DP suspicious hotel stay

[Rainbowismyfavouritecolour]

So I went away for a week on holiday with the children. DP stayed behind on his own as he had work. One evening after work he left the house and stayed at a reasonably local hotel because he got scared and felt like something was ‘off’ in the house. Apparently the lights were flickering (it’s an old house in the countryside) and he didn’t feel safe alone there.

He rang me from the hotel and we talked for about 5-10 minutes. He stayed one night and went home the next morning.

Now I think this seems really odd. AIBU to think something else went on?

YABU- this is normal behaviour
YANBU- his behaviour is suspicious

Good point, never thought of that. He is a fucking liar so why are we believing it was a hotel he even stayed at.

Except I think it was a hotel, and I think it was with a paid for visitor.

He knew you would know by the ring footage that he wasnt there

Affair / Shag / Call girl

I'm sorry to say that man is either seeing sex workers or having an affair, he's left the house at 6 and suddenly realised at 9 that the ring doorbell would have seen him, so came up with this bullsh*t story to explain it away.
I feel for you, I've been there. If you can get his phone and his reaction to you having it will be all the confirmation you need.
I'm so sorry this is happening to you, men are vile.

If she posted on here the thread would be, "I shagged a pro when DH was out of town and he guessed and stuck a tracker on the car. AIBU?" The answer would be "yes, yes you are".

5pm and he sent me a picture of him working

To me, that's an odd thing to do too. Does he normally do that? If not (and I would assume not) that adds fuel to your suspicions OP.

Geez I almost could have believed this story if it was midnight and he’d scared himself with a horror film or whatever… but 6pm!! It was surely still daylight!

That’s the most batshit , crazy excuse I’ve ever heard . Spooked at 6 pm when it’s still daylight. Not to be trusted

I don’t understand why if the house was empty, he wouldn’t bring an affair partner home. But then I realised you have cameras!

Someone he knows saw him 100% this

He sounds like a terrible liar. Don’t be scared to ask him more questions. It’s so strange to photograph himself working then stay at a hotel with that ridiculous excuse. You should bring it up in front of other people so he can’t deflect it so easily & shine a light on it there and then.

Was this recently op? Because at 6pm this time of year its not dark so why would he have the lights on ?

Well from what appears to be strange behaviour I’d be thinking that if lights flickering then a fire risk. So your DP left the house to possibly burn down, by not investigating and invalidated insurance by not contacting an electrician.
Are the lights still flickering? Has OP checked fuse box and switched all off and on to see if there is an issue somewhere otherwise DP is gaslighting.

Seriously it's 20 pages in....

This reminds me of the time my ex came home with mud over his knees and arms.
Apparently he had been sliding on his knees in the park, like a two year old on a wedding dance floor, at 2 o clock in the morning.
Definitely not shagging a woman in a field.
Definitely not that.
Definitely.

I love this 😀

Loads of reasons. Camera could be turned off but

1. Neighbours could see
2. Wife may come home early
3. Other woman may leave evidence of being there
4. He maybe doesn't want her to know where he lives

Did the OP not come back? Wondering if there are any updates.

And we will never know…

Not since her last one yesterday, on page 7.

Well he must be an absolute imbecile. Even if he forgot to turn off the camera/wi fi/ motion detectors - any of which would prevent his exit being recorded - why, when he realised he'd been captured on camera, would he not just delete the footage rather than ring his wife with a ridiculous "cover story"?
I have a ring camera and this is basic stuff surely? Deleting footage doesnt leave a trace either, it's just gone.

I suppose he may not have known this but I would think he would check this first before going straight to "I was scared so I ran away" ffs.

The idea that he was spotted by someone makes more sense. But even so, it was a seriously stupid story he came up with.
If he was, I expect the OP will hear about it sooner or later. He wouldn't have told his daft lies if he wasn't fairly certain whoever saw him would tell her at some point.

@Rainbowismyfavouritecolour The fact of the matter is, he has cheated on you with either a Sex Worker or another woman. It was planned. Everything you have said from the phone call, showering in the morning etc leads to infidelity.

The question now is, what are you planning to do about what he's done? Don't be delusional. He had sex at that hotel!

just wondering. Would it not be easier to get the Ring doorbell to ‘malfunction’ than make up a silly lie about being scared alone - if infidelity is the issue here?

She either in denial and keeping him, dealing with him and not able or you know, a Penguin.

My guess is that he forgot about the Ring doorbell until after he had left the house .

Or you know, with a real life!