Washing up - is DH filthy or am I overreacting?

[Washingupfury]

I have name changed for this. Dh and I have a disagreement about washing up water. He feels that you fill the sink, start with cleanest stuff eg glasses work your way through to the dirty stuff and no need to change the water unless the bubbles disappear, even if the water looks dirty.

I fill the sink, wash, rinse under running water, and if the water gets cloudy I change it.

I just caught him washing a cereal bowl in this:

I think it's disgusting. He thinks it is fine 'as it was the last thing to be washed'. We have agreed to abide by the MN poll for future washing up.

So, YABU DH is sensible and timesaving, of course the last few things will be washed in cloudy water.

YANBU DH is filthy and clean water and rinsing are the way to go.

DH is adamant that these things shouldn't never go in the dishwasher. I don't know why 😬

YABU. That looks fine and the bowl is clean. The test is whether things are clean when they dry. Your way wastes water and energy.

Agree with this. So kind of in between your methods. But your DH’s way is the norm from what I’ve seen, but it does sometimes make me cringe when I see the state of some peoples water. But I also hate seeing the tap left running for ages.
consider a dishwasher if you have space/money for one.

Think of the planet! We are not supposed to clean under a running tap, what a total waste of water.
Save water. Do it your husband's way and, at a push, pick up the tray of cleaned things and you could splosh once under a running tap as a compromise?

But I'm #teamdh and have never got food poisoning so it must be fine

Not rinsing!
Yes, that would bother me.
I rinse every item quickly just to get the washing up liquid off.

Ps my friend's dh saves the dirty bowl of water from washing up, takes it upstairs and leaves it next to the loo and makes the family use it to flush the toilet to save water😁
So, count your blessings!

I'm with your dh as you are rinsing off too. Unless the water is cold or greasy or otherwise minging, I use it. Fresh water with a bit of washing up colour isnt germs.

He doesn't rinse though! If he did I wouldn't care.

Sounds like there are a lot of people wasting water with their washing up practise. I'm with DH but the dishes should be in a state to use one bowl (so cereal milk poured away before going in the bowl, excess ketchup scraped off etc)

To clarify, I don't leave the rap running the whole time. I'll wash a few things, put them in the half sink then when it's full give them a quick rinse and stack to dry.

I agree with your husband. Only change water if greasy. We use dishwasher on a daily basis.

I'm with you, although I'd rinse any items waiting to be washed (pans, roasting tins etc) to get any residue off them, then wash them in a clean bowl of hot soapy water.

So you have a machine that does the work for you & is environmentally friendly & would reduce your water bill massively but he says these specific items can’t go in it so you do the job by hand?

Does he make you heat the iron up by holding it against a radiator or are you allowed to plug it in?

I mean unless your drinking out of heirloom lead crystal from the 18th century a glass can survive the dishwasher.

I’m team DH, have you ever been able to trace any sort of illness or negative outcome from his washing up style? Your technique sounds really wasteful of water.

Well I am shocked. I stand corrected and will have to tell DH to crack on with his cloudy water!

I'm amazed at the level of pettiness and nit picking on here.

I wash up, my husband washes up (we hate dish washers) and I doubt either of us have ever noticed how we do it!

Do you follow him around the house scoring him points for each domestic activity?

Just let him get on with it and stop breathing down the back of the poor man's neck.

@DrJoanAllenby do you mean you don't have a score sheet and RAG rating for your domestic partner? How do you do his appraisal at the end of the year? Where is their development plan?

I should have stated this was a lighthearted post. DH has told me he still loves even if the Internet thinks I'm wrong so at least that's something 🤣

I think the key question here is are you all suffering from from stomach upsets after your DH has done the washing up? I suspect not. In which case, I don't think you need worry about his methods.

It kind of depends how much you are washing up, and what you are washing up.
If washing up after serving a 3 course Christmas dinner to 12 people, I would almost certainly get some fresh water somewhere along the line - although that would partially be so it is really hot to do roasting tins and the like. But if just washing up the breakfast things for 2 people, it wouldn't need changing.

Of course, like all sensible people, I'd use a washing up bowl, so any dregs of milk from the cereal bowl or coffee from the mug would go into the sink, away from the washing up water, and not into the bowl.

<faints>

How can anyone not rinse?! 😳🤢

I’m on team dh here too

Ewww he's a pig

Where’s the washing up bowl?

This 100%

I rinse first. Then the water doesn't get manky.