If your Dh died or you got divorced do you think you'd remarry

[Eastereggmadness]

My DD 10 asked me this out of the blue? And asked me to promise I never would! (She'd watched some programme with new stepmum in it).
And it got me thinking. I don't think I ever would at least till they were grown up) as I don't think my kids would like it. But maybe that is a bit martyrish of me. I wonder what others think.

Not a chance in hell. But I am in my early 50s. I don't want to live with another man now.

No I would stay alone as it’s easier and less stressful to be alone, I feel like my dh and his family are my extra burdens and responsibilities and it’s exhausting

I love how adamant you are, @CharlotteRumpling. 🤣
Im exactly the same, I wouldn’t want another man cluttering up my space!

Myself and DH are in our early 30’s and if I died I’d want him to eventually find love and happiness again with someone else. I wouldn’t want him spending the rest of his life alone.

I think it’s very dependent on who you are, your age and what you need in your life. If I was 60 and my DH divorced or died I probably wouldn’t bother!

yes, very dependent on age. Also on existing children. I would make a shit stepmum and I wouldn't want my DC to have to get used to another man either.
I often think stepmums have a really tough road.

Nope. Not unless he was older, much, much richer and well trained. Also I'd want separate bedrooms, he would have to have hobbies and not be needy. Also be happy being groom for me at horse events. And happy to drive a lorry. Oh, and a good cook.

So basically nope.

I think my DH is like a dog. Lovely, I've enjoyed having him, probably not have another once he's gone.

😂😂😂

I think my DH is also a well trained, much loved "dog".

In fairness I think he would describe me as an untrainable cat...and would not be wrong.

I have no desire to train another puppy after 20 years of marriage but think he might be amenable to having a kitten if I slinked off 😂.

Nah. I'd date but would never blend households or buy a house together. I'd want to keep my assets for my kids.

I'm sure there are blended families that work well, but gestures vaguely at the step parenting board. Seems like step mums get it in the neck coming and going.

I would if I could, but probably a woman this time around. I think if I dated men again I’d always be comparing them to my husband, even if I didn’t mean to or want to.

No. I’m not married actually but cohabiting with kids and I can hand on heart say I would never, ever live with another man again. He is away at a festival right now and things are so much more relaxed and quiet. No stompy man feet up and down the stairs, no loud farting noises, no standing in the way of every drawer I want to get in, no asking what we shall have for dinner, no moaning and loud swearing at kitchen appliances, no nagging for sex - the only interruptions, tantrums and neediness I am having to deal with is from the kids. I feel like a weight has been lifted.

He isn’t even a bad person and we have gotten to a place now, after years of arguing and negotiation, where he actually does around half the housework (minus the emotional labour obvs). it’s literally just that men take up so much space with their size and noise. They dominate and just add another level of stress 🫤

F*ck no. I want to remain on my own if DH pops his clogs. No desire to be with anyone else.

Nope, definitely not. I want all my money and assests to go to my children. I wouldn't want to be a step mum or parent other people's children. I wouldn't want someone messing my house up. I would have a boyfriend. I could go on dates and holidays with, though.

No. I'm too traumatised from the abusive men I ended up with to risk more.

I'd definitely get a dog.

I was thinking something similar. Not tiring exactly, but I think that until you know what it’s like to be long term single after an established relationship, you can’t actually know how you will feel.

I have been divorced for 6 years - and my marriage was awful. In theory I would like to meet someone and have a functional loving relationship. The thought of being alone forever sometimes makes me very sad. I am also glad that I never have to be in a dysfunctional relationship again however, and my divorce is one of the best things that has happened to me.

God no.

I think my DH is like a dog. Lovely, I've enjoyed having him, probably not have another once he's gone.

@HighlandCowbag That’s hilarious, I think I feel the same way about both DH and the dog. They’re both lovely, but I wouldn’t need replacements. 😂

I love my partner deeply and would be devastated by a death but I like being married and would likely marry again if I met someone even half as amazing as my partner is.