ExDH new GF posting photos of children

[Pixie378]

AIBU to ask my ex to ask his GF to removed the photos of our children from Facebook?.
Her profile is public and I do not know her or anyone she knows.
I have not given permission for the photos to be put on her social media and feel that this is disrespectful.
I have asked nicely.

Depends on if you post pics of your children on social media?
TBH if their father doesn’t have an issue with it there’s not a lot you can do.

Yes I think that is fair

I think that’s fair. Others will not, but I really resent how Facebook’s default privacy settings for profile or cover photos are “Public” unless you select the audience for each post. It’s a dreadful site

I think it’s reasonable to ask her to make them private, unless neither you or your ex post your kids on social media at all, then it’s fine to ask for her to remove them.

I don’t think you can stop her posting private pics otherwise as you can’t dictate that if she is in their life, it’s similar to a non immediate family member or family friend posting them IMO.

Yanbu. I don't even let my dm post the names or pics of my dc on social media.

If their dad is happy with it then it’s not really anything to do with you I’m afraid .

Does he post photos of the kids? He has obviously given her permission to do so. If you asked for them to be removed, would they be? Or would it juts be a conversation with conflict. If you don't post your kids- I get it. But if he has given permission to do so, when the kids are with them, I don't see this as something you can win, and therefore don't see the point in making it a thing TBH

My partner has two kids. We do a LOT with them- and I don't post any pictures of them anywhere.

If I did, and partner's ex wasn't comfortable with it (regardless of my partner's views) I would remove and not repeat. The kids have two parents. Both have a say here, and I don't think you're being unreasonable.

How did you come across it, are you friends online?

Well I'm guessing he has given her permission. Its tough and I remember splitting with my children dad but on the plus side she must be proud of them, welcoming them etc and thats got to be a good thing.

Erm, yes she does. Not her kids.

If you and her dad don't post photos on SM then fair enough.

Otherwise I don't see an issue just because she doesn't have your permission, considering the kids haven't given anyone permission either.

I'd ask her to remove them but I don't have pictures of myself or my kids on social media. ExDH doesn't have pictures of the kids either.

If the dads happy and given consent all your going to do is cause grief for yourself

and if you mention it how can you justify stalking gf profile

Yanbu to ask, but there's not a lot you can do if the dad says he's happy enough.

MN is amazing at times. Schools require permission from all parents to share pictures, but a woman who may have god knows who on her own friends list is absolutely fine to share pictures of kids that aren’t her own all over social media without any vetting or opinion from their parent? It’s not like treating them to an ice cream and mum’s not happy about it - there are valid concerns here.

Are you friends with her on social media or do you know about the pictures because you decided to seek her out and have a nosey? If it's the latter I don't think approaching her is the right approach and would make you look a bit nuts and very overbearing.
In your position I would agree social media rules for pictures of your children with their dad and leave him to broach the subject with his partner.

Yes but if the dad's given permission she has parental consent to post them, so I don't think there's a lot OP can do

I agree btw - think it's dreadful and I don't think she should be allowed to post them

All these people saying if their dad is ok with it it’s nothing to do with you need to give their heads a wobble. They are your children and it is up to BOTH of you to consent to their pictures being on line. If one of you doesn’t agree, it’s a no and there is no negotiation. The girlfriend shouldn’t be doing this. Stand your ground.

The concerns are only valid if the OP says her and her child's dad don't publish photos of their DC either.

Once you publish a photo on the internet, you kiss goodbye to it forever.

And for what? So parents can bask in the glory of all the like and love hearts given to their little darlings.

Sadly that's not how the real world works. There's literally nothing the op can do to "stand her ground" if the dad disagrees with her.

That's not how the law works though. In most cases it's enough for one parent to give permission for something to happen.

I would say you can ask but assuming father his parental rights and has given permission? Personally I don’t like my kids faces in profile/cover photos as everyone can see them. So maybe speak to both father and new gf and explain this as some people don’t know this.

I agree with PP. Assuming the DCs father gave her permission, you can’t do much about it.