Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

[SharpOliveHam]

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

And close the kitchen door (if you have one - we don't).

Please stop putting frozen or very cold towels on your dogs , it buggers up their own cooling system.

It's like if you go into a air conditioned shop then come back out into the heat then go back in again . It takes a while for your and your dogs temp to reset each time .
By all means put a dsmp towel town for them to lie on , or use a slightly damp cloth to wipe the pads on their paws but that's it.

And yrs of course your DH can use the oven / hob to cook his lunch .
The only thing I'd be annoyed about was if he didn't cook me some .

Oh don't be so BLOODY RIDICULOUS🤣🤣🤣

I hate the heat, I open/close blinds and windows to facilitate our home being as cool as possible. I also keep doors closed appropriately to help keep important rooms as cool as possible.

This does not mean I ban usage of the cooker. I just means I'm a tiny bit more vocal about "keep the kitchen door closed" so that the heat is contained as much as possible in one space.

You are very controlling IMO

OP, you say that your DH is selfish because his decision to cook lunch has affected the whole household. But can you not see that your extreme phobia of what is actually very mild heat is also affecting the whole household?

Yeah, one of mine is double coated. Keep them groomed and use a fan. That’s it.

Towels should be damp, not freezing. That’s not good for them.

It’s still ridiculous. And the ‘after all the effort I put in’ is simply you trying to be a martyr and force him into doing as you have said.

96% of replies are that you are being unreasonable and controlling. But you keep coning up with excuses why you are right. Accept that you are wrong, apologise to your husband and move on.

And if you need cold towels and paddling pools for dogs in 26 degrees of heat, then you need to think about whether they are suitable dogs for you. 26 isn't going to be an unusual temperature for the UK in the summer.

This is wild OP, just close the kitchen door and go in another room? I could understand if he had opened the oven door onto your face but this is crazy.

How absolutely ridiculous. It's a bit hot yes, your dogs will be fine, you'll be fine.

You would absolutely bury me, I’ve got the drier on 😆

Frozen cold towels?!?! Where the hell are you?! The Arabian desert?!

You sound like a massive hypochondriac I'm afraid 😐

I always feel sorry for heavy-coated dogs when I see them in the UK. A neighbour of mine had a husky and it was so obviously utterly miserable for 4 months of the year.

I don’t think I could cope with the guilt of having a dog so unsuited to the climate. I expect your anxiety about that is why you’ve taken it out on your husband, but you must know your dogs are uncomfortably hot in summer temperatures anyway! If you made the choice to get dogs who are going to suffer in hot weather you need to take the necessary steps to cool them down with good grace and not act like everything would have been fine and dandy if your husband hadn’t used the oven for an hour.

More hints here: How to keep your home cool in hot weather - BBC News

Get a grip.

You sound bonkers and very controlling. I’ve dogs with long coats. One is sunbathing in the garden at the moment, he loves it and will come in when he wants.

The other one is sleeping on the sofa and is coping perfectly well. I have never draped them with cold towels, and they would be most confused if I tried that 😂

It gets really hot here and we just open the windows and live with it, and my DH doesn’t need my permission to use the oven. Your behaviour is very odd.

You are choosing to go to “all this effort”. Your dogs don’t need a padding pool. You are being ridiculous.

@NetflixAndKill same, I hate crispy line-dried towels 😂

YABU it's his house to. And you know dogs survive living in far hotter countries? The temperature will drop down once he has turned oven off, and surely will only affect the kitchen.

Yabu. People should be allowed to use the oven or hob for any meal.

Double coated dogs 😂😭😭😭😭

So do mine @SharpOliveHam and they don't need frozen towels on them when it's 20-odd degrees and they're inside 😂

They just go and find somewhere cool(ish) to lie in the house. In fact one of them actually loves lying in the direct sunlight in the back garden but he's just strange.

Wow. Poor guy did nothing wrong. If it's too hot in the kitchen then stay out of it.

I understand you being frustrated about him seemingly working against you, but it also sounds like you are frustrated because he isn't helping more widely. Can you not ask him to help with the dogs instead of doing it yourself? I think you need better communication between you - it is fine for him to cook and it likely didn't make much difference, but if you are this anxious about the heat you should have discussed with him and asked him not to do it in advance.

Have a cold shower and don't worry about it.