To be worried about my “Tomboy” DD

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My 6 year old is constantly being asked if she’s a boy or a girl. She usually just refuses to reply at all, or she will say once that she’s a girl. Some children seem to ask repeatedly though. She’s beginning to get really annoyed about it. I’m not sure how to help her deal with it.
90% of her clothes are from the “boys section” in shops. She has long hair but refuses to tie it up unless she has to for sports activities. It’s probably her mannerisms that make children think she is a boy though, more than anything else.
I obviously don’t want to change her, but I wish I could stop children being so rude. I know I can’t affect the behaviour of other though. Any suggestions of what she could say when asked, that may stop the repeat questions would be great!

🤨 what do you mean by "normal girls"? Having a collection of stereotypes that constitutes being a normal girl is exactly the problem !!

I have managed to develop into a reasonably functional member of society despite having never had any interest in make up, clothes, ballet, gymnastics, pink or dolls. I don't consider this makes me any more or less a woman!

No! She does watch a football drama on CBBC though that she’s obsessed with. She doesn’t watch YouTube and rarely American kids tv for 5 mins in a morning before school. She watches iPlayer and Bluey!

I don’t, I just knew people would know what I meant using that term. Couldn’t think of a better one. When people say she’s a Tomboy I say she’s a girl who likes football.

You're making this into a very big deal when it isn't.

So either you're exaggerating or you have an issue with her being perceived as the wrong sex (or a bit if both?)

No 6yo is being repeatedly asked if they are a boy or a girl.

What on earth are boy mannerisms???

6 year olds are just 6 year olds.

If they ask her if she's a boy or girl just get her to ask them back or respond that she's an alien!

So weird to assume OP is lying about this very mundane issue. I can assure you my 6yo has been asked multiple times , not sure why I'd make it up

And I don't have an issue with it - it sounds like OP doesn't really either, except that it is upsetting her daughter

So she's still got long hair which is feminine, likes football and wears non girly clothes? Id be pissed off with other kids asking if she was a boy as it makes no sense.

It makes sense when you realise schools and TV are propogating all this gender claptrap

She does go to girls football each week thanks. They’re not allowed to do mixed sessions until they’re older apparently, that’s the case locally anyway.

I'd teach her to respond confidently that she's a girl. It's not rude of small kids to ask, that's what they do. I think it's on you to teach her confidence in answering. My dd is 11 and dyslexic. I have taught her that if anyone says why can't you do this or tries to make fun of her she needs to be confident in who she is. All but the very biggest of arseholes will back off with a confident answer.

I wondered that

Why would I? How strange that you’d think that. I think they ask repeatedly because she refuses to answer or because they can see it annoys her, or both.

You can definitely fuck right off now! This is so far off it’s laughable. I’ve got a family member who would’ve possibly been groomed into puberty blocker bullshit as a child if she wasn’t born 40 years ago and that terrifies us both. I voted for the Party of Women in the general election as we were lucky to have a candidate locally. That’s how far off you are!

Perhaps because her DD prefers them? Or because they are invariably better quality, less flimsy, offer more coverage and more choice?

You can definitely fuck right off now! This is so far off it’s laughable. I’ve got a family member who would’ve possibly been groomed into puberty blocker bullshit as a child if she wasn’t born 40 years ago and that terrifies us both. I voted for the Party of Women in the general election as we were lucky to have a candidate locally. That’s how far off you are!

There’s one boy in her class who asks her just to wind her up I’m sure. She’s been in his class all term so he knows she’s a girl.

Oh do get off your high horse. I danced until I left for uni. You completely missed the point of what I was trying to say.

And your experience doesn’t trump mine

School I guess, she says that’s what the girls like playing and she doesn’t. She always gravitates to boys in the park as well. I tell her girls are ace, I’m a girl, Granny’s a girl, my best friend who she loves is a girl. It’s ace to be a girl! We can grow babies and do all sorts of other amazing things.

In what way? They like those things so play games related to those things.

Not as limited as the boys section
Go in any clothes shop and there's rows and rows of girls stuff
And a bout half a row of boys stuff.

I appreciate your opinion greatly actually. I do worry about this kind of thing. I try to encourage friendships and with girls, while at the same time facilitating her friendships with boys she’s close to. She’s been invited to girls houses twice for tea and refused to go. She will go to birthday parties of girls at school but always plays with the boys when we’re there. I’ve suggested gymnastics classes a few times because she’s always leaping about, of course she’s 6, but she’s not interested. She’s not keen on animals and I couldn’t afford horse riding anyway unfortunately.

This is scary!! Luckily we live in an area with small towns and villages, nearest large city 1.5 hours away. So it seems to have not taken over our schools from what I hear, yet.

Exactly, what’s a “normal girl”? 🙄

How am I making it into a big deal? She’s been upset about it today, hence me posting. She’s also been upset in the past a few times this term and annoyed a few times this term.