To sleep with a 23 year old?

[Possomoppossum]

Given that I am 42,he knows full well how old I am,we met on a dating site where he wanted to meet older women.ok or creepy age gap?

Why does that bother you? 😂

If my adult son was with a woman my age I would certainly find it creepy. Most parents wouldn't want their early twenties daughter seeing a man in his forties either.

The 'rule' is arbitrary shit. There is no rule. You're both adults, OP. It's up to you.

He's old enough to make his own mind up so why not

I find anything beyond a 15yr age gap quite grim tbh.

He's in it entirely for sex.

Specifically for sex with a 'milf"/older woman.

You are 99.9% likely to be considered "invalid" for anything else.

He may be projecting any number of not particularly flattering cliches onto you (horny, desperate, up for it, nympho, "dirty" etc.). Just remember there's no people more ageist than young people, and I tend to find men even more so).

If he tells his mates, it will be viewed by them as much with derogatory humour as anything else.

If you're ok with that, go ahead.

I personally couldn’t as I have a son that age. ( I wouldn’t anyway as way too young for me )
But you’re both consenting adults so up to you.

Yuck

I'm 43 and my eldest is 24, I cannot imagine shagging any of their mates or even finding them remotely attractive.

Eh. He is 23 so he is old enough for it not to be awful. As long as it is clear to everyone that it is a casual relationship, it is fine.

if you are looking for anything remotely serious, or lasting, I think there is too much risk of you taking advantage of him.

Age gap relationships is my hill to die on. Hate them. Would be horrified if my young adult kids were in one. I cannot even imagine fancying someone so much younger. It’s legal but horrible in every way.

If you want to, crack on.

I met my DP when I was 39 and he was 24. He's now 30, I'm 45 and this year we actually hit the at least "half your age plus 7" 🤣.

We have the best life together. Noone even notices the age gap because he's greying at the temples and I look younger than my age. Plus we are into the same things, have the sane sense of humour, and laugh all the time. Our home is joyous.

If I'd listened to those who say it's creepy I'd have missed out on an amazing relationship.

Do what makes YOU happy, whether that's just sex, or more. Sod everyone else.

@Jennyathemall noooo but each to their own really, I’m not in a place where I’d be thinking about sex with anyone let alone my sons friends (and some are very handsome) made me laugh though 😄

23?

No.

Who is he, Wayne Rooney?

Creepy as fuck but you crack on if it makes you happy.

Not really sure why you're asking Mumsnet.

Nothing wrong with it, but you'll find that it's one of the most offensive crimes you could commit on MN. 😂
Don't worry about people judging, let them get their knickers in a twist, you're both consenting adults.

Just because it is legal does not make it good.

I have a 23 year old. Yes it’s creepy!

If you were a man there would be uproar.

we met on a dating site where he wanted to meet older woman

A site where you were actively seeking a big age gap?

You wouldn't have made this thread if you were actually 100% happy with the situation.

I'd find it gross, yes you can find younger people attractive but I don't agree with acting on it. Having sex with anyone who was born when you were already an adult is just gross whichever way around the sexes are and someone's taking advantage of someone.

What happens if you unexpectedly get pregnant? Contraception failures are relatively common, you miss a couple of periods and put it down to peri and 9 months later you have a baby and stuck with the 23 year old for another 18 years - catastrophising a little bit but not a situation I'd want to be in.

I find it interesting that a lot of people answering are around my age (40s) but with adult children in their 20s.

My dd was 7 when I met DP. Perhaps people who have children younger feel older sooner? I can't imagine being the parent of a 20 something person - in my head I'm not old enough. So I don't see people in their 20s as 'YETBLS' as per Bridget Jones. (I am old enough for that).

I know some of my peers are grandparents and I'm definitely NOT even vaguely ready for that.

I've thread this exact thread so so many times now. Op just do it if you want. why ask on here for validation? i wouldn't and lots of people wouldn't, but we wouldn't also start a thread about it. You obviously want to

there was a tv show similar called cougar town i believe, seems there have been cougars for many years, even the films American pie films had the older woman etc

I am 41. When I was 39 I had sex with a guy that was 29 and he was so so so immature. The way he texted put me right off. I wouldn’t go lower than 35, he’ll be a crap shag, he’ll say ‘ye’ instead of yes and probably be into music you hate. What’s the point?

Omg please sleep with him you will love it not creepy at all live your life