To think if he wanted a second date, I'd have heard by now?

[KookyUmberQuoter]

I went on a first date with a guy from an app 5 days ago. Date lasted around 2 hours, it was a walk in the park (literally, not figuratively!) and I made sure I had an easy out.

He looked a bit nervous at the start but then warmed up. It wasn't flirty but I'm someone who needs time to warm up. We had a great chat, made jokes and seemed to have lots in common.

At the end of it we just quickly hugged and said 'take care, bye!' he didn't suggest a second date or say anything about seeing me again.

I've not heard from him since. I'm possibly clutching at straws here but maybe he thought I wasn't interested? I was the one to end the date first and I didn't flirt or say anything about meeting again.
However part of me just thinks, if he'd been interested, I'd have a message by now.

I'm too scared to ask a man out again after prior rejection!

Also he still has me on the app, hasn't unmatched me (yet).

Why haven't you messaged him?

Yes. He's not that into you.

That's okay. Good on him for not stringing you along.

Good question.. I guess I'm afraid of another rejection (see my other thread if you can be bothered to read the entire thing!) and I'm subscribing to the whole, if a man likes you he'll ask you out. Whether rightly or wrongly.

Part of me has this morbid curiosity to message him just to find out?
Like, come on, hit me with your best rejection message.
Am I just weird?

Do not message him. Don't ever chase a man. If he wants you, he'll leave no room for doubt about the fact. If you chase, he might take you just because there is nothing better around at the moment.

I've been told if a man likes you, he won't care whether you ask him out? He'll even like it?

I know I'm speaking like men are one homogenous being, but as a general rule?
It makes sense really. If I liked someone, I'd be delighted if they asked me out.
I wouldn't think, eww, he asked me out/he's interested? Crush over. That would suggest some sort of issues/immaturity.

If you are both afraid of rejection then maybe it is not a good idea to try and date.

Absoloutely not.

If he can't even put in effort on day one, it will only get worse from there on out. Men know what they want and they will not let it slip them by. They will move mountains to get it. But men will waste your time until the thing they want comes by if you let them.

That's a good point.
It's just that I'm subscribing too much to this whole chase/not looking desperate thing.
There's a (very small) chance that he's sitting at home wondering the same?

Agree with @Meowzabubz.
You could message him but I don't think he's that fussed tbh. Sorry. Dating isn't easy, you have to persevere and not get too hung up on the dates that don't work out.

If you ended the date short and then not contacted him, this is on you! Why would he contact you when you cut it short with no future plans?

Differing points of view, he may well think I'm not interested, he may very well not be interested himself (likely).
I might actually message to find out and let you know .
If he's not, I literally have nothing to lose, I'll never see him again and he doesn't live in the same area.

Don’t message him. See him as a practise date. Move on and look for someone else

I'm not averse to sending a polite great to meet you text but time has gone on a bit by now for that. I wouldn't think he is interested. I think people should be polite though and say thanks but no if that is the case.

No.

Even if he's not interested, if you chase him he probably will respond. Because it strokes his ego to be chased and he might as well play around with you until something better comes along. Sex and attention from somebody you don't like is better than no sex attention. Especially when that person likes you more than you like them.

You are setting yourself up to be hurt.

I'd like to think he'd be decent enough not to but you're right, he may very well do that, he's effectively a stranger.

Why do so many people generalise about men?
Send him a message!

If he wanted to see you again he'd have been in touch.

Because they are simple creatures.

You were the one to end the walk date, so if you were interested it would have been good to have sent a simple message, e.g “Really enjoyed our walk, thanks for coming out this afternoon “

You could now send a message saying “I enjoyed xxxx park and am thinking of yyyy this weekend if you fancy it?”

If you say yourself you didn't flirt, then it could well be he didn't think you were into him.
As others keep saying, ask him out again.
If it's a no then so what, if it's a yes then lucky him, he gets to spend more time with you. And if you do get feelings don't be afraid to be flirty. Some men can be pretty dense, lol.

I'm not someone who can flirt/be intimate with someone I've just met,not judging at all anyone who is, I'm quite a shy person and sadly I think this has resulted in a couple of rejections from men in the past, they likely 'didnt feel the chemistry ' as I was a bit shy and nervous.