AIBU to feel irritated by DH asking me to cover up when I don't want sex?

[RaspberryRippleDuvet]

There are times of the month when I really don't want sex but my DH will still be really horny.

At these times he will tell me not to sit in a certain way that shows my curves, or he'll cover my legs with a blanket if I'm showing any part of them. When I seem irritated by this he says he finds it too hard to see me in any way he deems sexy as he knows he won't be having sex with me.

To be clear, I'm not attempting to 'tease' him in any way; I'm just going about my life.

AIBU to find this behaviour of his annoying and controlling? Or should I be more sensitive?

OP - are you ok

There's a See All function so you can read just the OP's posts. At the very least read those.

I don't get a see all button on my phone

I can see it and I’m on mine. At the bottom right hand corner of the OP, not with ‘Active’ and ‘I’m on’.

No just checked not on app or if you go in from email link

On mine, I see a funnel image on the top right (app in iPhone).

Maybe an iPhone thing mine isn't.

But by doing that it means you've given dangerous advice to an abused woman.

Such actions may be perceived as controlling and limiting your freedom. But, it's important to understand that your partner may be experiencing difficult emotions of their own, and talking openly about this between you can help find a solution that you both feel comfortable with.

Did you read her updates or just the OP?
He may be experiencing difficult emotions of his own, but that doesn't excuse his abusive behaviour

Such posts may be intended as intelligent, reasoned and rational. But, it's important to understand that they're pompous twaddle attempting to excuse sinister control tactics and make them the victim's responsibility to manage.

That sounds pure AI.

@FrederickaDaniels

A solution would be for her to be free of this controlling, sexually abusive abhorrent excuse of a man.

Check my username. I'm not really here.

Sorry, I meant what you were responding to. Which does sound pure AI.

Oh, right.

I don't know, it could be. An pompous, patronising, superior tone over a load of old abuse-excusing bollocks is very much par for the course for many of the dudes we have on here these days, though.

Yes, there’s always that. Or a patriarchal AI. The ‘intelligence’ it’s mimicking is that of Geoff, 60, golfer and Mason, UKIP councillor, liable to quips about ‘lady golfers” and ‘the lady of the house’. Wears slacks.

If you believe hes a wonderful husband phone woman’s aid and ask them cos they’ll tell you he’s been abusing you for the last 25 years

coercive
emotional
sexual

they are all abusive behaviours and against the law

I’m hoping you’ll see this for what it is.

you've been the boiled frog analogy sadly

please be very careful and get help.

So if you're hot and bothered and on the blob you have to cover yourself up because at best he'll have a full on mantrum about it?

What happens when you're not on the blob, does he just pester you until you give in for a quiet life? Does he monitor your periods as I'm guessing that's the only time he'll pretend he respects your wishes not to have sex?

He isn't a nice man. Being sexually frustrated doesnt give him the right to act like this. You don't owe him sex as some kind of payment for him occasionally acting like a decent human being.

The same poster is on another thread and couldn't even get the sex of the child correct, even though it's mentioned multiple times and also has very lame-azzed pontificating, disguised as "advice".

I think they enjoy reading their posts out loud to themselves.

So this poor lady has been conditioned to accept rape throughout her married life and genuinely doesn't understand that unwanted sex, even in marriage is rape.

And that her husband cannot pick up on her social ques and body language and is very happy to use his wife's body for his own gratification. He is a rapist.

OP, the price for a nice life and a nice home is not and never ever should be unwanted sex.

I hope find some peace and I hope you find courage. I hope you don't expect your daughters to live like this too.

My ex told me about the daughter of one of his neighbours. She was married to a terrible man. He used to come home from work and demand sex every lunchtime. She put up with it because of the footballers' wife lifestyle (he wasn't actually a footballer, but she lived the Real housewives life). She said he used to demand it even when she was having her period and she couldn't say no. These animals need to be shown the door.

How on earth did your ex know the details of the coercive sex life of the daughter of one of his neighbours???

Because she told everyone!

The door into an oubliette, ideally.