Son dropped out of college and secretly studied other qualification

[SharpOliveHam]

Son is 23. Very bright. Went to one of the top grammar schools in the UK. Got 100% in one of his maths A levels. But equally he leaves things to the last minute, possibly has ADD. If he’s not interested good luck getting him to do anything.

Son messed up his AS Levels (did well in one subject) and chose to leave his grammar school for the local college.

Son confessed that he messed up AGAIN at college and instead of repeating another year he actually dropped out of college and studied an Access course with a distance learning place.

He went to Edinburgh University! Paid for course with Saturday job money and birthday money. Son confesses to Dh and I he would study at the local town library. We received no letters or phone calls from the college.

I’m pleased he had the tenacity to do this but hurt he couldn’t confide in me. His siblings have been successful with academics - one is studying dentistry and the other is at Oxbridge. So assume pressure was a part of it.

I just wanted to share as I am still trying to process this. He told us he got AAB.

I can't get over we got a Chinese 😁

How did he get 100% in his maths A level then?

And further, how does he know what the %age score was?

I'm not fully understanding this either

With a gun to her head my mother could not tell you what offers I held or what my degree classification was.

She will tell you I went to uni. Proudly. And that's that 🤣

Why??

Given your reaction no wonder he didn’t trust and feel comfortable sharing about failing college

I meant 100% in an AS level exam

You're upset with how he got to university. He's done it and he showed determination in the end, he got a first. What did he study?

Are you in England? What does put him in the year below mean? Was it a private school?

I think you probably owe him an apology, your reaction after his initial failing of year 12 obviously meant he didn’t feel he could talk to you again about his second year 12 failure. He made a plan but still didn’t feel he could tell you about it.

he’s obviously decided he can’t talk to you about his problems. Can you work on that.

He's amazing for pulling it back like that, so dedicated and resourceful. But he shouldn't have had to do it alone and it's really sad he didn't feel he could be honest at the time and ask for support. What a lot of stress he must have been carrying.
I can understand your feeling upset from that perspective.

The strange things people remember. I just found it amusing

We are in England. He went to private for primary. We just chose to send him to school a year later as we thought he would have a disadvantage being an August baby.

You can do the access course INSTEAD of A levels to get to uni.

Well done to him for finding out what worked for him and having the oomph to sort it. Much better than the youngsters who expect parents to sort out stuff for them

with all due respect to our spooks, not everyone will be the A* but at the same time, part of a good skill is being able to decieve, so its a good starting point, and at a guess the part of the time is convincing the public that x event was or is a completely different cover story

Are you not curious about why he deceived you, though?

No you don't You have to be 19

Jacqjacqgeau · Today 20:49
"You have to be 21 to do an access course. Sorry this doesn’t make any sense at all"

No you don't you have to be 19 . My son did one at 19.

Hold on, he's 23 and he already has his degree from Edinburgh? And he did an access course aged 19? That would have put him at 20 when he started uni. How did he do a 4 year degree in 3 years? Is my Maths all messed up again?

Agree timeline does not stack up, especially if he started school at 5.Scottish degrees are 4 years minimum.

I wonder if this bothers you because you question why he felt he had to lie?

Come on, we all know why he lied.

OP, give your head a wobble. He fucked up, just like every other teenager on the planet since the dawn of time, but he fixed it. In spectacular fashion too, I'd say. He showed a good amount of initiative, resourcefulness and determination at a relatively young age.

Forget about the bloody Chinese, stop comparing him to his siblings and be proud of where he's at now.

Hats off to him he sounds incredibly resourceful! MI5 should tap him up 😂

If I was his parent I would be more impressed by this than if he sailed through it all and got everything right first time. He has shown strength of character, determination and initiative.

I realise it's but ideal. But at least it was a secret access course and not crack.