To think most women on here hate men

[Tanyahawkes]

Sorry for the rant but I’m noticing a pattern on mn, any post involving a man and a disagreement results in multiple calls of he’s a narcissist, he’s abusing, he’s controlling, leave the bastard!

I’ll admit that a list of posts do involve behaviour that is not nice from dh and dp. So many posts also can be interpreted in many ways too, I just feel like a large number of women jump to the worst conclusion first about a strangers partner, having only one side of a story told in a short version.

for anyone misunderstanding me, if a post says the partner is hurting physically, calling names, cheating, putting the op down, then yes I agree, ltb (so long as the post is true) it’s when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye” and everyone calls the poor guy a narcissist etc

@5128gap i hope I have tagged the right person, if I haven’t I’m sorry (had a brain fart and forgot to check name of person I was meant to tag 🤣 yes I admit to being a dumbarse sometimes, am I allowed to claim brain fog?)

My SIL has been a family mediator for over 10 years. She gets to hear the issue from one partner and then the other. She said that there is one thing she's definitely learned is that the account of just one side, however convincing, is very rarely the reflection of the full story.

The is the whole point of mediation, accepting that one situation can be perceived totally differently by the people involved.

It is extremely delusional to believe that what is written here, usually at a time where the main drive is anger and the need to vent, is in anyway representative of the situation as seen by someone who is not directly involved.

I'm not talking about severe abuse. I'm talking about the exemple of the 5 months pregnant poster who describe a situation in the park. Yet so many concluded that it was a clear fact her OH was abusive and that OP needed to leave him. Utterly ridiculous!

Thankyou for this, I think you have probably been more eloquent in what you have said than I’ve been, this is exactly my opinion on some of the threads, I’m reading one today about a woman who is fed up with her husbands collectibles (toys) in living room, he has a room he’s allowed to display them in and more have crept into living room, plus man cave not being utilised, and I see both sides. But there is a lot of mild sexism in the comments, but also a lot of people commenting saying op in their opinion isn’t being fair, tbh it’s the most balanced thread I’ve seen so far. And it’s probably still swayed a little in favour of op, including one woman who did not say ltb but said if her husband insisted on his stuff that she didn’t like in living room she would leave her husband

So, back to the point, sidestepping all the hatred of women, it's now abundantly clear that users of this site don't hate men, just hate it when men behave like cunts and refuse to be tone policed, terrorised, minimised or coerced into pretending cunt behaviour is ok.

Good to know :)

None of the claims in my post are unsubstantiated, a very brief internet search will provide plenty of evidence that these structural inequalities do exist. But it's not my job to do research for you and provide you with a reference list. We all have access to the same information. 2/3 of the board of directors in your particular organisation being women is not proof that we've achieved an equal society.

I watched a survival show on youtube about a group of men and a group of women on an island.
Guess witch group done better the men did.
The womens group did nothing but moan cry and argue and used their emergency phone call for help and supplys.
While the men had made a camp got a fire got water fish and a crocodile for lunch.
While on the womens side of the island they were arguing about who was washing knickers and how much the men were gonna fail.

There are actually a fair few women on this thread that have admitted to hating men

So, as stated, it's now abundantly clear that the users of this site don't hate men, just their cunty behaviour.

Excellent :)

What does this have to do with anything?

I think you are choosing to not see the posts where someone actually says “yes I hate men” they may have also stated reasons, they may not, now full respect for admitting to this, and maybe when they have said they hate men it was meant sarcastically, however this is not clear, so unless obvious sarcasm I’ll trust the person meant what they said

Cool story, bro.

I've asked a few times but I'm not sure I am going to get an answer

if a stranger calling you stupid on a post on an online forum is mild abuse how is your partner (of either sex) screaming and shouting at you not also at least mild abuse?

