Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

[SharpOliveHam]

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

Yes I am placing towels I’ve cooled in the freeze on my dogs who won’t lie on cooling mats. Later on I will be the one getting their paddling pools out. Not dh.

Your fixation with the temperature has impacted the entire household.

Are you like this with other things?

This is absolutely bonkers, OP. Do you seriously feel entitled to tell your husband - and the co-owner of the house - that he must only eat cold food in hot weather? He can't cook a meal in his own kitchen?

And stop "running around throwing frozen towels over the dogs", you loon! Buy a cool mat, put plenty of fresh water out and chill your beans before you give yourself an aneurysm.

I'll be your lone voice of sympathy, OP!

We absolutely avoid using the oven on what is literally just a handful of days over the summer when it is actually properly hot. It makes a huge difference to the temperature of the whole house (especially the kitchen, obviously) and it is very difficult to disipate the heat once it has built up.

DH and I are both in agreement though so it's a non issue.

Are you aware that dogs don't melt?

Yes, exactly! Rather an increase in temperature than an increase in tension.

Having the oven on for 30 minutes max will not make any difference to the whole house, unless he’s got the oven door open! You’re massively overreacting and it’s likely the house has got warmer because, well, the temperature goes up as the day goes on, until around 4pm!

Oh dear baby jesus. When you cool stuff in a freezer, the heat that was in the stuff is exchanged into the room air. This is why the back of the freezer is warm. You probably added 2’C yourself by freezing bloody towels.

He hasn't used the oven though has he? He used the hob I imagine for a fry up?

YABU. People are allowed to cook food in their own houses.

You need to invest in products which will help you with your issues with the heat. A Dyson fan might help, or one of those handheld ones which mists water. You can also get bands for your wrists which go in the freezer until you need them.

An air fryer would mean your husband could cook without using the oven.

Yup. Very controlling. Poor guy.

The range oven was on for 40 mins. Sausages were frozen.

Why are you putting frozen towels on your dogs?

what dogs are they?

and again, so what about the paddling pool? That’s got nothing to do with lunch.

They don’t need a paddling pool because he cooked his dinner.

Thanks for raising this. I, too, was puzzling over how you make a "fry-up" in the oven. (Totally realise I am completely missing the point of the thread!)

Oh don't be ridiculous! It's hot but people up and down the country with dogs or without dogs are using the oven to cook in.

Stay out of the kitchen if you're that bloody bothered.

You know the old saying 'if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen'? I suggest you do so - literally! Stick a wet gauze on you, wipe down the animals with one, stick a fan on, sit down and settle down - you're just making yourself even more hot and bothered.

You are the one impacting the household with your over the top reaction.

She literally said in the OP that he doesn't fry so yes, presumably he used the oven.
Anyway the fixation on the temperature is odd and of course he can use whatever appliance he likes in his home.

I don’t handle heat well at all. I even get hives sometimes.

We absolutely avoid using the oven on some days. it didn’t even occur to me that other people use it on hot days.

100% controlling behaviour. If you want to keep the house cool get fans. Don’t dictate what people can and cannot eat.

My point is I’m the one going around making sure house and dogs are cool.

All this effort has gone to waste just cause my dh fancied a fry up.

You would really hate the aga in my house 🤣

Do you realise how much of a martyr you sound?

Are you performatively cooling your dogs between posts to make sure your poor husband understands he has Done Wrong And Must Be Punished?

Op there are real issues in life. Grow up, learn that the world does not revolve around you.

And yes, you're the one feeling the heat, fretting about the heat, so you're the one that will be taking the steps you want to mitigate it.