Inheritance in a blended family

[iwanttoholdyourhand]

I want to start off by saying that inheritance is never a given and should never be expected or relied on. I find myself in a blenders family unit.

I have one adult child (25) from my previous relationship and 2 children aged (11)and 13) from my current husband.

Here lies the problem. My DS25 father was an alcoholic and a drug addict and died by the time my son was 18 in 2017. He never really gave any money towards DS25 upbringing. He ran his own business so fudged the accounts. From age 7-16 he paid around. £32 per week in maintenance. He in reality earned around £7000 per week at the time.

My other 2 children grandmother is extremely wealthy and my children will eventually inherit around £1 million each. My DS 25 has asked if he is getting anything from MIL and I have told him no.

My DS 25 is extremely resentful about this and feels it's unfair and that his 2 younger siblings have an unfair advantage on him. I have a BTL property that I will give to my DS25 ( £180k equity) but he still feels cheated.

I don't even know what I'm asking l. Am I being fair with all my children . I cannot never compete with the amount of money my MIL has ??

If believing that brings you comfort then go for it I guess. Reality will continue as it is.

I actually did not know how wealthy MIL was when I met DH. Call me naive but It's not something we ever really spoke about. Yes she had a big house and nice things. Over the years I did realise DH family were in a different league to my own when they would spend large amounts of money of watches, sports cars etc. My family are all very WC in comparison.

And no I don't want MIL money far from it. I've worked all my life and made my own way. I've done my degree, masters and have a good well respected professional job. I have always earned my own money.

I wasnt suggesting you were after her money. But if she left it to DH you would not have this problem.
The reality is you love all your biological children the same and want them all to be happy. MIL isn’t burdened with the same bond.
I suspect DS understands this but is just a bit envious, as would I and probably most other people be.

This reminds me of when Heather Mills claimed she didn't know that Paul McCartney had been a Beatle when she met him! 😂

Some very good points have been raised which I need to think about. I know there is a lot of anti MIL posts but she is a good person and I understand and respect her position to leave her money to whoever she pleases.

Yes this is true. I just want all my kids to get along and be happy for each other.