To wonder if you would consider him a good catch?

[Twix33]

No driving licence
Has been living at home for years, has a decent deposit but apparently there's 'nothing on the market ' yet
Earns just over min wage- said he's happy where he is ATM, applied for 1 promotion then gave up
Refuses to do overtime to earn any more
No particular hobbies outside of the usual footy, going for food etc.
Said he couldn't be bothered to learn another language, even just a few words
No particular skills or talents
I'd say he's fairly nice but not lovely, he's one of those who's good at acting friendly and being polite but he's not the most honest of people and wouldn't go out of his way for you, but he's not nasty or aggressive at all
I'd say he is ok ish looking, wouldn't consider handsome at all

You're probably thinking what on earth is the point of this thread, but if you read this list would you think 'id go for someone like that', or 'I can do better'?

Made me laugh out loud! ^^

I’ll leave the queue thanks!

OP cast him from your mind. He’s not for you.

Edited for typo.

This thread is really making me consider how any of us could be seen by others. And how many of us would actually be considered a good catch. According to that list, I'm a better catch in my 40s than I was in my early 20s! Had a cracking rack back then though, which probably mitigated my inability to drive, lack of hobbies, low paid job and selfishness.

He sounds a bit boring. But there's nothing actually wrong with that and he's probably just right for somebody. It doesn't sound like that somebody is you though.

Being boring is one thing (and even that is very subjective). Being totally unmotivated, unambitious and content with mediocrity at the age of 31 is not great and not something that will change.

I agree. But someone will be a perfect match for that.

This thread is weird, never even met this guy yet here we are telling each other he’s boring and hopeless based on a list of negative traits from someone who wants us to give her permission not to date him 😂

Just move on OP. Life’s too short.

@Wheredidileavemycarkeys It is a bit odd, he is very obviously not a catch and the OP knows it.

Sometimes a stable, kind man is better than some flashy guy, although that's not the case here.

This is a horrible thread, poor guy.. so what if he's not inspiring..
I know plenty of people who were living at home at that age, nothing wrong with them, it's quite common here.. most have ended up building their own houses so needed to save a lot. I get he's not thinking like that but there's a lot we don't know.
I just find it horrible. You clearly don't like him OP and are judging him terribly. Why not just decide not to date him instead of setting up a thread purely to bash him

Still living at home being comfortable. The greatest risk is that he is looking for another mommy. You want to be that? He sounds like he has all the makings of a mooch.

@Rowen32 Agreed. I don't really understand the point of this thread.

OP it's obvious from the way you've written this that you don't think he's a catch, and you just want everyone to agree. You haven't presented an objective list of pros and cons, you've just listed out all the reasons you don't want to date him and then asked "would you date this man?"

If you don't want to date him, don't date him, but this is very ill-natured. Imagine coming across a list of all the things that made you an "unworthy" match?

He sounds awful, OP.
The living at home I can cope with, but being dishonest, having no hobbies or interests, perfectly happy with a minimum wage job, lacks motivation big time. Sounds immature and lazy.
He'd have to be really stunningly attractive to even bother with a one night stand with someone like that!

I agree. It sounds like the OP was dumped and it now resentful.

Nah.

Sounds like a cocklodger in waiting.

Plus a bloke still living with mummy and daddy above the age of about 25 is such an ick for me. In his THIRTIES and still at home?? Massive nope.

I fully understand that people have issues that come up in life sometimes. Things out of their control. I get it. But still, it's a huge turn-off for me.

I wouldn't be bothered about the job so much. Not everyone is very career-minded. I'm not myself. And those sorts of minimum wage jobs, well someone has to do them! It's good honest work.

He'd be too young for me, but nothing like anyone I would be interested in, and vice versa, we'd have absolutely nothing in common (apart from we both eat out occasionally).

Single for 6 years is fairly unusual at his age and a fairly good indicator that he doesn't wish or is able to be in a relationship.

I’ve been single for six years and I’m a similar age. Reason? Every man I’ve met since my last partner has seen me a bloody bank. I am capable of having relationship and want one, but I’m not funding someone else.

That being said, this guy OP is posting about sounds dull, unmotivated and a bit pointless.

This thread is harsh. Some of these supposed 'issues' wouldn't even be a blip on my radar. A lot of adults don't have 'hobbies' that don't revolve around football or Netflix, and if they do, their partners are often bemoaning how much these interests eat into family time and finances. The language thing wouldn't be an issue at all. And I'd rather date something who had a deposit saved and was waiting to buy, than someone who was pissing money up the wall on rent.

I've never been attracted to a man who couldn't drive though.

You sound fairly contemptuous of this man so clearly any relationship between the 2 of you will never work.

Like an earlier poster said, he could well be someone else's dream guy but clearly not yours so posting a pretty unpleasant thread about someone, listing out all of their flaws / negative traits doesn't exactly leave you smelling of roses.

I’m another one who doesn’t understand the point of this post. You’re obviously not that into him, and that’s fine. You’ve framed him in a very negative way, which could be done about any one of us. Someone who really liked him would have a lot more positives to say about him.
This is coming across as mean.

The fact you’re even posting tells me you don’t like him like that but for some reason you need other people to tell you he’s not a catch. He is someone else’s catch - but not yours, the girl for him would not be wondering these things. I also second the poster who has said you are coming across are pretty mean to paint him in such a bad light - why not just look for someone else before tearing this guy to shreds ? Why not you tell us all about yourself OP and we can judge you too?

I agree with some points and disagree with others.

I don’t think not wanting to learn a language is hugely unusual, how many people in England speak more than one language? It is a lot to take on!

The driving licence would bother me but if I liked everything else I could look past it.

The low paid job is irrelevant to me.

But you describing him as ‘not lovely and not always honest.’

YANBU to want better than that.

@Twix33 is there any spark between you? Living at home may or may not be a red flag - do his parents do everything for him or does he do his own cooking, washing etc? If not then he might expect a replacement 🫣

Finally. Yes, I agree.

You KNOW he's not a catch op. You've described him in the worst possible way.

At least he's not mean enough to make an online thread to get unkind opinions about you.

Everyone has flaws in their personality. Not just this one guy.

Is this a reverse ?

Is the Op this person ?

Not someone for me

I like people who have interests, hobbies & a passion for work, life, the world !

Not someone who sits on their sofa

hahahaha

No

Anyone can get on a cheap flight somewhere, especially when you're still living at home like a teenager with no motivation to do anything with your life.

Unless he was particularly good in bed- but even then, a definite no from me!