Why are you married?

[Aquarius1234]

Why did you bother getting married?

Do you feel one or both of you are insecure hense the marriage?

Do you feel superior to those in long term relationships but not married?

I am married through personal choice. I found someone I loved above all others and married her. We have a beautiful child together. We have the legal protection of marriage. We're also both Christian and so marriage is important to us. I don't "look down" on people who aren't married, that is their choice as marriage is ours.

Not really. I'm left of communism and also married.

Because administering an intestate person was difficult and we weren't ready to do a proper Will to work out childcare if we both died. By default we can now access eachothers money in death.

We expect to benefit from the combined inheritance tax threshold at some point.

We never wanted to get married when we saw it through the lens if romance. As soon as the financial benefits were clear, we did it. We didn't have a wedding, we didn't have guests. It is purely a financial decision.

Neither of us are jealous types or insecure and both are financially responsible. After 6 months we moved in together and a year later we bought a house. He put in 75% of the deposit and insisted that we would be joint tenants (equal ownership).

We are extremely happy and neither of us would tolerate a bad relationship (gambling, debts, cheating etc). We can both afford to walk away so there is no pressure to be together which I think makes for a low pressure, happy relationship.

I will sound smug and patronising here: when it's right and it's easy, it's so easy. Which makes it really hard to see people throw good after bad in a relationship.

No. But having a shared mortgage, shared finances, a dog and shared friends helps prevent us splitting up (not that we've ever wanted to!)

The opposite. By knowing we are married, I know I'm entitled, by law, to a better 50 50 starting point.

I’m not sure feeling “superior” is the right word. I think it depends on the long term relationship. Some you know neither are interested in being married. Others you know from talking them that to one of them (usually the woman) want to get married and the other is dragging their feel, promising to do it eventually or otherwise refusing. I do feel that my relationship is probably more secure and happier than theirs in those instances.

I'm 33. I got married at 28 after being with my now DH for 10 years and after buying a house together. I wanted to get married prior to having children. I knew that I wanted to cut back on my hours at work or be a SAHM as it made sense to have some protection in place.

I've never seen an unmarried person be judged for it. So many people choose not to get married, if someone looked down on unmarried people then they would get neck ache!

I like wedding cake.

On a more serious note financial reasons obviously and now we are in older and established it’s going to save a lot of inheritance tax.

Tax and other financial/next of kin reasons.

Had civil partnerships been allowed when we got married, DP and I would have gone for that instead.

I like wedding cake.

On a more serious note financial reasons obviously and now we are in older and established it’s going to save money via inheritance tax.

I like wedding cake.

On a more serious note financial reasons obviously and now we are older and established it’s going to save money via inheritance tax.

Because I love him and choose to share my life and home. Financially it makes more sense for is to have the legal protection of marriage for both of is.

I don't feel superior but I do think it makes more sense.

If we ever became unhappy and wanted to divorce we both agree that two things might stop us from divorcing. One is only getting half of the house value as neither of us could afford a house in London with only half the value of our current house . Two is our children and the damage it might cause them.

I'm very much leftwing in my politics. To me marriage is about giving your relationship legal status. Things like next of kin, inheritance, parental responsibility, property rights etc can all be sorted out separately, but it's complicated and marriage is much more convenient. I think it provides security for our children. I'm not sure I'd have been too bothered about getting married if we hadn't been planning on having kids.

No I don't feel more superior.
Married because we love each other and wanted to?

I got married because I wanted a wedding. I got divorced when I realised I wanted a partner.

This^
and no, I don’t feel superior towards anyone who is in long term relationship and not married but tbh I never ask people about this so in some cases I have no idea if they are married or not.

I have lived in my HA bungalow for 25 years now. DP moved in around 6 years ago (we'd been together since 2002), We had a Civil Partnership purely in order that he would have automatic right to remain in the bungalow if anything should happen to me.

Many women get married for financial security. Which is very sad IMO.

financial and legal reasons
moving between countries and having children gets very complicated without.

60's, and if you could convince them to marry I'd be very impressed , never have I met two more stubborn human beings! 😂 We've all tried to tell them, but they're adamant that they're fine as they are and have dealt with the legalities their own way.

It’s not sad to be financially literate. I’m not naive enough to think most marriages last.

Because he asked me 😆 Second marriage, I wouldn't really have been bothered if we hadn't have got married, but we love each other, have a child together and we wanted to make it official and it does makes us feel more like a family. Nothing to do with financial or legal reasons, just plain old romantic ones.

u ok hun?

I got married because I love him, he’s my partner in everything and we both wanted to get married.

Because:

• we owned a property and getting divorced would have given us a legal basis for dividing that in the case of a split

• we operated as a partnership but our earning potential was going to put us into different tax brackets and so I wanted the flexibility to put savings in the most convenient name knowing they were a marital asset and actual ownership didn’t really matter

• I’m divorced and didn’t want that to be my marital status when doing things like credit checks

• we will likely one day breach the inheritance tax threshold so being married was sensible.

But mostly it was to give a legal basis for dividing assets if we ever split.