To complain about “gender identity” question on a registration form

[Manhere2024]

Man here. I just tried to fill in a form sent out by a charity, but one of the questions was:

“Is your gender identity the same as the gender you were assigned at birth?”

I tried ignoring it, but it’s not possible to submit the form without answering this question.

So I emailed them saying that I don’t believe in gender identity theory, & it’s discriminatory for them not to give an option for those of us who are gender critical. I have asked if they can change the form, or handle my registration in another way.

I think they’ll be surprised, and perhaps I’ve embarrassed myself. But I won’t go along with something I consider to be harmful and wrong.

AIBU? What will likely happen next?

Just tick the damn box.

Although I do feel there should be yes/no/prefer not to say options.

Or just highlighting that charities are putting nonsensical questions on official forms. Not to mention factually incorrect - you aren't assigned a gender at birth.

Thanks for highlighting OP.

OP is right to call this out.

We don't let forms ask questions in relation to disability, or religion, or politics, that have such limited answers. We allow for the fact that people might have a range of disabilities, or none, or consider themselves to be disabled (for example) and similar with religion.

We should not allow poorly worded forms to force incorrect answers. Everyone has a biological sex but not everyone considers themselves to have a gender identity. If people such as employers want to know about biological sex, they need to phrase the question in that way - and not confuse this with a perceived gender identify.

b) a man who gets off on creating performative posts which he believes will have women on MN fawning over him

Well he'll be disappointed then. As if women objecting to this nonsense will fawn over a man FFS. Doesn't mean the point he's making is invalid.

Q. Sex at birth M. F.

 Gender. M. F. Other - specify <span class="underline">_</span><span class="underline">_</span><span class="underline">_</span> 

Reasonable?

And I can live with myself because I’ve never tried to make the trans people in my life uncomfortable, or scared, or humiliated, or in any was ‘less’.

Pity the trans/queer community haven't done the same where women are concerned. Pity they have done their utmost to do all the above and dehumanise women into the bargain.

But then referring to yourself as 'a cis woman' shows you have well and truly bought into this misogynistic, homophobic ideology.

Just to be clear where this inaccurate bollocks gets us

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cp00de3r3qro

the person charged with is in fact male not a woman but thanks to the impact of “ooooh how does it affect you, it’s just a question/beeee kind” everyone reading this who doesn’t dig further will think it’s a woman

He’s not making a point. He’s asking a disingenuous question.

My thoughts exactly. Don't be such a doormat.

‘Charities’ aren’t. This charity is. The same as some organisations do and others don’t. Something that has been ‘highlighted’ on MN for a very long time now.

This is not a post that highlights anything. OP has an opinion (a strong one that he did not need advice on, because he knows how he feels and he already took action) and decided to give himself a pat on the back in the form of a post on a forum that infamously has contentious disagreements.

And now he’s giving 1% engagement on a thread to the same tune of simply self congratulating himself.

Disingenuous in your opinion.

For many of us it's raising awareness about something we think matters and demonstrating how to challenge it.

You clearly think it matters too or you wouldn't be commenting in the thread. I usually scroll past threads that I think are trivial or unimportant and yet you feel the need to discredit the OP. No law against it but don't pretend it doesn't matter to you. You are actively engaged in, quite literally, playing the man not the ball.

And I can live with myself because I’ve never tried to make the trans people in my life uncomfortable, or scared, or humiliated, or in any was ‘less’.

I trust your trans pals aren't the ones intimidating, scaring, screaming at and shouting down women gathering to talk about women issues, threatening to punch and decapitate TERFS, forcing themselves into spaces not meant for them and changing language to suit an ideology no one has to believe in if they don't want to?

You’re the one that needs to get over yourself and take some biology lessons while you’re at it

I'd add 'if applicable' and make this question optional, because not everyone identifies with having a gender or genders.

If they must have a gender identify question it should at least be honest

“do you identify with the social constructs & assumptions imposed on you by society because of your birth sex?”

yes
no
i don’t believe people have a gender identity

Yes, and that would mean only people who came from actively religious households could apply to this charity, excluding everyone else.

This is not a post that highlights anything.

It highlighted the absurdness for me. It isn't just this one charity, many organisations are putting these nonsensical questions on forms and posters can decide to push back if they wish. The OP has just merely stated what he did. Many agree with the action he took and some may feel the need to do the same if presented with a similar form. If it didn't 'highlight' anything for you why are you continuing to engage?

I don't see why they should think the person tasked with trying to complete THEIR poorly-devised, accurate and unfit-for-purpose form is somehow the one being stupid.

I would have ticked the no box. But really everyone should be ticking the no box. Because gender identity theory is full of stereotypes and no one in the world fits every stereotype associated with the concept of gender.

I think it matters when posters are annoying and clog up the boards, yes.

Of course it’s a disingenuous question. He has a strong sense how he feels on the issue. He took action on it which he agreed with. What is the question he is looking to answer on the AIBU board?

It belongs on the sex and gender discussions board. OP posting it here is yet more evidence of performative posting.

Because I don’t think performative posts belong on AIBU. He is not asking an AIBU question – at certainly not a genuine one. Put it on the gender and sex discussion board. But no, OP just wants the traffic of course. Or, one might say, an audience to perform to.

Then they should ask about sex. Not some mumbo jumbo about “gender identity”.

Christ the majority of posts don't belong on AIBU or could be shoe horned into another topic.

To a lot of younger people nowadays, 'queer' just means 'cool', 'individual' and 'special'.

"Are you dull, boring and the same as everybody else - or are you queer?"

Just like with the 'gender identity is real and everybody must have one' ideology, many teenagers nowadays agonise over what label they think they should use to pigeonhole and compartmentalise themselves - especially those who like to fit in and are worried about being called bigots and phobic if they don't play along with the Zeitgeist.

It's such a massive backwards step. When I was that age, back in the last millennium, you were factually a girl or a boy, you had a name that your parents had given you - although you could go by a nickname if you preferred - and apart from that, you could be pretty much the exact individual person that you wanted to be, without ever having to be forced into a narrow little 'identity' box.