To not go on holiday with stepchild?

[Ponnnder8]

My parents are taking mine and DHs child away this year on quite a big special holiday.

DH is now asking that whilst they are away, we take my stepchild away by ourselves, DHs son. I have said no.

I don't want to go away without my child and would rather wait until our DC is back and all go together. I have never asked DH to go away without DSS so I don't think I should be asked to go away without ours.

He thinks I'm being unreasonable not to spoil DSS this time because our child is getting a special holiday. But I just do not want to go unless our child goes too.

All the people telling OP she should go, doesn't it occur to you that the DSS might love a break with just him and his DF ?

As if anyone would bat an eyelid if it was the step child’s grandparents taking them away on holiday.

It’s over the top reactions like DH’s that create more of a problem in these situations. He needs to get over it and stop making a big deal.

Your DH cannot prioritise one of his children over the other.

Then again, he’s not. Your parents are taking your child. Your parents didn’t choose to acquire a step-grandson.

You can prioritise your child over your step-child, because your step-child already has two, living and capable parents.

And why doesn’t your DH want to take his own child away, by himself? Because he doesn’t want to do something for his first child that he doesn’t do for his second? Or because he can’t be arsed?

Maybe he could take his kid to eurodisney or another holiday. It would be a great bonding opportunity for them.
Tell your husband that if you wanted a kids holiday then you'd have gone with your parents with your child, but you didn't, and that he needs to stop going on about it

You are definitely not unreasonable. My eldest gets a lot of nice holidays every year, she goes with her dad. My other children with my now partner don’t get to go, obviously!! They do sometimes say oh it’s not fair she gets to go Paris ect but it’s the way it is.. I don’t take them on holiday then without my eldest, we do joint ones all together when she’s back.

Absolutely no way would I go away with a step child but not my own child. I would tell him that. He is welcome to take his child away by himself whilst yours is away with your parents.

Yanbu

Your kids should be treat the same but it's your parents treating him. No waunsjoulr dss have to have an holiday because your parents are taking their grandchild away.

Imo step son should go on holiday with you all when your son is available.