Women with rich husbands looking down noses at others

[Ifyouholdonforonemoreday]

It bugs me!

I live in a v wealthy area, lots of mum friends of mine don’t work, lovely people, husbands earn enough, fantastic situation I’d do the same (I work part time) but many other women who don’t work, days spent lunching, playing padel, getting nails done, yoga and so on…but just really up their own bums, very snooty and looking down at others. Have to admit it annoys me, it’s not their money, they didn’t earn it, why act like that? They could lose it all tomorrow, anyones circumstances could change..just eurgh

How do you know what memories they have or don’t have if you’ve never worked full time with babies/toddlers?

Because it’s impossible to be there when you are not.

I work FT and have many wonderful memories of time spent with DC.

Weird.

But housekeeping is a job, cleaners, personal chefs. Childcare too.

Course. Evenings and weekends.

Mornings
maternity leave
annual leave
holidays
My days to pick DC up early from nursery

Lots of time to make memories.

I think you need to reframe your thinking OP.

The only thing that is true is that some people are arseholes and some people are not.

This.

I was a sahm for years when we weren’t so well off (obviously we managed fine). Now dh earns very well and I work, although I don’t need to. We’re still the same people even though our circumstances have changed.

I don’t worry that dh is going to run off with a younger model now that he drives flash cars. And I know that whether I work or not makes no difference to how much he values my contribution. He certainly doesn’t expect me to have my nails or hair done and is well used to me pottering around in my comfies.

To be honest, most of the wealthy people I’ve met have been lovely. People who don’t actually have a great deal but want people to thin that they do tend to be the ones with airs and graces.

I know the type you mean, OP. I am friends with one couple for 20+ years (went to the uni with the husband), and it became increasingly unbearable to have the attitude from his wife as we progressed in our careers, but she was a stay-at-home wife / mother. We do similar jobs and earn similar, but you'd think it is her main objective in any discussion we have to highlight how better is it to have a man bringing in ££££.

"Ewww, I am not a farm horse to work, I am a woman", "Well, if that's your thing, of course, but I'd literally DIE of boredom if some snotty manager told me what to do every day", "Well, i understand some women might have to work, but is there really no other choice, you're not a third world peasant" - things like that.

I stopped close contact with them now - he has repeatedly asked her to look for a job now that the children are at college / university, and apparently it is all my fault for giving wrong ideas.

@doeeyedstan Because you were arguing that women with kids at home were "working". But you no longer have children because they are all adults and still don't have a job?

@doeeyedstan your long essays and need to rebut every single opposing view point with your perfect life and 'good egg' high earning husband. That may very well be true in your eyes but I still think you protest too much.

If you were secure, you would not need to do this.

Ha. My youngest has just turned 18. I've been out of the market for 30 years (so clearly I am approaching 60) I have zero need to work for financial reasons. My dh now works as and when as described previously so we are enjoying a lot of fun time together. Why is the name of all God's would I go and get some random job 😂. It wouldn't fulfil anything missing in me and I'm certainly not doing it to satisfy some random person in MN 🤪

I fully understand that you have to justify your choices. But you have doubted my claims, perhaps because I am a woman and in your world women don’t earn money, and I find that insulting.

Orrrrrr maybe I'm in bed with a wee virus and a teeny bit bored so I have graced you with more of my time than I normally would have to spare 😁. Boredom is incredible for getting me chatting online

@Angrymum22
😂😂😂
Good grief. Now you are getting desperate

I fully understand that you have to justify your choices. But you have doubted my claims, perhaps because I am a woman and in your world women don’t earn money, and I find that insulting.
Nowhere in anything I have posted have I said women don't or shouldn't earn money. Now you are just being funny 😂

Well done @Angrymum22 You are an inspiration of what women can achieve outside of the domestic sphere. So great that we have the choice in the UK.

No need to justify why you have so much time. We know you do. Yesterday it was caffeine and today it is a cold and boredom. We are so lucky to be graced with your presence and lifestyle 😂

@Angrymum22

You are being particularly hilarious because you are so hell bent on some weird 'winning' idea. That you keep contradicting yourself.

For someone claiming that there is nothing wrong with being a SAHM, you certainly were not putting out that impression on this thread…

I like to think that it is because they are intimidated by a woman who probably earns as much as their DH.
Ooooo ya think so??? Them simple intimidated housewives.

Maybe working and paying tax would be a more noble way of supporting the great unwashed. Married couples stopped being taxed together decades ago. So rather than voting why not actually contribute financially like a proper socialist
Because only by earning pay would there be any possibility of being noble 😅

I think that what the OP is trying to convey is that SAHM are particularly smug at times
Something you clearly agree with huh? Otherwise you wouldn't have shared this little nugget.

You even admit to finding it hard to be comfortable with your own DH staying home…

I didn’t think it would bother me but when DH (SAHP) would swan off to watch cricket or play golf it did annoy me.
But yeah go you 🙌🏼 supporting all those parents or non parents who for whatever reasons are not working in paid employment!

“The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”

@blueshoes aren't ya just ! It just eats you up doesn't it.

I think I'm possibly going to leave now as I'm finding a little too much pleasure in seeing angry, bitter, resentful people tying themselves up in knots over someone who has on many levels got dealt an easier hand than them.

I feel I shouldn't find it quite as entertaining as I do as you and one or two others are clearly feeling undervalued and under appreciated and it's eating you up.

👏👏

I really hope those on here that are literally angry at happy people find some way to reconcile themselves with whatever it is that is bugging them. It's not good for you or your families or just people in general to be carrying this sort of resentment. There is no judgement from me towards people working or not working. Richer than me or poorer than me. I have no need to try and find ways to demonstrate that anyone else is losing at life. I don't fear fellow non working women are escorts or lying down enduring sex or have dh who shag young interns or have unfulfilled and vacuous lives or are feckless and lazy. The diatribe pumped out here would be funny except it shows the deep level of discontent in posters who HAVE to believe this sort of thing. They need to. It kills them to think that there are rich women enjoying fabulous lives with nice dh who aren't shagging junior associates 😂. Dear lord. Is that the sort of thing you worry about? No wonder you are resentful. Otherwise they have to accept that people who make different choices sometimes have glorious lives 🤷🏻‍♀️

This.

They should keep their heads down and remember the fact that they're just spongers.

@blueshoes aren't ya just ! It just eats you up doesn't it.

@doeeyedstan it does tickle me how you insist that I am being consumed with envy and bitterness at your unbelievably fortuitous lifestyle. That is the usual trope of levelled at women who work in paid employment - how they must envy the SAHM who does not need to work.

Sounds more like you are convincing yourself that your life is enviable. Enjoy the rest of it

Gosh how does 2+2 become 5?

You sure do a good line in projection, misguided extrapolation and frankly wishful thinking.