Are we invited or not?

[WeddingConfusion]

We've received an invitation to DH's niece's wedding later in the year but it's not clear to us whether we're invited to the whole day or just the evening.

On the front of the invitation our names have been beautifully handwritten but the rest of it - details, inserts and RSVP card - are all printed.

One of the inserts is an Order of the Day giving timings of everything from guests arrival, ceremony, photographs etc. through to carriages at midnight. Based on the fact we've been sent one of these DH and I are assuming we're invited to the whole day. However...

Underneath the printed details of the date and venue, in the same beautiful handwriting, it says "evening party starts at 19.00". This is half an hour earlier than the time on the Order of the Day and it's making us wonder if that's the time for evening guests to arrive and we are, in fact, only invited to the evening. If that's the case though then we don't understand why we've been sent an Order of the Day if we don't need one.

Obviously one of us will have to phone SIL for clarification but before we do I thought I'd put it to a poll and see what others think. It is, of course, quite possible we're overthinking it and it's perfectly obvious (to everyone but us!) but it would be dreadfully embarrassing to turn up to the bit we're not actually invited to or to only turn up in the evening when we should have been there all day!

YABU - It's perfectly clear you're invited to the whole day
YANBU - It's obvious you're only invited to the evening

Perhaps they’ve included the order of the day so that the evening only people can see what they are missing

ODFOD. I've been doing other stuff if that's okay.

Tried phoning SIL but she's clearly busy talking to someone else so will try later. Or tomorrow.

If you find the thread tedious you can always pop over to another one 😁

I just can't believe that, after all these years of wedding issues, no one has your username!

I would assume just the evening bit, but that would be wishful thinking on my part 😂

I've been doing other stuff if that's okay.

mumsnetting about it! 😆

perhaps the OP secured a load of usernames years ago.

All for different scenarios

I would say you’ve been invited to the whole day but there was a typo on the invite about timings for evening do which they’ve corrected on all the invites. It’s bloody confusing though and a bit awkward ly done, agreed!

I’ll go for the 3rd option of I have no idea from that either OP!

Yep it’s confusing
let us know! I wonder if she’s busy on the phone because another fifty people are asking about this

😂 that genuinely made me laugh… thank you!

By the time you wrote this post you could have just messaged your SIL and found out.

brace yourself

op will plough back in and tell you to f* off and that she’s been busy!!! 😆

I’d suggest that if neither you or your DH are close enough to your DN to have her phone number, then probably you’re evening guests.

I honestly can’t vote as it’s so confusing!
Imagine if everyone has this conundrum! The thought of that and people turning up to the wrong part of the day makes me feel a bit faint 🤣

Can’t believe you didn’t include an option four: “it’s totally unclear and now your best option is emigration, as asking is going to be super awkward”. I would have picked that option. :-)

I think just evening and they’ve included the other stuff by mistake but who knows 🤷‍♀️

Was that actually necessary? How waspish!

Really???

Which is exactly what you are doing, and it's not even your query. Aren't you a little embarrassed at all?

Is that what you've done?

What is the point of your snipey posts? Are you bored dear?

@surprisedactually not sure why you have to keep posting with your snide comments. Give it a rest!

@Runnerinthenight Cross Post, glad it's not just me.

Such an inane thing to do!

Tried phoning SIL but she's clearly busy talking to someone else so will try later. Or tomorrow.

I imagine she's having call after call of this very question.

Remember when you could press some buttons and the BT line would call you back when they'd put the phone down?

Which would you rather a handful of invited guests missing a chunk of your wedding or evening guests coming to the wedding that they're not invited to. 🤔

Based on what you described it would never occur to me to think you weren't invited for the full day.

If your SIL is an anxious sort she may be the type that likes to know when things will be happening through the day and is just giving everyone the information she would want to have as a guest. They also may be expecting some guests to choose to come to only the evening portion (there are plenty of reasons for this) and they want to make sure anyone who does that arrives in plenty of time for wedding party entrances and such, thus emphasizing a time 30 minutes earlier.