To do this at a child's party where I was the facepainter

[BrickTraybake]

I am trying to establish a small business as a facepainter just to earn a little extra money.

Yesterday I did a childs birthday party for one of the mums at my DSS's school. I did it at a discount price for her as she said she would recommend me to all the other mums and she is the PTA and said she can get me a slot at school fairs.

I have a system where I get the children interested in having their facepainted to write down their name on the list and then I call them when it's their turn so there's not loads of bored kids queueing. The parents sign next to the child's name to say they consent to me painting their face and then they tick a box if they consent to me using images for promotion. It's worked well so far.

So yesterday one mum puts a massive X in the photo consent box and writes next to it NO PHOTOS NO SOCIAL MEDIA!! fair enough.

When it came to that child's turn, I wrote next to her name "pink Tshirt" just to remind me of who she was in case I accidently got her in the background of a pic.

Mum paid up, everyone happy. Then later on Facebook I saw her post thanking everyone for coming to the party and the mum of pink t-shirt girl wrote underneath "thanks for inviting us! Shame facepainter wrote down details of what my child was wearing?? Bit odd 😂" and the mum shock-reacted it.

I'm so upset. I was so looking forward to hopefully getting more party bookings and a place at the school fairs. This was only my third party and now I'm worried this mum will gossip that I'm a wierdo and I won't get any more.

Was I in the wrong? Should I reply??

Just reply ‘it was for my own record to identify your dd so I could adhere to your request for no photos / SM’

Obviously explain why you wrote it in detail

Just explain.
You had a very valid reason and this mother sounds very weird.

Just explain why you did it in a very non confrontational manner.

Of course you should reply explaining

You're going to need to toughen up.

Just reply with what @Bluebellsinthesun said.

I agree, I'd write that sometimes you write down outfits so you can comply with any requests to make sure that child isn't in any social media/advertising materials

Just explain.
@Bluebellsinthesun post is perfect as it's factual, neutral, and professional.
You'd actually go up in my estimation, not down.

Yeah, just a brief explanation and then forget about it.

You're working with the public now and the public can be weird 🤷‍♂️

Explain in a professional manner.

Just reply politely 'Hi X, I made a note of what your child was wearing as you requested no photos/social media and I wanted to be sure she wasn't in the background of any other photos. I hope she enjoyed the party and was pleased with her face paint'

Of course you should reply! Part of the work I do is social media and we've found that the more honest and human we are in responses to some petty and needless comments, the more people seem to respect it and respond positively.

Definitely reply “hiya, just to reassure you, I wrote the colour of your daughters t shirt so that I could ensure I followed your request not to put any photos of her on social media. This is a usual part of my consent process. Glad you enjoyed it”

I agree with the consensus, just tell them you made an extra note to make sure her DC didn't appear in the background of any photos so you didn't show her on SM like her mum wanted. Makes perfect sense. If she'd a decent person she'll apologise and let it go.

Reply!!

"Thanks for your feedback. As you ticked the 'no social media photos' box I needed to be able to identify your daughter in group images to make sure I adhered to your wishes and kept her off social media. Respecting parents wishes is of paramount importance to me and my business and writing down a distinctive piece of clothing is the easiest way to make sure no mistakes are made."

Shouldn't they actually be filling in and signing proper photo consent forms?

We take lots of photos of families through my work and the wording is quite thorough.

Having said that, I work for my local council so maybe that's why?

Yes - just post a straightforward comment on why you noted the colour of the t shirt with a nice follow up comment eg ‘I always note down clothing colour when parents request that their child not be included in the photos so I can check they’re not accidentally in any photos in the background. Hope all the children loved their faces - they were lovely to work with.’

Exactly. Be correct to the verge of pomposity.

Every school trip consent form we fill n is just a tick box with 'can these photos be used on social media'

You need to toughen up if dealing with the public providing a paid for service op. A minority of people are unreasonable mentalists. Part of being a business owner is accepting this and dealing with it calmly and professionally

Worldwide Privacy Tour vibes.

I would definitely respond

Of course you reply. Keep it cheerful and to the point. The example above is great, making sure to say that you hope all the kids had a great day and maybe say how much fun you had with all the designs they chose.

See I'd leave her request out of it. Keep it as OP's generally policy. So I do write down the description of a child's clothing when asked to keep them off of social media. Anyone reading can join the dots and the "you said" "you requested" doesn't come across as professional imo

Yes explain nicely