Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Horrible Fathers Day with DH

497 replies

WineGumm · 16/06/2024 21:01

Horrible Fathers Day morning with DH - honestly dreadful.

Last night DH and I had a fight, he had watched 4 hours of WWE on TV and I had left him alone to enjoy it. When it had finished I made a hot chocolate and went to sit on the couch. DH was taking up the whole settee with his legs on top of the couch, I asked him nicely to move his legs and he huffed that I was controlling how he sat. I just didn’t want his feet in my face. Things spiralled after he refused to move his legs and he called me “rotten”on the inside” a “vile woman” and a horrible person and I was ruining his night etc. All for asking him to move his legs! He said these things in front of DS (12)

I walked off and went to bed, I had to remove myself from the situation.

This morning I tried to act as normal possible. I wished him Happy Fathers Day. DS made him a cup of coffee (he barely looked at DS and told him he had just had one)

Got the cards and DS made a few jokey gift vouchers. DS2 had made a little present in school, his main hadn’t arrived in time, he also had a history magazine and a gift voucher.

DS went to give him the cards and he would barely look at him, saying shall we just not bother. He had a face like a slapped arse, it was dreadful. I told him to put aside whatever it was was going on and make an effort for the kids.

He started another fight and I’m ashamed to say that DS went to his room upset.

I had to convince DS to come back down and try again saying that Daddy was having a bad day.

We tried again but it was dreadful, so forced. I apologised that his main gift had not arrived, I admit that I said “please don’t shout at me” I apologised for saying that as it was probably passive aggressive and I said please don’t be upset.

DH looked at the little pile saying that there was barely anything there.

DS stormed upstairs again. I had to go to work.

I text DH to see if he would at least take the kids out to the park as the weather was lovely but he refused. I even sent him free McDonald’s vouchers so he could take him to a drive through but he refused to attempt to salvage the day.

DS stayed in his room all day, DS2 amused himself and DH played video games all day.

Its 9pm and the cards are still unopened 😔

If it wasn’t Fathers Day I swear I would have asked for a divorce today.

OP posts:
Penguinfeet24 · 16/06/2024 21:04

I'd ask for a divorce anyway frankly, what an utter arsewipe.

WineGumm · 16/06/2024 21:04

I’ve been fantasising about leaving him all day.

OP posts:
BeardedLodger · 16/06/2024 21:05

Your poor boys.

Idtotallybangdreamoftheendlessnotgonnalie · 16/06/2024 21:05

Wow he sounds like a right prince. Bet your kids wish they could divorce him too!

Fivebyfive2 · 16/06/2024 21:06

Don't let the name of the day stop you op - get a divorce asap. He sounds absolutely vile, your poor kids!

shellyleppard · 16/06/2024 21:06

What an ungrateful bast*!!!!! I would be looking for a divorce too op. How horrible for your children

Smithhy · 16/06/2024 21:07

It sounds like your poor relationship is impacting your children’s welfare.

HAF1119 · 16/06/2024 21:07

Can you imagine if your children had hand made you cards, done you a coffee, came to say happy Mother's Day and you just ruined it all because you're in a huff? Didn't say thank you to the children for the effort they made, and left the cards unopened all day?

Your children.. who you love and care about who made an effort to make you feel special?

No... for most people the thought of doing that to their children would make them feel sick.

Take it as a wake up call unless this is hugely hugely out of character. Your children shouldn't have that as a role model and you all deserve better than that

SweetFemaleAttitude · 16/06/2024 21:07

What a horrible weaseley little cunt.

Fuck him off.

Why put your kid and yourself through this

Woahtherehoney · 16/06/2024 21:07

Please don’t expose your boys to anymore of this controlling and manipulative behaviour.

UghFletcher · 16/06/2024 21:07

Ungrateful twat. His gift can be the divorce

LemonCitron · 16/06/2024 21:08

He sounds like a complete twat OP.

Sandsnake · 16/06/2024 21:08

Ask for a divorce today, or at least start to plan for it. Seriously. I wouldn’t usually jump in to say that but this isn’t just a couple of irrational hours he’s had, it’s a whole day of punishing his children in order to make a point to his wife. It’s the kind of horrible thing that your children will remember forever (sorry). However, it’s not too late for you too show them that you will not tolerate them being treated like that - and also to show them that it is an unacceptable way for a man to behave.

I’m really sorry, by the way, sounds horrible. Virtual hugs xx

NeverDropYourMooncup · 16/06/2024 21:09

YABVU. For not telling him you want a divorce.

tessdurbyfield · 16/06/2024 21:09

Your poor poor boys. It's often said that when a relationship breaks down, the father can show contempt for his own children. It's disgusting. Present him with divorce papers tomorrow. Unless he's a gem the rest of the time and this is utterly out of character I would not be able to forgive this treatment of my kids

NotTerfNorCis · 16/06/2024 21:09

What a knob. He's either having issues or he's a bellend. If you can't get to the bottom of what might be the matter with him, time to consider a split.

Chickenuggetsticks · 16/06/2024 21:10

He’s fucking horrible, he’s making your home life horrible too.

AppleKatie · 16/06/2024 21:10

‘His main present’ for Father’s Day? The mind boggles.

what. A. Twat.

What kind of dick doesn’t open cards from their kids and say thank you?

I couldn’t be married to him- his behaviour is so far from normal if this is his normal I couldn’t do it.

Fridgetapas · 16/06/2024 21:10

Why was he being so unkind to your poor boys?? I don’t understand what kind of dad would do that.
You need to give him a few home truths OP.

IOYOYO · 16/06/2024 21:11

Bloody hell op that sounds horrendous, I’m so sorry. If you think this is part of a wider issue and you don’t want to be with him anymore, maybe this is your jumping off point. Have a think about what you really want - for you and your boys - and what your next steps could be. I’m sending love - what a fucking shitty day you’ve had.

WineGumm · 16/06/2024 21:11

HAF1119 · 16/06/2024 21:07

Can you imagine if your children had hand made you cards, done you a coffee, came to say happy Mother's Day and you just ruined it all because you're in a huff? Didn't say thank you to the children for the effort they made, and left the cards unopened all day?

Your children.. who you love and care about who made an effort to make you feel special?

No... for most people the thought of doing that to their children would make them feel sick.

Take it as a wake up call unless this is hugely hugely out of character. Your children shouldn't have that as a role model and you all deserve better than that

That’s what I said to him. Told him that there is no way, if my children had come to me with homemade gifts and cards that I would refuse to open them or have a face on the whole time.

DS even said he didn’t want to give the cards to DH as his reaction would be “fake” 😔

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 16/06/2024 21:11

Tell him you want a divorce, he's nasty and unkind to your sons
Poor kids

Moonpie6 · 16/06/2024 21:12

Well I applaud you for not asking for the divorce because I would have.

What a horror. I hope you and your boys are OK.

I would get his bags packed and divorce papers out ASAP.

CoastalCalm · 16/06/2024 21:12

Do you really want your sons to grow up thinking that is how a man behaves towards his wife and children , have some self respect and tell him to fuck off

pinkfondu · 16/06/2024 21:12

WineGumm · 16/06/2024 21:04

I’ve been fantasising about leaving him all day.

Because it's not just this weekend is it?