Eww just found out my fiance voted UKIP before

[NotGotAClue1]

Just that really. And the fact that he likes Nigel Farage and agrees with him. I feel very disturbed.

yep. exactly this

@Scruffily wow he must have a lot of "mates" to have come 4th! You make my point for me.

Look you can't be that bothered about political stance or his views are not that skewed or misaligned with your own as you've got so far down the line if having a child and getting engaged before finding out. Let it go or have a conversation with him on where you both stand on issues

I was wondering that, but then I reminded myself that most people aren't politics geeks like me and that in a lot of households, it's barely spoken about.

I've never knowingly so much as snogged a Tory, let alone got into a relationship with one. I couldn't be with someone whose values are so diametrically opposed to mine.

Yep. Exactly this, refusing to accept other peoples views, believing their beliefs are far superior to anyone else's, labelling other people who disagree. It's insane. My husband votes Labour, or he did, he says he won't this time. I haven't voted Labour since 2001. We get along enormously, have fantastic energetic debates, disagree on something's agree on others and I love him for it.

One might argue that Cameron called the Brexit vote to appease the Eurosceptics in his own party rather than UKIP's diligent and dogged campaigning on the subject.

But either way UKIP aren't a mainstream party and in 2019 they finished behind the Monster Raving Loony party. Even in their glory days of 2015 they only had just over 10% of the vote and 1 seat in parliament.

Farage might have plenty of aspiration but he is hardly a man of great success. He has stood for election 7 times and never managed to win. Perhaps it will be 8 times lucky and he'll win Clacton for Reform. If he does, I hope it works out for everyone living there as it's certainly an area that needs an proactive MP to tackle local issues.

I've had precious few conversations with people who like Farage and/or support Brexit, but with the exception of my MIL, every one of them has been a racist.

MIL voting for Brexit was a real shock. She's always voted Labour and isn't racist. She told us that she didn't like "the Germans telling us what to do after we beat them in the war". DP was so gobsmacked that he wondered if she was getting dementia, it was so out of character.

It really wouldn't bother me at all. He could have voted for them, for various reasons.

Deal breaker for me.

There's a difference between not writing people off and spending the rest of your life with them.

Grumpy, racist, verbally abusive gammon? Um, I'll pass thanks.

Think think common norms and values are very important in a relationship. I couldn't date someone who votes ukip but I wouldn't date someone who voted conservative either. Our values don't align. I'd get sick in my stomach.

It sounds like your relationship is on the way out regardless. I know it's hard to leave when you have children. However, I wonder if it's better to do it when they are younger rather than waiting.

Yeah tbh i would be repulsed if i found out a love interest was a labour voter!

I don’t care who my partner or anyone I know votes for. If we all voted the same it would be a communist society. It’s good we all have different political views to then find some middle ground. This is someone you’ve agreed to marry and now because of one comment you don’t like him.

Ive never voted in my life i dont think i have.

I also agree. If my husband voted Tory we would have to have some serious conversations!

I don't know how I would get over that but I knew my husband well enough for something like that not to have been a surprise.

Well, you’ll have to educate me as to how they are racist. Because in my mind they are not.

And equally, my own family is not white, well not all of us are. I have much loved family members of East Asian and Caribbean descent and appearance. I can assure you that I am not racist. And interesting my family are fairly aligned politically. So I guess you’ll be calling them racist too. It’s quite laughable.

‘Racist’ has simply become a term very silly people call someone else, whose beliefs and opinions don’t align with their own.

I am going to be honest with you. I have found that most of the people who vote for parties as ‘they are the most ‘kind and caring’ are quite the worse I have ever befriended. They could have voted Reform and I would have understood. Does your fiancée is a genuine nice person and caring? A good father and not a thug? That is most telling than the party he is voting or voted for.

Exactly! It is bloody ridiculous and so tiresome. Yawn!🥱

But who they vote for reflects what they believe, and middle ground can't always be found. I wouldn't want to be with someone who was homophobic, and believed being gay should be illegal, for example, I don't see what middle ground there could be there.

Politically I couldn't be with someone who supported the BNP - they are fascists, I would have to assume if someone were voting for them that they believe their views to be acceptable. I couldn't live with that person, couldn't live with a person, who, when we had anti-migrant graffiti near us would be agreeing with it - and possibly responsible for it - while I'm phoning the council to complain.

You don't see the irony of your post do you.

If that's how you feel, then how can you argue against the below:

"Very proud not to tolerate homosexuality and degeneracy. Better to be "closed-minded" like that than to be a moral vacuum that insists those views have to be respected."

My politician views are very much a part of who I am. Having such opposite views to me would be a deal breaker for me. It doesn't have to be for everyone, but for me it would be.

Quite. Im learning quite a lot about which voters actually promote tolerance and I’m not going to lie, I’m scared for the future.

Some of the attitudes shown on this thread…I can see how communist governments are able to police speech and even thought. There are so many people chomping at the bit to shut down discussion.

Perhaps that is why op’s partner is turning to a party that isn’t promoting that kind of rhetoric? Maybe he’s the better person?

Op returned to tell us how aggressive and awful he is, with an aim to conflate his ‘personality’ with his political leanings. There are many horrible people in this world and I can promise you some are Labour voters, Lib Dem’s, Greens etc and yes, some will be Conservatives or Reform voters. You can be a complete fool from any political persuasion.

Op, should you dump a partner based on a Nigel Farage vote - it’s up to you, but I think that’s ridiculous.

Should you dump an aggressive and mean partner who treats you with a lack of respect. Obviously.

His thought process would be so different to mine, l don’t think l could handle it as it would impact on every day life. It shows he doesn’t mind being lied to though.