To complain about “gender identity” question on a registration form

[Manhere2024]

Man here. I just tried to fill in a form sent out by a charity, but one of the questions was:

“Is your gender identity the same as the gender you were assigned at birth?”

I tried ignoring it, but it’s not possible to submit the form without answering this question.

So I emailed them saying that I don’t believe in gender identity theory, & it’s discriminatory for them not to give an option for those of us who are gender critical. I have asked if they can change the form, or handle my registration in another way.

I think they’ll be surprised, and perhaps I’ve embarrassed myself. But I won’t go along with something I consider to be harmful and wrong.

AIBU? What will likely happen next?

stop trying to change the world to fit your worldview basically

Oh dear, is your irony detector out of batteries?

Maybe they're not asking for help from the charity. They could be trying to volunteer or set up a regular donation.

🤣

Well done, call out this nonsense, every single time. It’s good if it makes them uncomfortable - for too long they’ve relied on making women uncomfortable

I have no religion. Answering the question either yes or no is inaccurate if you do not believe in religion in any form.

Nah we just have completely different realities and views of the topic. The queer and trans community is incredible, beautiful and resilient but I’m genuinely sorry there are people that think we’re all out to sabotage life as we know it or whatever. Anyway, have a lovely day :)

Your last sentence - did you mean it to be ironic? (And I'm not talking about the Soz)

See also, "When did you stop beating your wife?"

Why did you need to declare you are a man for this post? And why have you made a performative post on MN about it?

You thought something, made an action against it and now you will either hear from the charity or they will ignore you.

What are you looking for?

Gen Z have the biggest percentage of people who identify as 'queer' as it is a meaningless, catch-all term to them. Older generations see it as more specific.

Ah gen z were the ones to start all this attention seeking nonsense were they? Are they the lot that grew up as the internet was exploding? If so then i guess it makes sense. Everyone has to identify as something otherwise how would you feel speshul or know who your friends are?

So it's ok for people with a 'gender identity' to have changed the 'world view' but those who deal in reality, scientific fact and are GC are not allowed to have a say? I'm afraid the days of 'no debate' in this matter (or at least attempts at it) are long gone.

They've embarrassed themselves by asking such a stupid and badly worded question.

My thoughts exactly

Errrr, so you think they can discriminate against people for their legally held beliefs?

The queer and trans community is incredible, beautiful and resilient but I’m genuinely sorry there are people that think we’re all out to sabotage life as we know it or whatever.

Hmm, really? You are talking about the illiberal and authoritarian community that brooks no dissent and is indeed forcing their belief on everyone and demanding everyone comply, aren't you?

Idiotic, meaningless questions on forms as per the form referenced in the OP are the thin end of the wedge.

Believe what you want but don't force it on anyone else and demand validation or compliance.

Because sex matters :)

Always feel I need to signpost it if posting on Mumsnet.

So why did you need MN advice on it? You already made a decision.

Your username is ‘Manhere’ – that’s the signpost isn’t it?

I disagree. To me it's like religious or political beliefs, not something visible therefore should not be forced to answer one way or another.

It’s more like saying “do you identify with the religion you were brought up as” (an example rather than trying to compare directly)
The answer is not “I don’t believe in religion”

So you have no idea and no interest in understanding the OP's perspective.

I wouldn't say sabotaging but certainly changing life as we know it. Why is it so important for gender diverse people to have recognition on forms but also discriminatory against trans people if those of us who don't believe in gender want options too?

Either sex/gender is so important there should be an option for everyone or it's irrelevant and no one needs to be asked?

not to mention protesting women’s meetings even when they’re discussing tnings like maternity issues, actively campaigning to have words like mother removed from maternity policies, holding up signs saying “decapitate TERFS”, actively contacting the employers of people who don’t comply with their demands to insist they are disciplined or sacked, TW forcing their way into women’s sports, TW taking up places on course/programmes designed to increase the representation of women? That community?

I wasn't assigned a gender at birth because my family and their friends and community were feminists who believed something which is backed up by scientific research: that gender is a social construct. They saw it as oppressive, restrictive and damaging.

I was given a gender neutral name and was brought up to be aware of the stereotypes that people would attempt to force on me as a female and to be careful not to stereotype others.

This was very common back in the 70s and 80s. To be told now that we have to find ourselves a "gender" is actually quite frightening and upsetting. It feels as if all the freedoms our parents and we ourselves fought for are being pulled back. Our entire identities and existence undermined.

To ask that feminists, people who do not identify as having a gender, people who find genders oppressive and destructive, should be allowed a tick box on a form is not "pathetic." It's important to understand that these things matter. It might seem like a random, badly thought out form, but it's all part of a wider social system and interconnected, with wide-reaching effects on lives.

I was not “brought up” as any religion. It was simply not a topic in our family and wrong to assume everyone has a religion.

I’m a woman.

As a cis woman who hasn’t experienced this I feel curious, occasionally baffled, sometimes clumsy, but never uncomfortable because of how they identify themselves.

And I can live with myself because I’ve never tried to make the trans people in my life uncomfortable, or scared, or humiliated, or in any was ‘less’.

That's what I do when I see posts like this, and also questions about gender identity on forms.