Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Bride in need I really don't know where to turn

487 replies

ForBetterForWorseOrNot · 11/07/2024 02:18

15 years and two kids down the line into out relationship, 6 weeks until our wedding and his on about calling the whole thing off because his not happy how I haven't lost the weight he wants me to before the wedding. Apparently I have made absolutely no effort. Doesn't matter that I have organised the whole thing whilst working a full time job, learning a new role in a job I hate because he wanted me to find something that pays better.

My hen is supposed to be this weekend with my bf, his sil his dm, his eldest niece and a couple others mainly his family. Everything was fine earlier today. His said so many times how I've not lost the weight but that he loves me anyway and I know his going to marry me either way. Currently on holiday with the kids, his taken a few photos today, zoomed in on me, sent them to me this evening and resulted to silent treatment. When I asked him about it he said I've made no effort at all about my weight and that his going to message everyone saying due to unforseen circumstances the wedding is off.

Right now I'm not sure I want to marry him after this. But if he does would it be wrong to tell people exactly what's happened and tell him the house is going on the market. How can you tell your partner of 15 years she's overweight (size 16 to 18) and your calling off the wedding that's 6 weeks away to callingvher babe in the same sentence. He was literally cuddling up to me in the pub watching the England match 5 hours ago.

OP posts:
Tulipsareredvioletsarebue · 14/07/2024 14:53

PepsiMaxPerfect · 14/07/2024 10:45

The end is JUST the beginning
Do U KNOW the divorce rate
All divorces START with marriage

ARE you on GLUE?

Pelsall116 · 14/07/2024 15:40

GoogleWhacked · 14/07/2024 11:53

I still don't get what the fuck you're on about! And your shouting every second word makes it even harder to read.

By the way.... a marriage is "for life", a wedding is for 1 day.

I am glad I am not the only person who hasn't a scooby-doo what @PepsiMaxPerfect is on about; personally I am totally baffled. OP needs to run for the hills as far as I can see; who wants to be with a partner who is that shallow and obviously too far up their own backside to care two hoots about anyone else but themselves

cazcaz2 · 15/07/2024 04:32

Yes i'd say EXACTLY that to them and then i'd call off wedding myself, reclaim any monies already paid and take the kids on holiday, without him.After throwing out his stuff & changing locks of course.What a bloody loser he is.WHY would you ''love him to bits"?? He is an insulting unfeeling moron.

PepsiMaxPerfect · 15/07/2024 08:11

OP needs to run for the hills as far as I can see; who wants to be with a partner who is that shallow and obviously too far up their own backside to care two hoots about anyone else but themselves

> The end is just the beginning
Running for the hills WILL just open up a new/different can of worms & problems
(the end of problems)

Taking THOSE worms & problems somewhere else
(beginning of a new/different can of worms & problems)-

The OP just NEEDS a different screenin process - keep on running and starting again is just a cycle. NOT resolvin the actual issue, simply moving the problem somewhere else. Screen BETTER so the problem will NOT keep on happenin

Diddlyumptious · 15/07/2024 11:31

I can only imagine how hard this is for you. Please remember you are beautiful just how you are, you are stronger than you think you are, you've got this and what ever decision you make whilst so very very hard, you will be OK. Good luck

NotAnotherChuffingUsername · 15/07/2024 13:20

Tulipsareredvioletsarebue · 14/07/2024 14:53

ARE you on GLUE?

😂

PartySuziPlease · 17/07/2024 13:53

How are you ,OP? X

user1492757084 · 17/07/2024 14:07

He's not worth it. He's not treating you like he wants to love, honour and cherish you, just as you are.
Ask him to examine the marriage vows. (The old fashioned ones) Tell him he has a week to decide whether he can agree to the marriage vows and that if he can't genuinely love you fat then you will call the wedding off and put the house up for sale.

Soosi · 17/07/2024 21:52

As 1492757084 said. This is what you need to do.

Mtlso · 22/07/2024 18:21

What doesn’t kill your makes you stronger? No, being with someone like this does kill you slowly over time. Think of the frog in the pot of cold water analogy. The frog is slowly boiled alive and doesn’t realise as it’s so gradual. For the love of god please don’t marry this man. Not even if he’s a millionaire footballer.

Staringatthewalljustmeagain · 22/07/2024 18:52

He’s a cunt. Nothing about that will make you stronger.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 24/07/2024 00:41

I think he must have done this on purpose.

I can't help thinking it would be very difficult to walk down the aisle thinking of his mean comments and then stand opposite listening to him saying his vows and proclaiming his love.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page