As I’ve stated multiple times on this thread, it could be abuse, but we have one side of the argument from the wife’s pov, we were not a fly on the wall to know if she’s left out anything that would be bad for her to have said, we do not know for sure if he was screaming and shouting at her, he may have raised his voice, I know in my life at times when I’ve been upset or even angry I’ve said things wrong when replaying how things have happened, call it exaggeration if you will, sometimes when we get upset it happens. Now if the ladies account of what happened is exactly as described, and if when she has he has a temper and can be moody, she means directed at her, then I will agree it does seem like abuse, if however when she says he has a temper, it’s not directed at her, he gets angered easily for all sorts of things with all sorts of people, then that is not cut and dry abuse

Great to see you back again, OP.

Would be interested to hear your response to the facts quoted above.

i am not going to be able to show any deleted comments now am I? I am also not prepared to go back through a long thread to find and screenshot any posts that I felt had the tone of “this is abuse” I cannot remember which comments made me think there was at least a good proportion of commenters saying in one way or another that she was in the wrong relationship, someone doesn’t have to say “this is abuse” to mean it is abuse, the red flags comment is at the very least saying they think it’s questionable enough to lead to abuse, or maybe toxic behaviour. Just because someone looked at every comment available and saw different from me, does not make their take on it and what they have to say as facts

Its true go youtube search men vs women survival Bear grylls your see loads its hilarious.

I did a find on page

There are 3 posts out of 540 where someone says "I hate men"

1 says they temporarily hate men because they are going through a messy divorce
1 hates men because they have been repeatedly assaulted and left with PTSD
1 was pimped out as a child by her boyfriend and raped by many many men

So not only is it a very small minority of the posts on there, thereby disproving your title, you are here still bitching about women who have been repeatedly assaulted and raped

I mean if that's the hill you want to die on then you go for it, but honestly it comes across a bit distastefully

Well sure but as with every thread posters can only respond based on the information they have

If people responding based on one person's point of view is so troubling to you I'm not sure this is the best place for you as every single thread is going to be based on that, its the nature of the forum

But ultimately you do actually agree with posters on that thread that this could be abuse

And as an aside, if a person has an anger problem and they direct that anger to lots of people, it doesn't then make it not abusive I'd they direct that anger to their partner. Otherwise you get into the ridiculousness of "well they punch lots of people so it's not abusive when they punch you". that's not how domestic abuse is assessed, relative to their behaviour to others.

It's not men that women hate,it's the shitty behaviour of a sizable proportion of men. There ARE some decent men around but omg they are becoming very difficult to find these days. Since the break up of my marriage 30 years ago,I have been involved with 5 different men and they all,to varying degrees acted like utter wankers. Ghosting me,lying to me, expecting me to finance them while they were unemployed, treating me like an unpaid house maid expecting me to do their laundry,cook their meals etc. 7 years ago I decided enough was enough. I've been happily single since then and the sense of freedom and relief is amazing.

I think the problem is, when you try to defend or counter a very serious thing with a much milder one, it seems as though you're clutching at straws, that you have no defence, just an ineffectual attack, and that you're trying to divert attention from a problem people are very concerned about.
For example, if there was a thread about attacks by dangerous dogs, and someone piped up to say 'well next doors cat scratched a rottweiler on the nose and she needed stitches. So its not just dogs that are dangerous, cats are just as bad', then people would probably be a little irritated with them for saying something a bit silly, and minimising the problem of dangerous dogs.
Now, that's not to say we would be condoning cat attacks, more that in the scheme of things, as dangerous animals go, the cat isn't really a priority.

You’re moving goalposts.

So now it’s just a “tone” of abuse.

Or a “vibe”

Yet earlier you claimed,
“so many people tried to convince the woman her partner was abusing her“

Just own it, OP. You’re wrong.

Nah. Im busy washing knickers and cooking crocodile for tea.

For a second I forgot the context of the post you were responding to and wondered what on earth was going on in your house 🤣🤣

@taleasoldashoney @PorpoiseWithPurpose thank you both for your insightful posts.