To do this at a child's party where I was the facepainter

[BrickTraybake]

I am trying to establish a small business as a facepainter just to earn a little extra money.

Yesterday I did a childs birthday party for one of the mums at my DSS's school. I did it at a discount price for her as she said she would recommend me to all the other mums and she is the PTA and said she can get me a slot at school fairs.

I have a system where I get the children interested in having their facepainted to write down their name on the list and then I call them when it's their turn so there's not loads of bored kids queueing. The parents sign next to the child's name to say they consent to me painting their face and then they tick a box if they consent to me using images for promotion. It's worked well so far.

So yesterday one mum puts a massive X in the photo consent box and writes next to it NO PHOTOS NO SOCIAL MEDIA!! fair enough.

When it came to that child's turn, I wrote next to her name "pink Tshirt" just to remind me of who she was in case I accidently got her in the background of a pic.

Mum paid up, everyone happy. Then later on Facebook I saw her post thanking everyone for coming to the party and the mum of pink t-shirt girl wrote underneath "thanks for inviting us! Shame facepainter wrote down details of what my child was wearing?? Bit odd 😂" and the mum shock-reacted it.

I'm so upset. I was so looking forward to hopefully getting more party bookings and a place at the school fairs. This was only my third party and now I'm worried this mum will gossip that I'm a wierdo and I won't get any more.

Was I in the wrong? Should I reply??

I hope she doesnt read this

This

@BrickTraybake The longer you leave it the more people will see her comment without any explanation so don't overthink it and just reply!

Bless you OP, I get it. But you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong you did a great job, people were happy. This mum sounds like a massive PITA, just reply with one of the suggestions up thread and chalk it up to experience. I repeat YOU DID NOTHING WRONG!

This response is great.

As an alternative to writing down clothing, you could offer parents a hi viz sticker of obnoxiously large size to identify their child. The child will not want to wear it and the parent will have no problem complying with you writing down their clothes instead 😅

I'd say:

It was so I could easily identified her to ensure she did not appear in the background of any photos as per consent form. I hope she enjoyed the party!

this

You should have replied already. Have you done so yet?

Overthinking to the max! If you spot comments like this going forward just reply promptly and professionally if there is a response to give (as in this case). Otherwise shrug and move on!

Yes, just reply something like this to explain.
You had a good reason and other parents will be able to see how responsible and thorough you were being.

What a nasty, horrible, unnecessary comment

Just be polite and factual

“Hi, I’m so glad you liked the face painting. Just to clarify I noted down your child’s top as I wanted to ensure that I didn’t accidentally share any pictures where she was in the background per your request. Thanks so much again for your feedback though, as a new business it’s really valuable”.

Side note. Make sure you have insurance.

This is perfect. Short and succinct. Maybe just add in

I made a note of the colour of your child’s top so I could easily identify her to ensure she did not appear in the background of any photos as per consent form. Profuse apologies if this caused you any concern. I hope she enjoyed the party!

What on earth did the mum think you were up to by noting the colour of her child’s top anyway? Batshit!

Do it now.

Lots of good models here, though I lean towards the shortest. Don’t overthink, don’t PM: just do it.

Reply asap. The longer you leave it the more people will see her comment and wonder why you did that.

Omg!!

I did it. I used one of the replies on here. Thank you so much.
I did it then closed my phone with my heart pumping and went sort dinner. When I looked at my phone half an hour later 8 of the other mums had liked my comment and five of them wrote underneath her comment but to me, stuff like 'thanks so much for the facepainting xyz loved it" and then on the same post but a separate comment one of them asked me if I would do her DS's party. It was like they could all see what she was doing and they were sticking up for me I am so grateful - I hardly know them. I think I agree they do all know she's a bit of a nightmare.

And then I went to put my DD in the bath glanced at phone again and she had deleted her comment.

Whoop 🥳

Amazing OP, what an outcome.

Very pleased for you, OP. :)

Well done, don't worry about needing to 'toughen up' - you do but it'll come naturally as you grow to know your worth.

Still remember the first party I did (not face paint but entertaining). I was so nervous and something like this would have really knocked me but 13 years later I'm still working and it would be such a non-event. You'll get to that point I promise. You are clearly brilliant at what you do to have had so many positive comments.

Well done!

@BrickTraybake yay! The truth prevails 😁

Well of course they'd know if there was only one child with that name , it was a child's birthday party. What's wrong with being honest?

Well done! It’s normally best to calmly and politely stick up for yourself with these things. People can spot unreasonable people a mile off!

“So pleased she enjoyed the face painting! Because there are so many children to paint, I like to keep a track of who’s who so I use clothing descriptions in my own notes to make it easier.”