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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To let you all know :Jane the mntter held keir to acct, brilliantly on radio today and it's viral.

1000 replies

JaneVapeman · 28/06/2024 19:56

Unfortunately I can't link to her clip, but she's a star and a hero. She pinned him down and cut through the "twaddle". I am a swing voter and would have been proud of a mntter holding any mp to account on an important issue like Jane did. Jane is/was even trending on twitter.

💥

OP posts:
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15
LostTheMarble · 29/06/2024 08:24

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:15

@LostTheMarble no I think it actually detracts from the point, which is that we need male violence to stop. By saying 'but we can create a few female only 'safe' spaces' implies that male violence is inevitable and all we can do is shield from it.

Furthermore, I don't want men and boys to be the victims of violence either. If the male toilet isn't safe for my female child, then why is it fine for my male child?

We need radical change, beginning earlier with much more overt education. The issue is male violence, not trans people.

Of course men should simply ‘stop being violent’, but single sex spaces are more than that. It’s about female dignity, a recognition that our sex is different and have needs to accommodate that fact. A young girl on her period shouldn’t have to share toilets with males in schools or anywhere else. Share a changing room with them during PE or out shopping on a Saturday. And what about those with religious beliefs who say men and women shouldn’t share spaces? Who’s belief system should ‘win out’ in those circumstances?

Furthermore, I don't want men and boys to be the victims of violence either. If the male toilet isn't safe for my female child, then why is it fine for my male child?

Is this a serious question? Do you genuinely think males are as vulnerable to attack from other males in enclosed spaces? Or general uncomfortableness? Men attack women based on our sex, not just because they wake up one day and feel like attacking or sexually assaulting someone close by.

The issue is male violence, not trans people.

Again, you are not accepting there is a crossover in the issue. The key word is ‘male’, that is irrelevant to the trans. Not the other way around.

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:25

I don't get the dignity/privacy thing if we are divorcing that from violence. How is it undignified? Any more so than undressing in front of another 'biological woman'.

Jifmicroliquid · 29/06/2024 08:25

What did Sunak say to Brianna’s mum? I must be living under a rock.

Respectgoesbothways · 29/06/2024 08:25

AllPrincessAnneshorses · 28/06/2024 21:49

You'll get cheerleaders here. In the meantime in the real world the patriarchy are delighted some women turn on trans people as it distracts them from women's actual oppressors.
NOT any kind of heroine. Handmaiden.

In the real world TW are biological men and therefore merely a subset of the patriarchy. The actions of many trans rights activists who attempt to shut down women's voices is just one more example of patriarchal entitlement in the long history of male violence against women who disagree with them.

EasternStandard · 29/06/2024 08:26

PowerTulle · 29/06/2024 08:24

On the repetition thing, it’s actually Starmer who does this. It’s very noticeable and been picked up by some media pundits too, like the News Agents podcast I noticed.
For those following along, he’s been repeating the same phrases, quotes, anecdotes about his own past ad infinitum for weeks. No matter the context he just bends the question back to his stock phrases and moves on.
This clearly falls apart when he’s asked a direct question about his own policy and not allowed to stay on autopilot. He can’t do it, he’s utterly inept at applying the rhetoric to real life issues.

As illustrated by Jane not accepting the flannel.

Yes repetition of lines

His first response was bog standard CPS one which Jane handled brilliantly

He then switched between them

We still do not know how he intends to deal with men with GRCs other than allow access

FakeSmile · 29/06/2024 08:26

A biological man with a GRC can use biological women's spaces. Keir wants to make it easier to get a GRC, which is very concerning. It means more biological men will find it easier to get access to biological women's spaces.

Unless Keir specifically says that biological men, INCLUDING those with a GRC, will not have access to biological women's spaces, then everything coming out of his mouth on this subject is 'twaddle'.

He could very easily clear the issue up if he wanted to reassure women. He obviously doesn't want to and it's obvious why.

Mirabai · 29/06/2024 08:27

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:25

I don't get the dignity/privacy thing if we are divorcing that from violence. How is it undignified? Any more so than undressing in front of another 'biological woman'.

Unconvincingly faux-naïf.

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:28

@LostTheMarble I have absolutely no idea which changing rooms you are using in shops which are not individual rooms. Periods can be dealt with in an individual bathroom stall, as they already are?

dougalfromthemagicroundabout · 29/06/2024 08:28

FakeSmile · 29/06/2024 08:26

A biological man with a GRC can use biological women's spaces. Keir wants to make it easier to get a GRC, which is very concerning. It means more biological men will find it easier to get access to biological women's spaces.

Unless Keir specifically says that biological men, INCLUDING those with a GRC, will not have access to biological women's spaces, then everything coming out of his mouth on this subject is 'twaddle'.

He could very easily clear the issue up if he wanted to reassure women. He obviously doesn't want to and it's obvious why.

THIS. He's on the side of the man who made 26 female nurses uncomfortable and forced some of them to have to go to work in 2 sets of clothing. It's really clear.

