Colleague has sent me a dick pic

[Iambetteroffsingle]

Well not a completely full-frontal one, he is clothed on it but it's a picture of his 'hard-on'. (Sorry this is TMI)

I vaguely knew of him before and we went on a team-building weekend activity as a group. Got on well, stayed in touch a bit over the last week via text, just talking about work and holidays mainly.
There's been no flirting or innuendos of any sort, then I opened my phone to this.
The man is 41 FFS.
He's put a caption in the picture talking about his 'tan' but I'm not stupid, I know what a lot of men are like.

If this were out of work I'd block straightaway, but I feel so awkward with working together. We aren't in the same team but have mutual friends. I just don't know what to do.

I was slightly interested before and would've been open to a date or something similar but this has shown me what he thinks of me.

Yeah the boundary pushing mentioned above is so disrespectful and such a marker of the man he is. He’s showing you no respect and he obviously thinks he’s above reproach, posting such a photo to his colleague! Zero fucks given to how inappropriate his actions are. What a narcissistic asshole. I hope you report him. You’re NOT jeopardising his career by reporting him! HE is!! He’s jeopardising his career by behaving like an arrogant assclown.

Why not? He's jeopardised his own career

It's not anything you've done, it's a natural consequence

Send a dick pic to a colleague = HR get informed

The very definition of fuck around, find out.

Why do women have to put up with this shit?

What normal woman would welcome a dick pic??? It’s a power play. It’s absolutely disgusting.

id report to hr. Or if you don’t want to jeopardise his career (although he’s obviously not that bothered, what a stupid arse) ask your manager for advice.

i mean, wtf was he thinking you’d say?

Screenshot for proof. Block and ignore so he won’t send anything else.

He’s jeopardising his own career.

I’d report him. Creepy bastard.

Thank you everyone. I struggle with boundaries with men but I in no shape or form flirted with him or said anything suggestive, and I guess even if I did, it doesn't warrant this.
A couple of my teammates are good friends with him.
I'll have a think of what to do, maybe I should send a laughing emoji with a magnifying glass?

I voted YABU because of "I just don't know what to do".

Yes you do.

Just do it.

Eww. Sorry for you. I think it’s ok to block him. If in time there’s a work reason why you need contact and he’s stopped being gross, you can unblock then. If you don’t want to go to HR, then sending him the right message by just blocking him and not engaging is the best thing you can do.

I'll have a think of what to do, maybe I should send a laughing emoji with a magnifying glass?

Yes, do this.

That'll really open up the bantz 🙄

Or you could just be professional and report him.

I would screenshot then block. Not sure if report to HR immediately as I don’t like fuss but I would keep the evidence. Blocking sends him the message you found it gross

i wouldn’t play along with emojis / laughing / magnifying glasses. That sends the message it’s all a big laugh. Just coldly block

No. He’d consider that flirting. He’d ask you what you meant, are you looking at that, want to see in real life etc. Block and don’t respond ever again.

I agree don't banter with him.

Say this is really inappropriate and block and report

Do not reply with any laughing emoji’s!!!

just don’t reply. You don’t want to encourage any further interaction. Please block him.

Don’t reply. There is nothing that you can say that is appropriate in the circumstances. Definitely don’t make light of it. Screenshot and report to your manager on your next working day. Also block him.

Don't respond, just block.

Send him this

https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2003/21/section/127

Then block

Don't make a joke of it. I'd just type 'inappropriate, blocking' and then do it, if you don't want to make a fuss. (i get that)

urgh - sleazy bastard

Report to HR, or just block him and hold the threat of reporting him to HR over his head

The magnifying glass is a bad way to go. It will encourage him.

you need to find a better response or this will escalate

Yeah true was a bad idea. It's going to be very awkward at work. Thankfully ive had a job offer to leave, it's just in the CS so everything takes a million years.

Report, report, report. Definitely don't send back childish emojis. Individuals as vile as this one will interpret that as permission.

Worrying about the impact on his career is how so many men get away with this. He has even tried to cover his back with the tan comments so if you do go to HR he has a défense.

I think you should report him. If it impacts his career that was his own doing. Men can't be allowed to get away with this

I honestly dont know why any man, let alone a semi intelligent one of that age would find this acceptable behaviour.

How old are you OP? I'm assuming much younger?

I wouldn't engage with any emojis or magnifying glass! I'd keep evidence and block, and go to HR if any other issues. Ideally, I'd go to HR now, but I see you are reticent to do so.

No don’t send the laughing emoji or the magnifying glass. That will spur him onto thinking it’s ‘banter’

Id either pull him up and say you don’t appreciate the picture and hope that he doesn’t send unsolicited images to others or I would report to hr.

Report, you have no idea what he might have done previously, protect yourself and others