One night stands/casual sex

[champagnedrunk]

Both my husband and myself have only ever been with each other sexually. I have dated in the past and so has he but very short "relationships" I mean a date or two here and there, none of which lead to sex or anything close.

We met in our early 20's and have been together 15 years we have two young children.

Is it common for two people in their 30's to have never have had a sexual relationship with anyone else, we do not come from religious backgrounds or anything like that.

I see people out having casual sex and one night stands and just wonder why? What is the point? Surely you'd get as much sexual pleasure at home with a sex toy as you would from another person? We have an amazing sex life and relationship and and don't feel like we missed out on anything by not having other sexual relationships.

There isn’t a toy in the world that matches sex with another human being.

Anyone who thinks sex toys are like the real thing ain’t doing it right

You should add a trigger warning.

My genitalia just leaped up and headbutted me in retribution for the bad choices I made in life. This wouldn’t have happened without a trigger warning.

OP you sure you’re just not a tad jealous or curious …you probably think shit i settled down to young I would really like to 🤬 someone else ….yes that’s what your thinking your just deflecting it your probably bored shitless of your sex life too ..I’m not buying it

Good for you, I guess? I know one couple who have only been intimate with each other. They’ve only mentioned it once the entire time I’ve known them. They don’t appear to think to much about other peoples sex life. Like many of us, they just appreciate everyone is different. I’m not sure about this post, OP. Just enjoy your relationship 🤷‍♀️

Yeah I've also only been with my DH and we've been together since teens but I think you sound really smug, judgemental and faux naïve. Only having sex with one person really doesn't make you special or your relationship better than anyone else's.

Sex is fun, is it really that shocking to think that some people might enjoy it more casually than others? Flirting is fun, anticipation is fun, sex without having to worry about washing eachother's pants or who's turn it is to cook dinner tomorrow is, I imagine, quite good fun!

Edit to say I also don't think much of the quality of your sex life if you think the same thing can be achieved at home with a sex toy! Oof.

Yep couldn't have put it better myself. I had a lot of fun when I was younger and don't regret it one bit. Wouldn't have a load of casual sex now I'm older simply cos I can't be bothered.

This 100%. Your preferences are different OP, doesn’t mean they’re better just because you like to think that they are. Imagine being that smug around someone who’s had to embark on a new relationship because of a previous relationship breakdown, death of a partner or DV. Also, lots of people who are single enjoy causal sex because they don’t want the strings attached to the relationship. It’s not usual for people to only sleep with one person for as long as you and your DH both have but if that works for you then great. You won’t be the only humans in existence currently to be in your position but it wouldn’t work for a lot of people. You seem quite naive OP but you don’t sound as though you’re young. I found it quite a cringy read.

Reasons why someone might not settle for the first person they sleep with:

1. They don’t want to.

That’s it.
Fair enough to be curious and ask a question about what casual sex is like as you probably won’t have it, but to talk so judgementally and degradingly is unnecessary and demonstrates that your actual purpose is to show off your perceived superiority, not to actually learn and understand about the experiences of others.

Less smug than judgemental and blinkered. Only having one sexual partner is a morally neutral decision, just as having 30 or 60 is, as long as it’s safe, consensual and pleasurable.

It sounds like you may be dipping your genitalia in and out all wrong. I'll guess you'll never know !

100% this! My husband died six years ago. I’ve quite enjoyed having other people’s genitalia in my mine!

Actually having reread the OPs posts I detect frustration. I think she has FOMO and is angry with herself for her wandering desires.

🤣🤣💯

I went through a promiscuous phase in my single 20s, and I got bored of it. Many people do.
I can understand wanting to have the experience, but you're really not missing out that much.

Bet you’re fun at parties 🤣

This might be hard for you to understand OP...nobody has an interest in your sex life or lack thereof.

”Has become”?

Ever read about Ancient Rome, OP?

I'm late 30s, been with my DH since teens and only had sex with each other. I don’t really find it difficult to understand why other people want to experience different things at all. People don't all think uniformly otherwise life would be very boring!

Exactly what I was going to say.
Seen it so many times in real life.

I actually can't believe that if the most charismatic, handsome, sexy and exciting individual came along (think of your favorite famous person) you wouldn't at least wonder/fantasise what it would be like with him? 🤔

Everybody is different 🤷‍♀️

It’s great that you found somebody you want to be with early in life. Not everybody does. I had an abusive relationship in my early 20s and I’m very glad I didn’t stay in it. I’m happily single now I’m my mid-30s and sometimes have casual sex which I find way better than using sex toys. I will never understand conflating casual sex with sex toys but each to their own.

I think the OP might be on the wind-up with her sex toy remark...

If you think you get the same amount of pleasure from a sex toy as you do another person, you certainly don't have an amazing sex life.

I would really feel if missed out if I'd only been with one partner.