Big bust up over holiday, but who's unreasonable about DC?

[on103]

We are due to go on holiday in a couple of weeks. Me, H, our DC and H's older DC.

He is self employed and it's the root cause of 99% of our issues. I am aware how difficult it can be but he absolutely uses it as an excuse to get out of certain aspects of family life. He is a workaholic imo.

Something has "cropped up" and he is now making noises about not being able to make the holiday. I'm so furious. I don't even know why I'm surprised. We have had a big argument about it with him saying I don't appreciate how hard he works (as if I don't) and me feeling like he never makes time for us. It will be the first holiday we've had as a family in years.

He has "kindly" suggested that I go by myself with DC which I've said don't worry I will be. However he was shocked when I said he could break to DSC that there wasn't a holiday anymore.

He seems to think he can duck out but I'll just go off with all the kids and leave him free for a week. I have said absolutely not. I'm going with DC but I am not going to take DSC too and let him duck out of his responsibilities. He can stay if he wants but he'll have to be the one to let them down.

I'm half minded to just never come back as it is!

Who is being unreasonable? (Aside from DH being a twat in general)...

Me for saying I'm not taking all the kids alone

Or DH for expecting me to just fuck off for a week with all the kids so he can work.

I hope he looks back later in life and wonders was it all worth it. I can't see him being an involved non resident parent to your child if you do end up separating . That comes with lifetime of consequences.
I've never heard of anyone on their deathbed wishing they'd got a few more months of work in. So sad.

I'm talking about posters on here who think it's perfectly acceptable for him to be in a different country to his children on his access time. And somehow blaming OP for having a problem with it

Your DH's ex is right to not care what he does during his access time. She can't dictate what he does. She also shouldn't feel the need to keep the children with her if he decides to not see them.

The point people are making here is that OP shouldn't take on responsibility for his access to his children. The point people were making was that HE is the one at fault here. Nobody else. Not his ex, not OP.

I'm wondering how many women would book a family holiday and then decide to stay back to work and send her children off with their stepdad instead?

What happened when you got back @on103 ?