To be irritated that my dh couldn’t just buy the kids a souvenir each

[Shitvenir]

Instead of a random plush to share?

He’s been away with work for a week. One FaceTime in all that time. Most of my text’s unanswered (I only sent 3 a day tops). It wasn’t his idea to bring something back for them, I suggested it might be nice so they knew he was thinking of them. A bag of sweets they wouldn’t get at home or something small, even a bloody pen each surely would be nicer than a stuffed animal that neither of them can have in their bed without the other being upset? I just wanted him to be a bit thoughtful.

Don't forget that her children are trash and don't share properly .
Also greedy for needing presents in the first place.

This made me laugh 😆

I disagree. It would be normal in my family, we are all different and different opinions are allowed in AIBU.

Dh just apologised to our dog for not having got him something. It has tipped me over the edge 😂 He’s been sent to do school run while I go to the gym!

At least he apologized. But, he should not be surprised if the dog leaves him a "present" in his shoe.

This thread is almost too funny!

"I must remember to only text DH 2 1/2 times a day. I don't want to set him off on a panic attack."😳😱

Why should they not? Personal preference.

That “poor guy” having to hear his phone beep 3 times in 24 hours. I hope he’s ok … 3 texts is not a lot.

Your comment is ridiculous.

@Shitvenir ok so the dog could adopt Snowy and it becomes her/his puppy.
He owes the kids a treat - ONE EACH 😂
I've texted my husband 8 times already today and it's not even 10am 😂😂😂

How can 3 texts to your husband ever be too much in 24 hours, I'm baffled by these responses. We're talking about text messages as in SMS right?

That’s what I was talking about, well WhatsApp, but yes. Literally, how was your day? Or morning, with a picture of the kids.

I used to work away a lot too. It was a case of long work days then back to the hotel. No time for shopping.

Not even at the airport waiting for your flight home?

Yes a definite derail. But 3 texts is nothing and OP probably wouldn’t have sent 3 if he’d replied to the first one. It takes about 30 seconds to text.
i know why he only bought 1 toy - because he’s a useless dick. What parent buys ONE toy for 2 kids. Idiot.

I cant believe what I’m reading. My very relaxed, very casual relationship with my partner involves a lot more than three texts a day! Especially if one of us is away. Absolutely batshit crackers some of these answers.

And yes, DH was daft and not very thoughtful.

I used to go to Switzerland a lot. The kids didn’t like toblerone and the swiss army knives got confiscated at security!

I mean, I'm sure the airport in Switzerland sells things that aren't Toblerones or Swiss Army Knives, lol.

Fair enough not to just buy for the sake of it, but you can pretty much always buy something - foreign Haribo, a different flavour of Milka, a keychain, a stuffed animal, a hat, a t-shirt etc.

My husband has nearly always worked away, starting before mobile phones, Facebook, nothing. We spoke once a week as this was the only call he was allowed from the hotel (he was in India), other than this we wrote to each other on Air Mail paper.

The speed at which all technology has advanced has been phenomenal and we now expect communication immediately. Perhaps your husband doesn’t see the need to communicate as much as you do, plus he is working whilst away. Also I never expected any gifts for myself or our daughter, it’s just an added pressure to look for something suitable. I was grateful that he came home in one piece as his job was dangerous at times.

If you worked as a team with your husband, none of this would be important.

You sent three texts a day? Why? He was working during work hours - so why keep texting?

Your small children needed to know he was thinking of them. That's your job. You're the only parent in the house when he's away. It's not hard to reassure them.

You could have managed all things children.

You could have called your husband once or twice when away and discussed all happy things home.

Alternatively there could be some underlying reason why you're so angry and petty and resentful. Is husband not faithful?

But my husband and I have both had to work abroad for work from a few days to a few weeks. The focus was always on keeping the routines going for the children. There was an occasional souvenir, but children don't care. You can just make it pizza night because mummy or daddy is home and they get all excited.

So why are you so angry? It's not because daddy didn't buy a packet of sweets from abroad.

Well done! Yes, times have changed and you do sound much older (wiser, and so much more experienced) than me.

🤣👍

"I just wanted him to be a bit thoughtful."

I understand your point but if you tell him to do it then it's not him being thoughtful it's just him doing the easiest thing to get you off his back.

I do this too! 3 texts a day when you are apart is nothing.
I always wonder about the people who says things like keeping in touch with your husband is needy 😅

Why though? Why buy random overpriced tat?

It's nice to buy the kids something if you see something that they would love, but why is OP's husband obliged to buy something?

You don't need to buy things to show you miss someone.

There is a tradition of buying gifts when you were travelling. That made sense when travelling was more expensive, and you did it less often. It made sense when travelling meant that you brought home exotic things that you couldn't get at home. It no longer makes sense when you travel four times a year for work and can order exotic things on the internet.

For the sake of the planet, I think we need to minimise expectations of buying random stuff that no one actually wants

But if you aren't a gift person, then the random sugar doesn't carry that meaning. It's just an annoying obligation that's bad for the kids' teeth.

It's a love language thing.

Is it fuck! It’s 3 texts throughout a day

ive just got back from a trip for work, couple of texts to say hello good morning etc, and something during the day. Sure can’t answer instantly if he texted me, but it’s not much to ask, especially if you have small kids

You've picked out sugar to argue with, from the many examples of non-sugary options mentioned in this thread.

If you don't like buying your kids little gifts or don't want other people to that's fine, but as you say, not everyone sees it that way so why quizz them over it instead of just accepting differences?

This thread was actually about a shitty choice of gift, the OP and her husband weren't in disagreement over whether he should buy one in the first place.