AIBU to wish that there was dedicated housing for quiet people?

[NoMoreNoisePlease]

I’m Autistic(Diagnosed) and I’ve never been a fan of noise but I’m becoming increasingly noise averse as I’m approaching middle age.

I don’t expect complete silence and I actively enjoy hearing two of my neighbours’ children play and having fun but some others seem to spend 3/4 of their time screaming. Why do so many children seem to scream now?

Plus there’s the thump of footballs, rusty trampoline springs, people playing loud music, fireworks and so many other loud intrusive noises.

I want to get away from it all but moving rurally(I’m semi rural) isn’t really the best option for me due to disabilities.

I think that I’m going to have to move to an over 50s complex as soon as I’m old enough. Though I fear the blaring televisions.

AIBU to wish that there was specific housing for quiet noise averse people like me?

Meh, I lived there for seven years. During the day, didn't find it any quieter, in general, than anywhere else I've lived. Depending on your building, yes, they'll enforce evening quiet hours but that didn't stop the kid in the flat above me from running around. It was also annoying that "quiet" hours matched the lower-cost energy hours (so you could never run your dishwasher/clothes washer during lower-cost hours). And, yes, many neighbourhoods would enforce no mowing lawn on Sundays - but you could during the daytime at any other point in the week.

I had 2 autistic, extremely noise sensitive flatmates who couldn't live with each other. This idea would never work out!

I had 2 autistic, extremely noise sensitive flatmates who couldn't live with each other. This idea would never work out!

You’d have your own space. No apartment sharing unless you wanted to do so/are already doing so but it would require people who both love quiet and are quiet. It wouldn’t just be for people who only quiet but make a lot of noise themselves.

That said life with neighbours is never going to be perfect and it’s far from it in the situation that most of us currently live in so I’m not sure why this type of setup would be expected to be so but it’d certainly help many of us to reduce noise.

I might have to move to Nairn when I’m old enough.

Of course they have their own space, but like you they both think they are quiet and it's everyone else in the world that's noisy.

They're not quiet! Sound travels and everyone also has specific different triggers.

Plus the problem is autistic people (I am so sorry but being honest – I am ND myself though in a different way) are not famed for self awareness or excellent interpersonal conflict resolution, so this also leads to a tricky situation.

For me it's about people being quiet between 10pm and 7am. That's really all I want my neighbours to do.

DH says that's not right, people are allowed to have friends over say between 8pm till 2am (leaving in a taxi to go home) at a weekend to socialise. He says just because I like silence doesn't mean others need to live that way.

Next door like socialising but they are up till wee small hours then waste a whole Sunday because they are too hung over to do anything. Whereas I am raring to go around 8am/9am to get my garden done on a Sunday but due to the stress of not getting sleep I need I am too exhausted. They are so bloody loud. It's the loud laughing, often very fake laughter. It's not that funny!

To be fair they don't play loud music, it's just their loud voices. You don't need to shout - just talk normally!😣

I don't complain on Auld Year's Night when they had a massive party, its completely normal. Everyone celebrates it. I let it go for one night.

But it's the rest of the year. I have genuinely felt suicidal not getting the rest I need. My bedroom is next to the party wall where their living room is unfortunately.

It wouldn’t just be for autistic people and yes some of us are genuinely quiet people(For a start I never play music without headphones, TV is always very low and I often use headphones, and doesn’t go on often, I have no vocal stims I live alone and never have parties) and again nothing will ever be 100% perfect(We still have to clean and do the washing) neither is living in the situation that most of us do with neighbours, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t try to improve.

I just read about Firhall. Sign me up. It sounds great.

Ok I apologise if people think it was harsh.

@Aussieland I don't think they can do anything as it's just children's noise I've been told

Good thick walls would make such a difference too. I live in a new build and the walls are great. I never hear my neighbours unless they’re literally drilling on the adjoining wall. I don’t hear a single thing that they do including their delightful 3 year old(Not sarcasm as she really is lovely)

Of course it doesn’t stop the outside noise but it does make a real difference to my quality of life(And theirs I’m sure)

Wow buffyslayer that is truly awful.

I'd love that, but I don't trust people's own assessment of how quiet they are. I imagine a lot of noisy people would end up in such places.

Sign me up. I really wish there were more quiet 3rd party spaces too. Reading rooms, quiet libraries, gardens etc etc They do need heavy policing though because hell is other people and sadly some lack self-awareness.

We moved to a new build area recently and it's lovely. Our neighbours are very quiet and respectful, only noises are children playing, but it's tolerable. My only issue is the constant building work. The sheer noise is too much. I know they need to finish, but it's constant.

Why? If anything, it's worse. People wandering around playing loud music out of portable speakers, deliberately playing loud music on public transport, and playing loud music in hotel rooms. And then you have sirens, protests, demos and outdoor concerts.

The fact that they don't let you mow your lawn for a few hours a week doesn't really help.