Neighbour annoyed at me over her bins

[happyhippo1]

I happened to speak to my neighbour a couple of weeks ago and she mentioned that she was going on holiday and her daughter was staying at home (she looks to be late 20s).

She said to me that her daughter can be a bit lazy and not put the bin out and would I mind doing it for her. I explained that I’d add it to my list but my husband was working away, I was working in the office on the day the bins were put out so I’d be doing mine quickly and I’d have a quick check of hers while the kids were getting into the car in the morning.

anyway, I see the bin sitting outside her house on the morning of bin day so I jumped in the car and went to work.

when she came back from holiday she turned up on my door step furious that her bin hadn’t been put out. Turned out it was the neighbour’s binned positioned in front of her house.

I’d dialled off a work call to answer the door to her and I saw red tbh. I asked why her jobless daughter had a problem putting the bins out when she was sitting in the house.

she stormed off and I haven’t seen her since.

tbh I do feel a bit bad but there was a bin outside the house, unmarked with no house number. Was I to rifle through the bins for signs it was hers? Go to the door at 7am to ask the daughter if it was her bin? Enter her property to check on her bins?

why can’t people just do simple tasks?

Did you miss the bit about there already being a bin outside the neighbour's door which she naturally presumed the daughter had put out?

@Growlybear83 you do know some houses have bins at the back, so what was op supposed to do, leave her kids in the car whilst she goes to the back of the house to check. There was a bin outside, op said she'll keep an eye if the bin is already out and it was.
The neighbour is cheeky for asking when she has a useless good for nothing adult daughter sat indoors. Perhaps teach her so she isn't a lazy piece of shiz

The Force wasn't with you obvs

This is not the bin you are looking for...

This is on her and her daughter, not on you! She has raised a Lazy good for nothing child and now she is reaping the rewards! Do not feel bad this is absolutely not on you!

Some of the comments blaming the OP definitely sound like the CF neighbour is on the thread.

The OP didn’t mention the layout - why are people saying go in through the garden gate’ - what garden gate? How do you know it was a quick job.

The OP agreed to: CHECK.THE.BIN.WAS.OUT.
The OP saw a bin was outside the property. SHE.HAD.CHECKED.THE.BIN.WAS.OUT

Who on earth genuinely expects there to then be an investigation to see if said bin is THE bin.

Posters here blaming OP for something that isn’t her job…

CFs….CFs everywhere!

Yanbu op. You said you’d check the bin was out, you did that. She was bu to even ask when there is a grown adult in the house but telling you off was cf territory. My ds is 18 and occasionally forgets to do things (not often actually but sometimes). That doesn’t mean we should stop asking him!! It just means we may need to remind him more.

This whole situation is ridiculous. I couldn’t bring myself to ask a busy neighbour to do something that my own child should be doing.

Tbh I think the mother was a massive CF even asking you to get involved with the bins. Her daughter is an adult, not a child, and should be putting the bins out

No wonder we have so many young people who are completely incapable, their parents seem to have zero expectations of them

Not only that but OP doesn't even appear to be particularly friendly with them! She seems to not know much about them really.

Completely not your responsibility @happyhippo1 .

Exactly !!!!

Tell her to go and do one. Cheeky mare!
And don't do anything for her again.

You've your own life to lead, work and kids to care for. You don't need unnecessary shit on top.

You are judgemental though you don't know anything about the DD except that you've "seen her go out ".
Just because she goes out doesn't mean she doesn't I don't know, have some other issues that you wouldn't know about.
At the end of the day you said you'd put bins out & didn't. Then she got upset with you because you failed to do what you said you'd do regardless of the DD. You knew DD was staying there so if you were going to use this as a reason not to do neighbour this favour then you should never have agreed in the first place.
Don't not do what you agreed then blame other people it's not a good look

OP it wouldn’t have taken you five minutes to hammer on the door and yell through the letterbox “IS THE BIN OUT? AND HAVE YOU PUT THE RUBBISH IN IT? HAVE YOU BEEN CLEANING YOUR TEETH?”

Amazed you didn’t really.

At the end of the day the OP was doing the neighbour a favour, she saw a bin was outside the address and didn’t question it or investigate further. I am guessing most people would do the same, especially when trying to get out the door in the morning

What she didn’t deserve was that favour coming back to but her when the neighbour comes round to start harassing her. What a way to ensure that there are no favours done in the future. And if I was the OP I would be telling the other neighbours to ignore any requests unless you want a mouthful of abuse to

@Nextdoor55 OP said she would check the bin was out. She did. There was a bin outside the property. Wind yer neck in love, and get your daughter to do it next time. Or if she is so challenged to not be able to put the bin out, don’t leave her on her own.

Did you read my OP?

tiring when people don’t do the basics like read the thread (or put their bins out…)

You look a Wally when you don’t read the OP’s posts.

It really boggles my mind, the amount of people who want to argue in defence of a complete stranger (the daughter), making up whole narratives about how she’s not lazy, there must be deeper issues, based on NOTHING, and insisting that the OP is being unreasonable, especially when it’s been clearly explained she CHECKED and saw the neighbours bin outside her house. Yes it wasn’t the actual bin, but any sane person would have reached the same conclusion in this scenario.

op you’ve done nothing wrong. The amount of people blaming you for someone else’s bins not being done, when the house the bins come from HAD AN OCCUPIER AT HOME is beyond me. It’s AIBU. I think some people just like an argument sometimes and to try and put others down and make them feel shitty and “wrong”.

Exactly! If she isn't incapable of wheeling a bin out to the gate should she really be left alone in a house for a week? Maybe you could contact someone @happyhippo1 , tell them you're concerned for the adult nextdoor who appears helpless and is regularly abandoned for days on end by her angry mother.

It's your civic duty!

This thread illustrates perfectly how infantilised a generation has got. If a 20 something is capable of being unsupervised at home, they are capable of basic household tasks!

Why would you take the time to write all that but not take the time to read the OP properly?!!

Did you actually bother to read that the OP put?

There was a bin outside the house that she assumed the lazy-ar$e daughter had put out. Instead it was the neighbours bin.

Why should the OP go out of her way to help because the neighbour’s child is lazy and because the neighbour seems to allow this behaviour. Get a grip.

If she wants someone to go into that level of detail she could bloody well pay someone to do it, the stupid cow. You don't ask your neighbours for a favour then moan at them.

What an ageist comment. It's not a whole generation, it's one person.

Nah, it's more than one person. Not being able to put out a bin is a bit extreme but you only have to read a selection of threads on here to see how a lot of 20 somethings are still living at home but not expected to do anything that's a chore.

I think you have hit a nerve with some people OP. They are very quick to defend young people who don't seem to have the capability to put out a dustbin. My friend couldn't understand why she was getting so many of the neighbour's parcels until she saw a note on their front door asking them to deliver them to her! It seems the daughter (early twenties) was there but didn't like answering the door. Never mind that the doorbell disturbed my friend's sleeping baby.