Childcare - is she being a CF?

[Hardknocks]

DH and I both work full time, but he’s off on a Thursday when he looks after DD who is 2.

SIL works 10-4 Monday to Friday and has so far avoided paying for any childcare for 10 year old niece by getting the neighbour to watch her..

Anyway the neighbour can’t do tomorrow or Friday so she has (just) text me to say please could DH have her tomorrow and I have her at home with me Friday (I WFH). I have work meetings but she said oh don’t worry she will just watch tv.. DH thinks she’s being a complete CF. I feel guilty for potentially saying no and leaving her in the lurch but also pissed off that I’m essentially paying for childcare for DD and looking after someone else’s child.

WWYD?

You don’t have to do it, but she is 10 and why do you assume she’d be on a screen all day. She can do other things, maybe bake something (no oven or help with oven), draw, read or whatever.

I'd say we don't do childcare, but here is the nursery number. Oh wait, she's 10!
I'd say no anyways. She is taking advantage of her neighbour and needs to hire somebody.

Because OP wanted to hear that her sister in law is a cheeky fucker and have that validated by as many frothing posters as possible.

I never understand why posters are so keen to post about family members simply to get a rush of gleefully spiteful responses but there it is. I think some posters would absolutely love to hear that everything has gone to shit. Ugh.

Do what you want, OP, but I don't think much of your thread.

If its 1/2 times during the summer hols, not all CF.

Tell her stay home.

Here we go, doesnt get the response wanted, so now theres problems. God, summer hols is hard for everyone, just help out if you can, karma and all that. 2/3/4/5 days during the hols isnt a big deal, come on.

OP is trying to work. She isn’t sat at home doing nothing.

If the 10 year old is so easy, she can go to work with her dad who is self employed.

She said in her OP that she works from home.

Stop being a doormat. Say no, Dh is busy then you’re working.

I agree with this. If you are working, how can you look after a 10 year old? Not possible

I agree, but if my employer didn't allow me to have children around while I was working, it would never even occur to me to ask whether I should offer to watch my niece while WFH

I guess I just find it odd that OP is asking/considering it if she's working and not allowed to have children around in the first place.

She looks after this child at weekends too.
op there will end up being ‘another emergency’ next week or in another week.
I think your dh was right…

Yes, I know, but I know of several employers who wouldn't have an issue with a 10 year old watching TV while their parent worked, especially as a one-off.

This epitomises the reality of WFH! How can one possibly work in the presence of 7/9 year olds? Irrespective of how good they are or how they may entertain themselves.

I imagine she’s considering it because SIL has made her feel guilty and she probably feels that as a one off, she is unlikely to be caught.

There’s no way I’d risk it.

Me neither if I was in OP's shoes. Absolutely not worth it.

I would think that the problem is if you manage this time then what's to stop you also managing another time?

I'd say no to both days.

It's a one off. I would. You never know when you need the favour back.

I'd do it... but I like my SIL and I like my niece. Sounds like OP wants permission to say no from a bunch of internet strangers. Then a bunch of strangers have used their own crap relationships to help her justify it.

I actually don’t think it’s necessary to send a lunch but thought that might help the OP feel that it was manageable. I did say they should help…

This!

neither can I, I cant believe how many people have said "say no" its not like they are asking every day, i take it that when OP has her at the weekend its her choice.

Bloody hell there are a lot of hard people around on MN. hope they never need any help last minute or else they should be called CFs too.

Nahhh plenty of summer camps. And a friend of mine got a warning for having kids at home when she was working, I wouldn’t do it

The bit that seems CF to me is them expecting OP to pick up and drop off. Presumably brother drives even if SIL doesn’t. Why should OP’s working day be additionally disrupted by the driving when she’s already helping out with the childcare?!

Also, it doesn’t seem a real emergency to me if brother just doesn’t want to lose a day’s pay. Surely they’ve saved enough from years of free childcare to manage one extra day not working…

I like my family too. I still wouldn’t be doing them any favours when I’m supposed to be working just as I wouldn’t expect them to break any rules at their work to do me a favour.