Husband thinks boob job using inheritance is dumb

[Uhjo]

I received a small inheritance from my grandmother. Dh and I have agreed a couple things it will go on ( mutually beneficial). With the remainder I said I will look into getting a breast lift. Dh has stated how much a waste he thinks this is but equally said it’s your money.

For context, I like my boobs but ONLY when they are in a bra (so that’s why dh considers it a waste). I’m 130 pounds but wear a 32 e. I just hate the way they hang. But it is easily solved by wearing bras. So I do kind of see the point. With the size of my boobs it’s not like I could wear a tight top and go braless. That’s not the goal.

I’m 31 and just want to love my entire body I guess. DH suggested I go to Turkey but I would rather stick to a UK surgeon.

We are not in debt and own our house. Of course there are loads of things that the money could go on.

Is it silly? I guess I am concerned my judgement is clouded and I am being controlled to a certain extent by an insecurity.

I know for some women a reduction is life changing.

I agree U.K. surgeon is best. Turkey is a very bad idea.

I would never ever get implants because of the risk of breast implant disease and also you’ll need to have them replaced every 10 years.

So if it’s a reduction I’d go for it. But please do stay away from implants. They are a road to nowhere but difficulties long term.

The only other thing is maybe your DH loves your boobs the way they are.

In the end though it’s your body.

Why don't you put the money in a high interest account. When you've earned enough interest for the OP, and had some counselling in the meantime, see if you still want it done!

Look it’s not a waste of money to you is it? Everything people spend money on, whether it’s Heinz baked beans rather than own brand through to a bmw rather than a corsa, is a waste of money to someone.

its your money and your body, you have to live in it for a long time, hopefully. Do your research, find a reputable surgeon and go for it. I think it will make a huge difference to how you feel about yourself. And that’s not a waste of money.

Then absolutely crack on. Your body, your money, your decision.

Breast reduction I understand perfectly well.

My friend used to get terrible back and shoulder pain from her large boobs.
Her bra straps dug grooves into her shoulders.
That cannot be comfortable day in, day out.

Prepared to be shot to flames but I had a boob job quite some time ago. Lift and augmentation (under the muscle) went for more natural look and they're really not obvious. Would just recommend not to just go with the cheapest or first surgeon you consult with. Make sure you're 100% happy. It was the 6th surgeon I saw before I was happy that he knew what I wanted and I was happy with how he performed the procedure (very little scarring as he went under the areola not the breast) obviously if its just a lift, recovery won't be as bad ( I wouldn't do it again after the 6 weeks of having to sleep sitting up, the first w weeks of pain and the not being able to exercise or lift things for a while)

So I'd always say if it makes you feel happy then do it, but be realistic for the recovery period.

It's your inheritance and you can do what you want with it and after reading some of the negative and snippy comments, I'm inclined to think there are a certain faction on mumsnet who may be just a teensy bit jealous you can do what you're planning. Good luck with your plans.

You don't have to have implants.

I had a reduction and lift 15 years ago. Never ever regretted it.

I don't think the OP means that she wants to be able to go without a bra while dressed, but that she's currently not comfortable being naked due to how her breasts look?

Anyway, my thoughts:

Just because something is done for aesthetic reasons doesn't mean it's frivolous.

I hate this idea that dissatisfaction with some aspect of your body is a mental health problem, or something that can be 'cured' with therapy. It's tied in with the attitude - which seems to somehow have become accepted wisdom - that beauty isn't real or objective, that everyone is beautiful in their own way and standards of beauty are wholly due to societal trends. Which we all know is bullshit - very young babies can differentiate conventionally attractive faces from plain ones - but somehow we're not supposed to say this anymore. It's a nonsense. Beauty is not important, but it is real.

OP's boobs sound perfectly normal, they're just not aesthetically pleasing to her in the way she would like. Getting them done may not be important in the grand scheme of things, but if she has money to spare and thinks it would make her happier, I think that's a legitimate reason in itself.

Go for it, OP.

I know a couple of people who have had breast implants. They haven’t had to have them replaced every ten years.

I think you need to be clear on what it is you want - reduction/ implants etc.

Think about whether it would actually make you feel differently.

you say you always wear a bra at home. I always thought that was normal except for in bed but I could be very wrong. But do you actually want to walk around at home without a bra. Try think about how it will impact your life to see if it’s worth it.

Are they causing you pain right now that you want to try get rid of or is just the look. If pain then definitely go for it, if it’s looks then think some more about whether it will actually make a difference before deciding if it’s worth the money

They’re your breasts and it’s your money.
Just make sure you do full in-depth research on different recommended surgeons and have initial consultations to make sure you’re on the same page.
100% agree with you that you should not go to Turkey. All operations carry an element of risk and you will be safer in this country.

Some of these replies are so utterly clueless.

A lift with small reduction in my 30s was the best money I’ve ever spent. I LOVE my new boobs. Exercise and weight loss will not improve sagging breasts. OP - go and talk to a surgeon about the process and decide if it’s for you. The “Reduction” subreddit is also invaluable in terms of what you can expect from a lift.

If you want to do it OP. Do it!!

I’m 30, and have 32 F boobs. They’re massive for my frame and gravity is already pulling them down.

When the money is there I will be getting a reduction and lift. It’s your body, your choice.

I think that if they make you really unhappy, go for it.

But it would include a reduction surely? A lift would just make them point out but the same size.

Because from what the OP says it is partly about her body issues and her disloke
of them sagging but also at her weight and height 32E could potentially give her back pain, poor posture, skin issues etc

OP I think a reduction and lift for your set of circumstances is the right health choice both for your mental/physical and emotional needs

she isn’t getting implants (which would perhaps mean I would
give different advice

32e does sound heavy for a 130lb frame. If you can afford it and are fully aware of all surgical risks, do it for your self. I’d steer well clear of cut price surgery in Turkey.

I’m torn. If you have no debt, no kids (abysmal debt stretching fuck knows how long from my experience once you factor in uni & getting them on housing ladder etc) then sure, go for it. Otherwise, look after family debt to cover all of that before even contemplating saggy tits.

Please don't go to Turkey ! Seems to be lots of things go wrong for a lot of woman there

If that's want you want them go for it. But be careful and be aware of the complications of this type of surgery that can occur.In other words go cautiously and do a bit if research. I agree. Not Turkey. Too risky.

Don't know if someone's said it already, but surely the whole point of that drawing is to show that boobs come in all shapes and sizes and to be more accepting of that. Not go 'oh god mine look like these ones and that's bad.' Obviously we all have a lot of issues we're carrying from more idealised imagery, but unless there's a medical issue, the answer is more acceptance not surgery. Because the latter won't really solve anything in the long run. If you're not happy with your body at 31, it's only gonna one way from here.

How old are you OP? This is relevant

She said 31.

If it makes you happy do it.

Have you been measured recently? If not I’d go to Bravissimo or another independent bra shop and get measured. I only say this because ac32 back on someone our weight does seem big. I wear a 32 back and I’m 50lbs heavier and a size 16 . A good bra can make all the difference and may prevent further droop .

Apologies it's in the OP- 31.

You may chance your mind about kids when your hormones start playing havoc with you at around 35. And then if you've spent the money it will be wasted.