I actually can’t stand chronically late people

[Cadela]

Time blindness is not a thing. I have adhd and uncontrolled epilepsy, I know how hard it is, but constantly being late is the most disrespectful thing I think people can do.

Having to tell someone something starts half an hour later so they may show up on time is ridiculous.

It actually isn’t hard. If you have an appointment or an event, PLAN. If you can’t make it on time, get up earlier.

Yes I’m snotty because I have a friend who has no disabilities and every single time we plan something has never made it at the right time. Drives me fucking potty.

I am ND and suffer from poor concept of time but I have learned coping mechanisms over many years including multiple alarms and thank God for Siri 😂I am rarely late for anything and if I am it will be due to a weird unforeseen disaster. However I literally have zero problem with other people being late (unless its a work thing with strict consequences)
I understand that everyone is different and their lives are different and do not think it is kind or needed to judge others for failings that you might not have! I have plenty enough of my own 😂

I like it when people are late because it makes me feel better about being late (which I usually am)
I'm pretty sure if I got assessed I'd be diagnosed with something but at the end of the day I'm just very easily distracted and useless at time management. Whether that has a name or not makes no difference.
I know how you feel though about being annoyed. It does come across as rude. But know that when I'm late it's never because I dislike or don't respect the person I'm meeting and I'm ALWAYS stressed out and annoyed at myself for it.

Exactly.
How long are we supposed to wait twiddling our thumbs/ stressing about missing connections etc until you decide to turn up?
10 minutes? 20? Half an hour? More?! 🙄

I think those who say they don't mind lateness are perhaps not attending time sensitive events? I am more accomodating if we are meeting for lunch or similar.

I think wherever possible a late person should try to convey via text or similar that they have been held up.
Missing connections etc is quite an extreme example. People with time blindness tend to exert themselves more when it really matters like that; but the stress of doing that over every coffee is too much for them. Normally there won’t be massive consequences like missing connections. If you need to leave for another meeting, just leave when you need to; that’s for them to suck up. But people who get all lemon faced over it are annoying.

I was at the hairdressers a couple of years back and arrived on time only to have to wait twenty minutes as they were running behind. I was totally relaxed and friendly, got a water from the machine and chilled. Then some weeks later I got caught out by road works and was 5 mins late due to temporary traffic lights. The same woman was all stiff and ugly round the mouth snd eye rolling,… well they could probably still see me … if I was lucky. I reminded her about the 20 minute wait I’d had and basically gave her both barrels. By the measure with which you judge others, so too shall you be judged … It’s far better to be a bit accommodating of other’s weaknesses.

We used to live next door to a couple and we got very friendly. Once we invited them for dinner at ours, easier as we had kids in bed to do it at ours. The first time they were an hour late because one of them was feeding the fish, pottering in the garden and various other non-essential chores. Who does that?
When we moved we again invited them for a takeaway. They were an hour and a half late and then dithered about what to order. Our kids were teens and absolutely starving. We didn't invite them again which was a shame because we always had a nice time but it's just inconsiderate.

Being late next door is a bit much!

I think , though, there are examples and examples.

Someone else posted above to say their DH hates going out and dithers on purpose.

That’s totally different - as is pottering round next door with the fish - from someone arriving late in a flurry of panic . Time blind generally worry about being late.

Not everyone has "time blindness" though.
Pisstakers still exist.

I can't really tell who is time blind, who is taking the piss, who is a bit of both, who doesn't like to go out, so I will draw my own boundaries.

Presumably a diagnosis of time blindness was a requirement for ministers in 2020, as no Covid press conference started on time.

Another reason poor old Boris was misunderstood, he was only late for his 5 o clock podium broadcasts because he was time blind!

disclaimer it's a joke, people

Exactly

OK. People who want punctuality deserve bricks in our mouths.🙄 Now I am even more determined to keep my boundaries.

Yanbu i tend to find its very obviously about people's priorities. There are people with levels of learning disabilities with genuine time blindness - these people are identifiable because they have typically lost jobs, missed flights, missed essential medical treatment.

Those people who keep you waiting for every social engagement but manage to make it to the airport in time for their flight to majorca, that's them thinking (often subconsciously) that your time is less valuable than theirs.

But late people absolutely don’t value their own time over the people they’re late for (rolls eyes).

Cant you see that when someone has made so much effort to get to you on time and you rock up late with the justification that “they have so little going on in their lives” that you ARE implying that your own time is more valuable.

I’m sure the OP would rather be spending the time doing something more relaxing, but she has the courtesy to plan ahead and be able to collect DDs friend on time. Can’t you see how someone else repeatedly not returning the courtesy might lead to her not feeling valued or important to the persistent latecomer, especially if they’re unapologetic about it?

I'm a late person (it's ok to hate me, I don't mind!) I'm not always on time and I don't get stressed if I'm running a little late. Likewise I'm not offended if my friends are a little late either. We tend to just let each other know what's going on but it's never a big deal - we've all got busy / stressful lives so I'm just glad to be able to see them, whatever time they arrive.

When I'm late it's not because I'm not valuing other's time or selfishly prioritising myself etc. I was brought up in a culture where strict timekeeping is not as much of an issue so it's never really been something that I've strived to do. Personally for me there are lots of other things to worry about than being a little late.

This made me laugh - Gloria (from Modern Family) 'I want to be the centre of attention' so I'm late clip:

https://www.tiktok.com/@stefaughnyy/video/7175528354173439233

Goodness, what a rude response.

Yes I think that’s what winds people up: they are scared they are surrendering the stage to a self-important type. In reality, the time-blind are normally desperate to slip in unnoticed

Not everyone who is chronically late is time blind, though, right?

Most of the people I know who are always late are exactly the gregarious, outgoing, 'larger-than-life' people. Which is probably why I tolerate it as they are generally fun but it's annoying nevertheless.

Yes. The one person I know who I ditched as a friend who was late, was a high flying city professional. She was always late because she said that she wanted to do things like relax in the bath with her baby a bit longer or go to the beauty salon. Even when we were waiting at her house to have a lunch, she sent a message via her husband that she wanted to go and buy her daughter a top and that was why she was late. She did the tinkly laugh thing as well as if she was such a character. The end of that friendship has been no loss.

Cant you see that when someone has made so much effort to get to you on time and you rock up late with the justification that “they have so little going on in their lives” that you ARE implying that your own time is more valuable.

Your time might be better spent reading the posts properly rather than wasting it with unnecessary replies.

As I have said several times, I'm not someone who is late. I'm just not that bothered by other people who are. I'm certainly not implying my time is more important - quite the opposite in fact. Don't worry though! You're not the first poster on this thread to get so excited about point-scoring that all ability to comprehend basic English goes out of the window! 🤣

Ok, I missed that post 😳😂
Yep, boundaries for pisstakers, time blindness people and random violence threateners.
No idea which one you (general you) is in RL so you can all get in the bin.
😁