Neighbour annoyed at me over her bins

[happyhippo1]

I happened to speak to my neighbour a couple of weeks ago and she mentioned that she was going on holiday and her daughter was staying at home (she looks to be late 20s).

She said to me that her daughter can be a bit lazy and not put the bin out and would I mind doing it for her. I explained that I’d add it to my list but my husband was working away, I was working in the office on the day the bins were put out so I’d be doing mine quickly and I’d have a quick check of hers while the kids were getting into the car in the morning.

anyway, I see the bin sitting outside her house on the morning of bin day so I jumped in the car and went to work.

when she came back from holiday she turned up on my door step furious that her bin hadn’t been put out. Turned out it was the neighbour’s binned positioned in front of her house.

I’d dialled off a work call to answer the door to her and I saw red tbh. I asked why her jobless daughter had a problem putting the bins out when she was sitting in the house.

she stormed off and I haven’t seen her since.

tbh I do feel a bit bad but there was a bin outside the house, unmarked with no house number. Was I to rifle through the bins for signs it was hers? Go to the door at 7am to ask the daughter if it was her bin? Enter her property to check on her bins?

why can’t people just do simple tasks?

Think your response was spot on OP.

Wow, the audacity of her to blame you and actually feel entitled to take you to task about it when her own flesh and blood is that useless. Unbelievable.

Anyone who asks someone to do a favour for them and then kicks off when it goes wrong is unreasonable.

Some people will defend their kids no matter how useless they are.

Ignore her and don't worry about it. And next time she asks for a favour because her useless daughter won't help you'll know what to tell her.

OP, I think @Growlybear83 must be your CF neighbour!

When in a hole, cease digging.

@Growlybear83 how would I have confidently identified the bin at the end of the drive with no number? Rifle through it? Go to her door and ask the daughter if she’d put the bin out? Enter her garden to check her bins?

what would you have done? 😂

Yeah I agree. I’d have said ‘yeah course I can’ and just done it. What is it a 60 second favour?

She wouldn’t have bothered knocking and asking you to do it if she didn’t need it.

@Moveoverdarlin she didn't need it. She had a perfectly capable adult there to do it. If she doesn't get that perfectly capable adult to do it that's her problem.

Sounds like you were being a bit OTT. Just say at the time - 'Have a great holiday , i wont be able to put your bins out'

It doesnt take much to run a bin out to the front. I do it all the time for our neighbours.

How do you know her daughter has no job or was busy!?

Because she’s been open about her daughter not working - I don’t think she ever has.

you're right it doesn’t take much and I’m not sure if you’re purposely misunderstanding but I checked and there was a bin there. I’ve no way to identify if that is definitely her bin but placed at the bottom of her drive I made my best guess with the time and information I had.

Well then that's fine. They probably thought that you had committed to taking the bins out. You thought it was already out. Drama over.

I suppose that when you said you 'saw red' - i can understand why she stomped off!

But why oh why would you go to someone’s door over it? Would you not speak to your daughter and demand answers from her given that she’s in the house all day?

Sounds like it’s not the fact the DD would forget but more that she is lazy and wouldn’t do it

I wouldnt!

I really dont know as i dont know this parent's situation and nor do you clearly.

She isn't really angry at you op, she is angry at herself for raising a useless lazy lump of a daughter, unfortunately she took it out on you.

@happyhippo1 - did you explain to her that you saw the bin outside her house and thought the daughter had already done it? Before you saw red and blew up?

Yeah I did say that to her first but I don’t think she was listening - just pissed off that her bin wasn’t emptied. Maybe shouldn’t have seen red but when you’re running a house, full time job, two kids and the husband is working away getting into trouble for not putting out the bin when there’s someone idle and jobless in the house rankles a bit!

I think you made a bit of a song and dance about it in the first place, you could have just said 'yes, no worries'.

She behaved badly responding to you, though.

IT'S A BIN!!! Simple - i assume it is a wheelie bin that you just walk to the end of the path.

I'm sure if her daughter was ok and able to do this then they would have much preferred to ask her than you.

Calling her - Idle, Lazy isn't nice!

In that case, entirely her being unreasonable. Does sound like she was just angry ( about her lazy daughter) rather than you specifically. I would never have flown off the handle right from the off, but would have asked calmly first, what happened. YANBU

There’s nothing wrong with her - her mother admitted to her being lazy.

It's amazing the hoops people will jump through to indulge their bone idle family and make the resulting issues, someone else's problem! Imagine having the front to ask a neighbour to do the bins because your own kid cba and not dying of embarrassment. She actually thought this was a reasonable request and that you should put yourself out so her lazy arse daughter doesn't have to!

The only mistake you made was in not telling her to give her head a wobble when she first asked.

As for her getting angry at you - she's batshit!

I wonder if your neighbours give you a bit of a swerve if that's your expectations or there is an adult child there somewhere getting it's backside wiped.That's a lot to ask of someone in a rush in the morning. Especially when there is an adult in the house.

There was a bin outside her house! Fair to assume it was her bin.

Perhaps you are mistaking the OP for Sherlock Holmes.

"Referring to himself as a "consulting detective" in his stories, Holmes is known for his proficiency with observation, deduction, forensic science and logical reasoning that borders on the fantastic, which he employs when investigating cases for a wide variety of clients, including Scotland Yard."