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:31

@Mirabai It's the unwillingness to accept other people think differently from you isn't it. I mean if you really care about dignity and privacy, find an individual space. I genuinely cannot think of many spaces which have shared changing facilities (other than maybe pools, gyms, school sports) and all these places have individual rooms too...

Custardandrhubarbcrumble · 29/06/2024 08:31

I'm voting Labour, the Tories have done and will do nothing for the benefit of women. But stuff like this puts the issue in the spotlight and hopefully may make Labour realise how important it is and how many people feel strongly about it.

EasternStandard · 29/06/2024 08:32

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:31

@Mirabai It's the unwillingness to accept other people think differently from you isn't it. I mean if you really care about dignity and privacy, find an individual space. I genuinely cannot think of many spaces which have shared changing facilities (other than maybe pools, gyms, school sports) and all these places have individual rooms too...

Do you mean men should find an individual space?

Why prioritise male feelings over women and girls?

LostTheMarble · 29/06/2024 08:32

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:28

@LostTheMarble I have absolutely no idea which changing rooms you are using in shops which are not individual rooms. Periods can be dealt with in an individual bathroom stall, as they already are?

Changing rooms are open spaces, a thin curtain doesn’t negate that. You haven’t addressed the other points I have raised either.

Respectgoesbothways · 29/06/2024 08:32

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:31

@Mirabai It's the unwillingness to accept other people think differently from you isn't it. I mean if you really care about dignity and privacy, find an individual space. I genuinely cannot think of many spaces which have shared changing facilities (other than maybe pools, gyms, school sports) and all these places have individual rooms too...

Why should women have to change their behaviour to accommodate a man?

borntobequiet · 29/06/2024 08:33

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:25

I don't get the dignity/privacy thing if we are divorcing that from violence. How is it undignified? Any more so than undressing in front of another 'biological woman'.

Because transwomen are biological men, moreover they may not use medication or have had surgery (most don’t have surgery and are genitally intact men).

Mirabai · 29/06/2024 08:33

FakeSmile · 29/06/2024 08:26

A biological man with a GRC can use biological women's spaces. Keir wants to make it easier to get a GRC, which is very concerning. It means more biological men will find it easier to get access to biological women's spaces.

Unless Keir specifically says that biological men, INCLUDING those with a GRC, will not have access to biological women's spaces, then everything coming out of his mouth on this subject is 'twaddle'.

He could very easily clear the issue up if he wanted to reassure women. He obviously doesn't want to and it's obvious why.

All because a very tiny minority of genuine trans (ie mot merely using GRC) are “traumatised” without any consideration of the trauma that a far greater number of women have experienced from men.

Thankyoujane · 29/06/2024 08:33

Cheers for bringing this to my attention. Had a good think overnight and have decided I’ll no longer be voting Labour. Nor will my DH

(not that it’ll make a difference here. Polls say we’re going from Conservative to “likely Labour”)

AccidentallyWesAnderson · 29/06/2024 08:33

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:31

@Mirabai It's the unwillingness to accept other people think differently from you isn't it. I mean if you really care about dignity and privacy, find an individual space. I genuinely cannot think of many spaces which have shared changing facilities (other than maybe pools, gyms, school sports) and all these places have individual rooms too...

You 'genuinely' couldn't think of many spaces with shared changing facilities and went on to name three...

LostTheMarble · 29/06/2024 08:33

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:31

@Mirabai It's the unwillingness to accept other people think differently from you isn't it. I mean if you really care about dignity and privacy, find an individual space. I genuinely cannot think of many spaces which have shared changing facilities (other than maybe pools, gyms, school sports) and all these places have individual rooms too...

Women and girls do have individual spaces. Are you suggesting we should remove ourselves from them to appease men who shouldn’t be in there to start with?

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:34

@Respectgoesbothways well I look forward to reading about that case progressing then and being reported in a more reputable place because frankly that was extremely poor journalism.

I struggle to believe these women could not have found an alternative space to get changed if they felt uncomfortable. The sexual harassment should be reported as it would be if it happened anywhere else or by anyone else, and due procedure followed.

Mirabai · 29/06/2024 08:35

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:28

@LostTheMarble I have absolutely no idea which changing rooms you are using in shops which are not individual rooms. Periods can be dealt with in an individual bathroom stall, as they already are?

You’ve never been to a shop/gym/swimming pool with communal changing rooms? Some have a few cubicles which are often full, and some don’t.

ilovesooty · 29/06/2024 08:35

senua · 29/06/2024 08:16

Polls in fact suggest that women are likely to vote for Labour in greater numbers than men, quite significantly so in some polls.
Which is why Labour always put women's concerns to the back of the queue - they know that they have the vote whatever they do (or don't do).
Time to wake up, women. Make Labour earn that vote.

I don't need to be lectured. I've voted Labour and was quite happy to do so. People have a range of concerns and reasons for making their choices.

Perfect28 · 29/06/2024 08:36

@LostTheMarble you know perfectly well what I mean by individual places. For one person. But thanks for adding nothing to the argument.

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