Why are you married?

[Aquarius1234]

Why did you bother getting married?

Do you feel one or both of you are insecure hense the marriage?

Do you feel superior to those in long term relationships but not married?

I don’t feel superior but I do feel a sense of accomplishment in that I’ve reached my goal of finding a life partner who feels the same about me and made the commitment to build a life together. Note that I say MY goal- it is not a goal that everyone has. As well as falling in love and wanting to celebrate that with people we love, a legally binding ceremony is just good sense, particularly if you are planning to have children and may lose earnings because of this. It protects you financially.

Because when you marry it’s not just 2 people coming together it’s two families. Marriage is a signal to your family &friends that this person is now ‘forever’. Obviously you both know it but no one else does. Marriage is the communication event.

1979 and my dad was earning £4500 per annum in London but got offered in Glasgow with a salary of £6000 per annum. My mum was 20 years old and she and dad had been dating for around 16 months. My mum was also just completing her first year at midwifery college. My mum would have to go all the way back to the beginning of first year again rather than second year in Glasgow unless the move was because her husband changed jobs. They arranged their wedding in six weeks and will have been married 45 years in August this year. What has age got to do with the success or failure of a marriage.

Because he asked and I was pregnant , and it seemed the best course of action at the time.

Because we were building our lives together and wanted to be one team rather than two individuals. And we like each other more than we like other people.

Why?

You don't need to understand it. As long as it makes them happy, it's not hurting you. Don't get married if you don't want to. Let others do what they want.

I certainly don't feel superior to people who have chosen not, but I do worry about some people who I see as being very financially vulnerable because they aren't married.

Because we loved each other and couldn't imagine live without one another. 25 years married and still devoted to one another.

Dh was about to start earning the top end of 6 figures, being married saves thousands in tax, the proposal was me saying to him, let's get married, think of the money we'll save, (he's self employed) and we have 2 DC so also for legal protection.

Because I love him
Because I wanted to take his name
Just because!

Where did you meet your life partner?

Odd about people saying that men that don't want to marry aren't committed enough.
Isn't that kinda outdated. Men need to change their views.

I knew my husband since we were thirteen so there was some joint history there - our fathers worked together. When he asked me to marry him he said what's his is ours and what is your you keep (he earned a lot more than me then). He wanted a big family and a partner that he loved. I stopped working with our first born and went back to school fitted in and around raising the kids.

We have grown together rather than apart and supported each other through ups and downs. I am very lucky, he is a wonderful husband and father and I love him to bits - as do all our children.

But I still wanted the security of marriage before I committed to having a child.

I'd almost feel embarrassed to get married now. I'd have to do it in secret if it ever was to happen.

Why? Plenty of people get married later on. Unless you've been banging on about how rubbish marriage is?

Why? I got married at 42 and we had a great day, it was small with less than 25 of us but it was lovely!

Haven’t RTFT but I did it for my parents/grabdparents. Me and DH were the only serious couple in our family, with kids, a house etc. We had no reason not to, I adore him, but it wasn’t a financial priority for us. Mum offered me the money for a wedding and my grandad was very old and frail at the time, if I was going to get married I’d want him there, so we did. Both him and my mum died very suddenly shortly after so me and DH are very glad we did it, although it hasn’t changed our lives in any massive way it really brought a lot of joy to important people in our lives

I'd almost feel embarrassed to get married now. I'd have to do it in secret if it ever was to happen

Have you been wandering around for years telling married people they are 'sheeple' for getting married ? Because that would be a daft excuse, you are with someone you love, you trust them enough to enter into a legal contract, regardless of the reasons, you can both choose the type of celebration you have if any.

Why?

I got married as it was what people expected of me and I had already spent thousands on a wedding and said as much to my Dad when he asked me on my wedding day if I was sure I wanted to go through with it.

Worst mistake of my life. Definitely didn't feel superior.

Getting married isn't compulsory. Do it, don't do it. You're the only one bringing judgement to the table. I got married because I wanted to marry dh. It was nothing to do with anyone else's relationships.

I loved him and wanted the legal protection marriage provides before we had children. My sibling has been with their partner far longer than I have and I forgot they aren't married, I don't go around thinking about others Relationship status.

He needed a visa to move to my home country and the easiest way to get one was to get married.

Because he's the love of my life. He's my person.

For me, it definitely wasn't about "taking his name." Not for me, personally. Ditto to title change.