OH has awful table manners and it’s making me question our whole relationship

[JosephineCornwall]

My bf of just over 3 months has shocking table manners….lip smacking, eating with mouth open, licking his knife, licking fingers (this is the worse one as it’s often and noisily and doesn’t use a napkin), licks the plate at the end of his meal…..you get my drift. In most other aspects I think we have the foundations for a LTR, however when I see him eating I want to dump him!! 😱 I have hinted at him that it’s not the done thing but am I being unreasonable to give him an ultimatum?

I worked at a place where both the manager and the chief exec had bad food manners. Sitting near them was like sitting between two cement mixers, and they both had the habit of reaching for something with one hand while loading their mouth with the other hand. (I had to resist the urge to tap their hands)
Staff lunches really declined in popularity....

As it’s just 3 months I’d probably break up with him.

Sorry, he’d have been dumped the second he licked his plate if he’s been my BF.

I have turned down dinner invitations because I know one of the other guests eats with their mouth open and I actually cannot bear to be in the same room. It doesn’t matter how great this guy is, I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who did that. For me it’s as big a turn off as poor personal hygiene.

Have a conversation. If he really likes you, he’ll address it.

His mother?

Does he do it when eating out?

In restaurants in public or at home (alone). YABU to skirt around the issue! Just tell him. Wonder what else he does 🙈

I have a lab too, at least he’s cute.

I'd not have lasted 3 months...first meal would have done it for me.

Rank.

If he's reached this level of grossness after 3 months, where do you think he'll be in 3 years, 10 years etc?

Throw him back in the pond or one day you'll be watching your kids eating like pigs.

Do you have a partner?

It's not petty or because of phobias. It's disgusting

I wouldn't eat at a McDonalds with someone like that

Many of my family swap cutlery around.

As long as they use it properly It's not a problem

He sounds horrific. I’d totally dump him for this. The only lip smacking sounds I can bear are my babies’. Anyone else gives me an unbelievably potent mix of rage and disgust.

I got the ick once because a man held his knife like a pen. No. Just…no.

Wow you make out we should be living like ' The Flintstones' and have phobias of bad manners ? I don't think you live like the rest of us . Would I let this bloke feed our child ? Do say you are joking ?

Well. Going against the grain here, I wouldn’t dump someone over this if you get on in all other ways. I would put the TV on and drown him out if his chewing noise bothers you, but licking the plate etc i just couldn’t get upset about. I actually think it shows he enjoys your food. Yes, it’s not appropriate in public, but I don’t see the problem with it at home.

I had to end things with someone who was like this. I did talk to him about it, but he just didn't get it. He seemed perfect in other ways, but I have misophonia so it was actually unbearable to be anywhere near him when he ate otherwise I'd feel disgusted for ages after. I was wholly relieved when it ended!