To think a lot of men aren't that bothered about women being ultra slim?

[Voilafrancais]

From what I've seen around me, men seem to be happiest with average-sized/curvier women.

A colleague of mine is a football player and very into fitness and his girlfriend is quite overweight, they've been together 6 years.

A man I liked who is quite thin, he wasn't interested. His ex is at our workplace and is significantly overweight.

I know this sounds nasty and rude, it probably is. However I feel like on the whole men aren't that bothered about women having figures like Victoria's Secret models, and personality is more important.

I agree. My daughter is a size 4/6. She definitely has boobs and a bum. Her measurements make her an hourglass figure.

She isn't a straight up and down beanpole, she isn't bony and her ribs down stick out. She's just slim and has a small frame.

But she absolutely has curves.

(Although, I would check your bra measurement if you're wearing a 36 band and are very slim. I'm a size 12 and definitely NOT very slim nor particularly small framed and I'm a 34FF.)

Well given its highly unlikely he's fighting off queues of thin women with sticks, neither of you need to worry whether he would want one or not. As long as you find each other attractive that's all that matters. No need for him to be concerning himself with the bodies of other women who doubtless wouldn't be interested in him anyway.

Some men like curvy women, some men like slim women, just as women have preferences too. I like muscular men and others dont find them attractive at all.

Its a bit ridiculous to suggest that all men like xyz because they arent one homogenous lump, they are individuals.

Some of my friends are curvy and have adoring husbands, some of my friends are very slim and have adoring husbands. Some of my friends also have shit husbands/partners and its nothing whatsoever to do with their physical size.

This thread is totally ridiculous. Because it is an echo chamber for what I guess statistically must be the size 14+ amongst us. Which is great: I believe all women should be confident in themselves. I am not sizeist, I look down on anyone who wants to insult another woman for their size.

Yet why do we need to be confident in ourselves by writing very deliberate attacks on other women's size, to put other people down?

Let me get personal about myself. I have been a size 8-10 all my life. I am in my 40s now. I am a B cup. I am tall.

So according to you lot, I am skin and bones, and 'men' wouldn't like me. Ok, I'll take that.

yet what of my actual life experience? I have had children. I am married to someone who is (according to friends and family of course) good looking and successful in his field. I had plenty of dates with great people before marriage.

According to you lot, I should have spent my entire life on the shelf?!

Men seem to like boobs, bums and curves

Men do tend to like boobs and butts.

When I was a size 12, I got a lot of attention. I do think most men like a normal body.

Whereas men all seem to prefer women of a healthy weight or a little overweight. The biggest thing seems to be boobs, hips and bum size to them

Hourglass/ curvy figure and a pretty face gets you a very VERY long way.

And my favourite from this thread...

I mean, to be fair, if you are ever in a changing room with women of different body types, have a good look around. A thin body isn’t actually all that attractive naked. It’s the curvy women who tend to look better without clothes.

Honestly, all these comments in bold above are just designed to make this echo chamber feel better.

No one can talk about what 'men' think. Come to Kensington and Chelsea, or Mayfair, and take a look at the men in Novikov or the Bluebird, and then look at the women they are dating. They often tend to be the ones 'who aren't all that attractive naked' according to you lot. I wonder what's going on here. Do the men in Chelsea or Mayfair have 'slim pickings' (excuse the pun) and can't find any of these a-little-bit-overweight types?

I am trying to be nice, because I'm not going to fall into the trap of denigrating another woman's body type to prove my point.

However I think so much of the commentary in this thread is limited by people's (very) limited life experience.

One of Boris Johnson’s former lovers said it was like having a bin bag full of custard on top of her. Was that equally wrong or merely factual? There have been plenty of adverts focussing on men’s bodies. And plenty of women who drool over them.

(Although, I would check your bra measurement if you're wearing a 36 band and are very slim. I'm a size 12 and definitely NOT very slim nor particularly small framed and I'm a 34FF.)

Thank you! I'm quite tall (5'10") so generally have a larger rib cage hence the 36 but actually haven't had a bra fitting in years so maybe I should do that!

Purely anecdotal, but my husband is always delighted if I accidentally put on a few extra pounds. I tend to lose it anyway because I suppose deep down I am afraid of the judgments of other women and/or society at large. It’s actually a shame, because my partner’s opinion of my body should matter more than the opinion of strangers. I’m guessing there is a biological instinct driving many of us to avoid being at the bottom of the social pecking order which is perhaps stronger than our instinct to procreate. 🤔

Ah yes, not everyone is a 5'3 shortarse like me! 😅

Also, further to my comment above, I find it incredible that someone could look around a dressing room of a sports facility, and judge other women like me who are tall and slim , as "unattractive".

A thin body isn't all that attractive naked

Is my husband brainwashed then? Was Johnny Depp completely lost when he was with Vanessa Paradis or Kate Moss? Perhaps we should tell James Righton the changing room anecdote so he can shake off the spell that Keira Knightly must have put on him?

