bloke. These are women who are usually holding out for the big romance rather than going for the usual reliable ‘average joe’

They will definitely put a dent in women’s self esteem, once they realise they’ve been fooled.

I agree that if women stay in it long after the romance has faded, there’s possibly a self esteem issue. But actually- sounds like these women get rid as soon as Prince Charming turns into a frog.