Is this CF or AIBU?

[CFornot123]

It’s a money one!

Recently came into some money (not insignificant to me but not significant either). I haven’t made it widely known and only told a couple of very close relatives (let’s call one of them relative A) but asked them not to tell anyone. Yesterday at Sunday lunch, relative B was telling me about a new hobby (an expensive one) they’ve decided to start but they’re struggling to afford to buy the required equipment.
This morning I got a message from relative B asking if I’d mind buying them the equipment they need for their hobby as a gift (approx 2k in all). Turns out relative A told them all about the windfall, how much and told relative B I’d buy them what they needed.
AIBU to think both A and B are out of order? I asked A not to tell anyone and had no reason to assume they would. Why should I fund B’s new expensive hobby? If they can’t afford it then choose something different? Or should I give them the money they need?

edited to add that relative B wasn’t one of the people I personally told so should not have known

You shouldn't tell anyone about windfalls. I would only tell my husband. Of course its cheeky expecting you to hand over 2,000 like it's nothing. At that rate, you'll have nothing left at the end. I'd explain that it's been invested and locked in for a long period of time.

Tell your sibling that your mum is wrong. You're not paying.

And tell your mum to keep her trap shut.

'And definitely don't justify or make an excuse/lie about why you can't give them the cash.....just a hard NO!'
In an ideal world, yes, but the problem with this is that it leaves the door open for pestering and 'emergencies' and more stress. Not everyone can keep up the refusal.
'It's not there anymore' closes the door.

Definitely CF.

Asking for a £200 loan isn't so bad.

£2k would be pushing it with a replayment plan over a year or 2.

Asking for a gift if £2k.

Yeah they can both fuck right off.

Enjoy your windfall

Give them the princely sum of fuck all.

WTF? Why?

Fuck keeping the peace.

Like others have suggested, say the money has been spent. That's it. Don't apologise or make up long explanations. Just it's been spent and that's it. Then don't tell A anything about your personal situations again. Any texts after that pleading or with sad faces; ignore entirely.

The cheeeeeeeek of both of them!!!

it ends in off, cheeky is not the word

Never ever tell anyone if you come into money.

Fuck that.

Wow that’s really bad, sorry they did this. Just text back and say sorry it’s invested or accounted for, I can’t. Leave it there.

Both are Cheeky Fuckers. A knew Exactly what they were doing when they told B.
Does indeed feel like A is a parent and B is a golden child here...

You don't owe B anything. Just say no.

Invest your little windfall so it makes a difference for you.

Tell them your broke deny you won anything

All of the above-
Don’t trust A ever again and text them with how disappointed you were that they shared something you had told them in confidence.
B is a CF wanting you to gift them £2k for a hobby they’ve yet to try. Fuck that. No B, I won’t fund your new hobby. I don’t have that to spare. My money is gone one the mortgage/longterm invested for the future.

I think I'd be tempted to say " What makes you think I have a spare 2k?..
"A told me you've had a windfall of..."
" Haha, if only! A is shitstirring again!"

But really, it totally depends...on how much the windfall is, what percentage B's request is of the total, whether you like B, and what your relationship to B is.
If B was my child, I'd almost certainly give them the money. If B was my sibling and we had a reasonable relationship, then I'd probably give them the money.
What is your relationship with B like normally?

A is mum, B is favourite child?

Both CF. You don't have to give anything to either. And obvs don't share any further information about your finances.

😂

Wow!

"A told me that you'd got some money, so I've been thinking carefully and THIS is how I would like to spend it!"

Did A tell B that you'd got a wedge of cash and were desperately trying to find something - anything - to spend it on?! Of all the things that you may need money for, a hobby? And not even costs to maintain/keep a longstanding hobby going, but a brand new one that you've just thought up?!

OP, I've decided I'd like to start a hobby as an amateur custodian of £5,000 - would you mind pinging it over to me, please?!

They are both cheeky fuckers. Don't give either of them a bloody penny. Bastards.

Just say no.

A quick message separately to both of them saying something like this:

"Hi A - I cannot believe how you broke my confidence by telling B of my little windfall and also leading them to believe that I would pay for Hobby Equipment. I am utterly disgusted by you doing this. It was not your information to share. I will have to take time to decide if I can trust you again even with the smallest of things. Please don't contact me. If I decide to resume contact, I will contact you. Regards @CFornot123 "

and for B I'd send something like this:
"Hi B - I believe that A shared some personal and private information of mine with you without my permission. Unfortunately I will not be buying you your Hobby Equipment and it was entirely wrong of A to say to you that I would. I have plans for my meagre windfall and my financial advisor has told me that buying ski equipment/horse riding equipment is not a good investment. I hope you'll be able to make alternative arrangements."

A was a massive CF and B, I'm guessing was chancing their arm as a result. I'd be having strong words with A and give B some distance as neither has shown themselves in the best light.

Sorry! I put some in my pension and gave the rest to a donkey sanctuary!

And never trust A again.

So they don’t even want to borrow the money, but want the money as a gift?

Err, No!

(hobby - cycling? )

And this is one of those situations whereby you’re made to feel the baddy( for refusing) even though you’ve done nothing wrong.

absolute CF of the highest order
note to self keep shtum about money in future