I mean, this is my point. I don't think women of my shape and size are completely invisible, or 'not all that attractive naked'.

I think we just swim in different waters, and we find different people. And that's fine - it would be crazy if the entire population was competing for a Kelly Brook, or whatever is the gold standard on this thread.

hehe! This.

No need to worry, I doubt he's fighting off all those slim women desperate for his body with a stick so I dont think you have anything to worry about 😆😂

The changing room comment was genuinely appalling.

This thread is actually quite grim. Just imagine if it was as acceptable to say overweight women look disgusting naked, as it appears to be about slender women on this thread…

Yes, you're totes right.

The world is filled with single lonely slim women who get no interest and are desperate for dates and all curvier women have long term male partners.

🙄

And what about those of us who have been slim all of our lives and have still shockingly managed to get married and have children? Did some poor man just take pity on us?

They wish they looked like Kelly Brook on this thread!

Came back to complain about the bigger women shitting on the slim women, and claiming only THEY women are “curvy” or “real” - but everyone else has it covered!

It’s sad that some people need to brainwash themselves into thinking it’s OK to be overweight because men like it, of all reasons. Maybe some slim women like keeping active and eating healthily instead of boozing, sitting around or eating pies, and don’t care what men think 🤣

People are all different sizes and frames. But don’t kid yourself that it’s good to be overweight. Sweaty, slow, and ungainly isn’t a good look, even if you have got chubby boobs you can get out for a bit of validation 🤣

Incidentally, I’ve heard some terrible men say they like their wives and girlfriends to be bigger so there’s less chance of them cheating, or so they feel grateful for having a partner. Funny how the big brigade aren’t trotting that out as a reason why their husbands love it when they put on a few pounds!

I dont care how other women view me or indeed how men view me. I'm comfortable in my own skin & being happily married the only person I want to attract is my DH. It's flattering if other men have a second look but not important. I find it very sad that many women feel threatened & jealous of each other according to how they view each others faces & bodies.

Amen to this... but sadly, as a tall, slim woman, my entire existence goes against the echo chamber on here.

I want people to feel good about themselves! But I feel like anyone who hears that from me automatically thinks I'm patronising, because my hobbies, my food preferences, and perhaps my height mean I am slim.

So much of this thread is designed to reinforce one body standard, one aesthetic. That if you are 'curvy' (what even does this mean..) you are attractive to men. If you are slim, you are not.

Of course that was a silly thing to say.

Films are full of naked slim women. I've never once looked at one and thought they were unattractive. If men didn't find them attractive, they wouldn't be so overly represented.

I think we can put that comment down to one person with issues.

However I feel like on the whole men aren't that bothered about women having figures like Victoria's Secret models, and personality is more important

It's not about being not bothered by it, it's because Victoria secret models are 1. 00000000000000000001% of the population- most women dont actually look like that in real life and 2. why on earth would boring balding Brian from accounts ever think he could realistically get a Victoria secret model in the first place?

Most people end up with partners of a similar attractiveness level to them- it's been borne out in research. Obviously, there are outliers but generally speaking its much more common for couples to be fairly well matched in their attractiveness

Agree with other pp - such a nasty thread. Almost as though if you are 'curvy' and not a size 8-10 you are not allowed to feel desirable. And that your man is just staying with you because he is invested in other ways.

Nasty nasty thread. Skinny women - with or without curves - on this thread seem to hate to think that larger women can be desirable too. Take a look at yourselves.

I'm a size 22...tall so carry it a bit better, but I have big boobs, big hips, thick thighs and a tummy.

I have NO problem with attracting blokes.

I think it's a lot to do with confidence as well. When I was very slim I had no confidence - now I have plenty of it.

I've gone from 50kg (prominent ribs, no boobs but tiny waist and great thighs) to 66kg (double chin, bingo wings, belly, thunder thighs). Husband prefers my body now. He loves the feel of my flabby bits, much more tactile and sensuous.

There used to be a stereotype that men were either a tits or arse man.

I agree with this. There is no one single attractive aesthetic. Lots of people are very attractive for different reasons and in different ways. There are probably physical types each of us find personally unattractive (and that's fine too) but what is attractive is a broad spectrum.

My son is 25 and we had a conversation a couple of years ago about what he was looking for in a woman and what he finds attractive (he's had 3 proper relationships, two were about a size 16/18 and one was about an 8).

He rattled off a list of characteristics, personality traits and interests that aligned with his and didn't mention weight or size at all. I commented on this and he said that, outside of seriously underweight and seriously overweight (to the point health etc was impacted), he didn't have a preference and that a wide range of body sizes/shapes were attractive and that it was the least important aspect of a woman.

I know that a man's opinion doesn't count but I tend to agree with him. I wouldn't want to date a very skinny man nor a very obese one either but within those parameters, I've dated a wide range of men and found them attractive.

I think the point of this thread is that men are attracted to a variety of body types and pressure to remain slim for male attraction is misguided. Not that it's better or more attractive to be fatter than thinner