To think if he wanted a second date, I'd have heard by now?

[KookyUmberQuoter]

I went on a first date with a guy from an app 5 days ago. Date lasted around 2 hours, it was a walk in the park (literally, not figuratively!) and I made sure I had an easy out.

He looked a bit nervous at the start but then warmed up. It wasn't flirty but I'm someone who needs time to warm up. We had a great chat, made jokes and seemed to have lots in common.

At the end of it we just quickly hugged and said 'take care, bye!' he didn't suggest a second date or say anything about seeing me again.

I've not heard from him since. I'm possibly clutching at straws here but maybe he thought I wasn't interested? I was the one to end the date first and I didn't flirt or say anything about meeting again.
However part of me just thinks, if he'd been interested, I'd have a message by now.

Have you texted him? I'm invested in the outcome. Fingers crossed 🤞

I’m invested too! Hoping for an update

I think a walk in a park sounds like a perfect date to me! I can’t see why that would be a bad choice of first date? I’d much rather than than going out for dinner, which I find awkward and too ‘staged’ if that makes sense.

good luck op, keep us updated, but don’t be too disheartened if you don’t hear back. I’m on the side of thinking most men will move heaven and earth when they are interested… certainly always been the case in my experience. The ones I had to chase weren’t into me nearly as much as I was into them. Sad but true!

A lighthearted message to him would not go amiss, no suggesting a date, sort of hows your day/week been.

He is probably as nervous as you !!

Completely agree - though I don't think it's internalised at all, otherwise Meowzabubz wouldn't be spouting so much warped nonsense! Misandrist is, I believe, the opposite of misogynist, which is how her "advice" comes across in the sweeping generalisations about the utter ghastliness of men. I find it quite disturbing ...

If your date was 5 days ago it’s a bit odd to message now saying you had a nice time - if that happened to me I would assume the guy had been rejected by someone else in between and I was last option

I have no idea why people think women have to be so princessy, waiting around to be asked again, while men take the initiative. If you liked him and got a good vibe, message him and suggest another date. I asked my DP of 27 out for our first date.

27 years

This. 100 times over. Unless you want to do all the work in a future relationship, let it lie.

Still deciding whether to message or not..

Give it 5 more days—what I would do if I were you (speaking as someone who asked my DH out on a date).

OP just message him.

You're over thinking it.

The worst it can be is a no, that's it.

Why 5 days?

Is there anything that you chatted about on your date that you could refer to now, so that rather than asking if he's free or anything like that, could you say "Did you watch X? What did you think?" or something like that. You might know what he's thinking from his replies.

OP said it’a been 5 days. I’d leave it to Wed-Thurs, to see if he wanted to meet up for a coffee at the weekend. That would then be two weeks from the initial date. Just my personal advice; OP should do what’s best for her.

@ThatsCute thank you, 5 days seemed to be specific to me so just wondered why.

Ah just do it OP. If it's a no, it's a no. At least you'll know for sure.

No regrets!

My rule of thumb is if you have doubts about messaging then don't do it.

Just do it !!

After some light hearted banter with a woman at work nothing too serious (I was widowed she was divorced) I uummed and aayed about asking her out, so at the end of an run of mill email to her at work, I added a PS asking her out. That email spent an awful long time on my screen before I hit the enter key!

Anyway after 25 years...

If he wanted to, he would.

I'd leave it

I’m on the fence - I tend to agree that if he was interested you would know by now, but a light hearted text can’t do any harm? But if he doesn’t reply then leave it?

You've nothing to lose. If you don't like rejection, you are not in the right place to be on dating apps. I'm married but hear on here and from friends that dating today is brutal.

Ever crossed your mind he may be thinking you are not interested in him? We are in the feminism era, maybe he's waiting on you making the first move. Maybe he doesn't like rejection.

This. Life is too short.

I will be honest, OP, I’ve been out of the dating game for nearly as long as Meowz, but I have rarely come across such consistently sexist claptrap about men and women as she spouts.

Even in the early 90s that stuff was outdated caveman bollocks.